Dating Mistakes

Chapter 15

Gemma

I have been swamped, lately. Loads of textbooks, sample papers and notes just lying around in a haphazard manner. My mother almost had a heart attack when she saw the complete mess that has been my room. But she also knows I have exams commencing in a week. So instead of chastising me, she'd, rather, decided to bite her tongue and leave me alone.

But busy is good. I like it. It keeps my mind from going down a certain rabbit hole. However, before I know it, my focus is all but lost and I can't think about anything other than what he said to me that day.

"For what, Gemma? For kissing me? Or for going on a date with someone else the day it happened?"

"You really can't see it, can you?"

"See, what?"

"That I can't just be your friend! That I can't have you looking at someone else the way you looked at me that day. That I can't stand another second being your on-hold person till your previous relationship blows up and wait around for you to find your way back to me!"

No. Not going there. I can't afford to do this right now.

I, once again, try to get buried in the mountain of papers in front of me. But only a couple a minutes pass by before my mind starts wandering of its own accord, again.

I hadn't meant to hurt him. That was never my intention. Sure, he'd been insufferable in the past but after all this time, I'd finally gotten to know him. His true self that he always keeps hidden behind the curtain of snarky remarks and indifferent attitude. He's nothing if not traumatized by the very own people who were suppose to teach him the meaning of love and happiness. I hadn't said anything except that he could talk to me whenever he wanted.

But in all the truth, I couldn't imagine having a life like that. While my parents might argue sometimes, theirs is a love that's hard to find and is cherished forever till it only grows stronger. And it breaks my heart to think that he never got to see that.

Well, he sure did try to.

I try to find a way to stop this guilt that has been eating me up inside since the day in the classroom.

He'd walked away.

He'd walked away because I had said nothing when he'd wanted me to stop him.

I hadn't.

"Ugh!" I put my head on the desk, more like bang it. I didn't even try to contact Liam after that day. He hadn't reached out to me, either. We'd only gone on that one date and after that we met at the park, occasionally, but then I stopped going to the park, altogether. I like Liam. I do. He's charming and sweet and just overall amazing. And to be honest, his silence has been nagging me for a while. But that's not even half as bad as Andrew's. He's been ignoring me for two weeks now. Whenever I looked his way, he averted his eyes and pretended I didn't exist.

And I'd been too much of a coward to muster enough courage to go talk to him. And then when I had, I almost wished I hadn't. Because I wasn't ready to hear that. I never thought I'd hear that from The Andrew Sanchez. And so I'd been too caught up in my own head to say the words I now whisper into the desolated darkness of the night.

I can see it, Andrew. I just wish you'd let me see it sooner.

I'm still trying to push all these thoughts to the darkest and deepest corner of my mind when I hear my phone ping. I grab it quickly, grateful for the distraction. But when I see the message, my jaw hits the floor.

Elaine has sent me a picture, saying "on a date again!" and standing there is a boy in a queue, looking up at the menu on the screen above the snack counter at what I recognise as Woodys-Lane. I know the place like the back of my hand because I used to drag Elaine with me there, all the time. She never liked it, though. In all honesty, she can't throw the damn ball right to save her life.

But that's not what's surprising. It's the the light brown haired boy in the picture that has me going through my own gallery to find another picture. Of him. I'd taken it, just like Elaine had. A candid. He never took photos. I send her the picture. I'm hoping against hope that I'm not right.

But nope. With Elaine's silence confirming that I am, indeed, correct, I pull out my contacts and call her. She doesn't pick up, though. I guess, she's still on her "date".

Liam. Noah. They're both the same person.

He'd fed Elaine the parents' story while his uncle's story to me. Noah had a cat but Liam didn't. Liam lived near my house while Noah lived somewhere around Elaine. She and I didn't live too far but it wasn't exactly that close either.

He'd been a mastermind. What could be his motive, though? He made all that up just to mess around with two girls?

I can't believe that two timing prick. Elaine finally tried to trust someone for the first time in, basically, all her life because everytime she'd made a friend, they'd left her or made her feel miserable about herself. Either, verbally or ignored her for no reason at all. They'd either found new friends or moved out of town without so much as a 'goodbye'. Her trust had been broken too early and too many times.

She's only had two friends in all her high school life and that too because we were persistent. She might show a tough exterior, unapproachable sometimes if you will, but I and Ethan both know that she's just a 17 years old girl who's had a very bad track record with friendships and has a fragile heart she wants to protect at any cost.

"Because heartbreak isn't worth it." She'd say. "I don't ever want to end up being someone people just pass their time with."

And he'd done exactly that. I love her so much and the fact that he broke her heart and had the nerve to mess with me fills me up with a new kind of rage. I feel bad for me, yes. I mean, I had liked him and it sucks that he did that. But my mind has been occupied with Andrew, everytime we were together. I don't feel half as bad for myself because while it, somehow, does hurt, still it has been Andrew in my mind, all along.

Andrew that I had almost kissed.

Andrew that had confessed to me in his own messed up way.

Andrew that I had hurt time and again just because I'd been too blind.

Andrew that I lo--

Oh gosh. I need to sort out this mess and Elaine still hasn't replied. So, instead of waiting around anymore, I decide to take the matters in my own hands.

I put on my shoes and call out to mom, "Mom! I'm going out. Gotta pick up some items from the stationary."

"Okay, sweetheart. But be back soon."

"Yeah, mom. I'll be back in a few."

And then I set out to find my best friend and confront my wannabe boyfriend.

......——————......