Just Some Lab Test To You? [Helliam] [Mature Audience Helliam]

Marriage Counseling Pt. 4

William : WHY THE FUCK YOU BRING HIM HERE!!?
Ms. Saria : I'm sorry, but I think this is a great way you guys can forgive and forget eachothers mistake, I have the police outside incase he does anything to you.

[My dad walked up to me and sat down in front of me, while Ms. Saria sat a little to the middle between me and my dad but just far enough for room.]

Ms. Saria : I feel this is the right calling for you William.

[I blanked stared at my father, I got the memories of rape, abuse back to me.. I still remember the torture he did to me, removed my innocence, emotionally, physically and mentally abused me.. everything went black and I started sweating. Scratching off my bandage on my thigh and making bloody marks.. Ms. Saria touched my shoulder.]

Ms. Saria : WILLIAM! Oh my God..
[I looked at my thigh and it was covered with blood.. I went too far deep. My nails were digged deep and my flesh was just showing, it was really deep scars but never needed stitches. My dad was holding my hand tight and was looking at me with fear.]

Oliver : Son.. please..
William : ..
Ms. Saria : I'll get the first aid kit. Oliver help me clean the floor.

[I was just silent. I stared at the wall and not even noticing anything happening around the room.]

[My therapist came back and removed the ripped up bandage, healed my wounds with hydrogen peroxide, and put a new dressing on it. I was hesitant showing my thighs to my dad as he was there cleaning the floor.  It just felt so weird, I feel disgusted with myself.]

[I began to cry in silence.]

Ms. Saria : how bad he hurt you..
William : ..
Ms. Saria : ..
William : so bad that i don't even consider him
my father anymore.

Oliver : .. i'm.. im sorry William.
William : HOW COULD I FORGIVE YOU!?..
Oliver : ..
William : YOU ARE NEVER HERE FOR ME OR MY FAMILY! YOU'RE NOT A REAL FATHER! YOU ARE THE BAIN OF MY EXISTENCE, YOU RUINED ME, YOU RAPED ME WHEN I WAS FIFTEEN AND NOW YOU DID IT AGAIN!! YOU TRIED TO RAPE ME WHEN I WAS PREGNANT WITH AMOS AND WHEN YOU DID IT AGAIN, YOU THREATENED TO HAMMER MY BABY'S HEAD, YOU FUCKING PSYCHO, YOU COSTED ME MY RELATIONSHIP, MY MARRIAGE! I HATE YOU!! I hate you so fucking much.. you ruined my life..

Oliver : .. i..
William : You don't DESERVE TO SPEAK TO ME! GET OUT!!!
Ms. Saria : William, please.
William : SHUT UP. I AM TIRED OF THIS.
Ms. Saria : I know your anger.. i know how you feel but-
William : YOU DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL!! HAVE YOU BEEN RAPED AT 15 AND ABUSED FOR TWENTY FOUR YEARS?!!
Ms. Saria : I haven't William. But I know your pain. My mom was raped at 12 and had me and I want to make a change and help people who was in this same situation and other things. I understand how it hurts that's your own dad had hurt you this way, and it will heal, I called this stage "Reform". You turn into a new person and realize all that has happen to you shouldn't impact your future.

William : .. it's just i wish he was a loving father.. he only loved me for my body.. he never showed any mercy for me and just..
[My voice was breaking, every word that I try to say just my eyes start to water. Ms. Saria hugged me.]

Ms. Saria : And I am here to help you and guide you. I am your therapist and always there to support your efforts, decisions and give you right wisdom to you for you to overcome these issues and obstacles.

William : i know.. you.. always been there for me for 7 years.
Ms. Saria : And I seen you changed for so long, you're like a son to me, William. It hurts even more when seeing you in that state when we get along like best friends, you know? But, whenever you need someone, never be afraid to ask.

[I nodded.]
[I started to pinch myself on my wrist, she lifted my hand and put another rubberband on me which was stronger.]

Ms. Saria : This one is hard to break. So it may last longer.

[My dad finished cleaning the floor and sat down in front of me.]

Oliver : .. My mind wasn't in a good state. I shouldn't of done this to you and I know you don't forgive me. I want to make this right and be the father I should be. I just want your forgiveness.

[He held my hand and stood me up. He hugged me. I was scared and weirded out, but I hugged him back.]

William : I can't forgive you. But I can acknowledge your apology to me.

Oliver : that's more than enough. I know this is the worse time to ask, but, may I visit you and Henry?

William : i.. uh..
[I looked at Ms. Saria, she nodded.]

William : O- okay..but.. dad please don't do anything to me i beg you..

Oliver : i won't.. i promise..
William : ..
[I looked up at him, he looked at me. I smiled and.. he smiled.]

Ms. Saria : I'm glad everything is settled.
William : mhm.

[I arrived home and Ms. Saria was driving us home. Me and my dad was at the back and we were just in silence. I looked at him, looked down and his hand was on my thigh, I panicked a little but blinked and it was just.. a hallucination. He asked if I was okay and I never answered.]

Oliver : Hey, do you want me to help yo-
[I got out the car before I even heard what he had to say.]

[Oliver sighed.]

Ms. Saria : Give him some time.
Oliver : Mm..
[I unlocked the door and opened it to go inside. Oliver followed behind me and closed the door.]

William : ..

Oliver : so..

[I went upstairs and to my room and closed the door.]

[My babysitter was feeding Amos and I gave her money.]

William : Thank you.
Babysitter : You're welcome, anytime Mr. Emily.

[She went downstairs and out the door and passed Oliver. Oliver went upstairs and opened the door. I was in the baby room rocking Amos to sleep.]

[I put Amos down and went outside, I saw him standing there.]

Oliver : Hey.
William : We have a guest room.
Oliver : I know I just wanna ask if you want me to make you something to eat?
William : I'm fine.
Oliver : When was the last time you ate?
William : Why do you need to know?
Oliver : I'm your father.
William : Since when?
Oliver : Since forever.
William : *sigh.*
Oliver : Please. At least let me do something nice for once.
William : .. alright.
Oliver : Heh.
[He held my hand.]
William : Don't hold me.
Oliver : We are just going downstairs.
William : Ok. I can go by myself without assistance.
[I went downstairs with Oliver and saw a beautiful banquet.]

Oliver : Ready to eat?
William : wow uh..
[He hugged me.]
Oliver : All the pain I caused you.. I really want to change for you.. our family.. so this meal is suppose to represent all the suffering you have experienced and made it into something.. beautiful.. and delicious.
William : Don't let it represent the past, let it represent the future, Oliver.

to be continued