All you were was just a transfer student, starting your new life in tokyo with a generous start.
All you wanted was a better life.
But perhaps, you just didn't deserve it.
✦ - - - - - - ↷ . . .
'W̴̴h̴̴y̴.. don't you look at me with those allu...
It was unusual. A strange feeling Kenma felt everytime he wasn't around [Name]. It has been like this for the past few days. He would feel anxious and distressed. At first it was a huge bother as it not only interrupted his studies but he couldn't even focus on his hobbies.
Volleyball felt agitating, gaming felt lonely and depressing. There was always a sense of longing everytime he wasn't around that certain person.
And when he finally put the pieces together, it was clear that [Name]'s company was becoming more than just something he wanted. No, the absence of the girl made him uneasy, he would fidget and scratch at his skin because he felt so disturbed. The anxiety of being separated from the girl was torturous.
He continued to scratch at his skin until he felt thick, warm liquid trailing down his arm. He glanced at it to witness the crimson liquid drip to his lap, staining his dress pants. The blood coming put of his arm didn't faze him at all, but the classroom and lesson was becoming suffocating.
In an almost panicked manner, Kenma abruptly raised his hand. The teacher stopped in her tracks, scowling at the interruption but gaze quickly turned horror stricken and worried upon sight of the blood on his hand.
"Can I go to the bathroom?" Kenma spoke, the attention of everyone in the room on him but all he focused on was getting out of there.
"Y-yes.. of course. You can stop by to the nurse's office on your way too.." The teacher spoke eyeing the dripping liquid. Kenma curtly nodded before quickly leaving the class.
His initial plan was to calm himself down in the bathroom but his steps faltered and his thoughts changed when he stood inches away from your current class.
His feet walked to the window of the back of the classroom on their own as he got the perfect view of your figure and the sketch you were working on. Your back faced him as he marvelled at the drawing of a panda you made for art class and he couldn't help but noticed how happy you seemed. It was clear you were enjoying the relaxing time scribbling away as he was fogged with anxiety and uneasiness because of you.
No one seemed to notice him ogling at you from the window at the back of the class but Kenma still made sure to stay secrete.
He marvelled at the way you shaded the panda at just the right spots, accentuating the way you made your drawing stand out despite using nothing but a pencil.
'amazing..' Kenma watched as you skillfully continued your activity, completely focused and engrossed with the piece. Kenma never knew you were so capable of something like that.
Before Kenma could continue spying on you, he quickly panicked when he heard footsteps towards him, causing him to make a sprint down the hallway to the boy's restroom.
When you heard the minor commotion, you glanced out of the classroom to see who it was only for the person to sprint so fast you didn't get a glimpse of his face.
You did however, saw strands of blond hair before the figure completely disappeared from your sight.
•••
Kenma skipped the next few classes as he stayed put in the bathroom stall. Unsurprisingly, his uneasiness didn't subside because you were still not with him, so what did he do for the whole time there? He tried searching for your socials.
It was ridiculously difficult to search for your account, simply because your username had no relation with your real name at all. Fortunately, he did end up finding it. How did he know it was you? You had a highlight filled with your selfies and Kenma spent every second appreciating your beauty. Your selfies weren't all taken confidently, some had that aesthetic blur effect, some showed half your face and some showed none at all, but there were those few photos where you properly took the picture and it left him astonished.
The sound of the bell echoed the empty halls of the school as students began to pour out of their classes. Kenma hastily stood up to leave. Now was lunch, and Kenma only had one concern.
He needed to see you.
At the perfect moment he walked out of the restroom, you stood beside him coincidentally. You blinked at him bewildered.
"Kenma?" You questioned, confused on where he came from and the way he looked so distressed.
Upon sight of the girl, Kenma took her hand in his almost desperately, he needed to feel her even if it was just the touch of the hand. [Name] didn't seem bothered by it at all and only stared at Kenma worriedly as she saw his poorly bandaged up arm and blood stained pants that were barely noticeable.
[Name] tugged Kenma softly, encouraging him to follow her. "Let's go get something to eat, Kenma." you spoke in that sweet, soft voice of yours that would make him melt instantly.
Kenma let himself be dragged like a doll by you, not fazed at all. It was something similar to what Kuroo does to him, but with you, he does it willingly.
You had him wrapped around your fingers and you don't even realize it. You had a tight hold on him that Kenma couldn't escape from.
•••
"Come on, Kenma! Be more enthusiastic!" You laughed playfully at the discouraged teenager as he halfheartedly set the ball to Yamamoto.
You were waiting for both Kenma and Kuroo to finish with practice so you could walk home with them. Whilst getting the chance to see the team in action, Kenma really didn't seem to be very excited about practice. His face had "let me go home" written all over it. You couldn't help but pity him but you also find his grumpy face cute whenever Kuroo teased and scolded him.
Everytime you told Kenma encouraging words, he would play properly for few seconds then go back to lazily setting the ball. It made you laugh.
You know Kenma takes actual games seriously but it seems he doesn't really do the same for practice, but he still gets the job done.
As practice finally ended, you noticed Kenma dragging his feet towards you and dropped to his knees in front of you, resting his face on your lap. You jumped from the sudden action but gently patted his head as your cheeks dusted pink.
"I want to go home" you heard him whine. You nodded, patting his head for him to get off of you so you both can make your way home.
The moment Kenma got to his feet, he immediately went to take ahold of your hand to be engulfed with his slightly larger ones.
You weren't sure where the sudden clinginess came from, but you let it be as you weren't bothered by it.
Kenma however, took this as you returning his feelings rather than a friendly gesture...
How I felt after leaving y'all without an update for months :33
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