life is like a lottery. It is unpredictable and can leave you restless. In some senses it is almost like a game of Russian roulette. Full of different paths; good or bad. In Most cases, these are choices you have inflicted upon yourself not being able to pull back at the slight possibility of a wrong dip you hadn't suspected, they were yours to make and inevitably will become your downfall or awakening . However unfortunately for Maisy, this is not all cases.
Russian roulette isn't always held by your own hand but can be turned on you by ones you once loved. By the ones you would Never deem possible of pointing the end of a death sentence right at your head, finger over the trigger ready to flex with no hesitations. In this special case it was her father at the other side of the gun.
The once blooming relationship the two held had suddenly been sprayed with toxins killing and decaying any sense of colour left in sight. The toxins which her dad consumed had spread and demolished the life of the Miller house hold and left debris in its wake. Her dad had never drunk himself silly and had always kept it to a containable volume. But this all seemed to change after moving to Chicago from their home town outer banks paradise on earth. It had seemed that very paradise had been the foundations and his earth for her dads wellbeing, so without that it all seemed to topple and burn leaving him with minimal pieces and shards of the person he once was.
Maisy no longer recognised her father. Instead of picking up the pieces he had become, he smothered and glued them back with tacky glue and faulty celotape and consumed mass amounts of drugs to drown out his despairing thoughts scratching their way through the poorly amended cracks.
These very actions seeped into Maisy and her mothers life like wild vines crawling and holding them captive in a facade of a happy family. There was no room for her to step out of line knowing she would have the inevitable wrath of her fathers predictable anger. The facade was brought on with her dads well-known amazing reputation he had gathered over the years and the family had to always keep that intact for the better good.
Things had changed for the worse after moving and they all knew that whether they wanted to share or not, it was like an itch that wouldn't scratch, an ebbing headache that wouldn't go away.
At first Maisy held hope for the slight speck of a possibility that they would return home, but days turned into months and months to years, these exact thoughts became like a repetitive story she would read to herself each night. Every time becoming more or less just her imagination rather than what was once reality.
Fathers habits became daughters so she sunk deeper and deeper into the depth of her mind until she couldn't breathe, entirely lost at sea . She was just under the surface frantically Kicking her legs to propel herself upwards but there was no use as there would only ever be a glimpse of the top, she would never get there. There was no hope.
Her hope had been in the form of 3 boys who she called her home. Home had never been in the shape of a building with square windows and porcelain floors and counter tops. It had never been flattened blankets and freshly washed and ironed clothes still smelling with a hint of lavender. Having been born a pouge she had never had these luxuries and had always deemed home to be described just like this; as grand as her imagination could fathom.
But that is now not the case. now having moved and her fathers joint business finally taking off. The porcelain floors were just floors that shined. Freshly washed clothes had an artificial smell which clung to it washing away any smell that could be of familiarity to her. It swiped away at everything the girl stood for.This is what finalised her thoughts, her home was in the shape of 3 scruffy boys.
One Brunette with floppy hair which always seemed to get in his eyes; his name was John B.Her old neighbour and right hand man when it came to pretty much anything. A cap always seemed to grace the boys head as if it was permanently stuck there. he never seemed to care what the weather was as he had always said "it is always a hat day, and I stand by that wether you agree or not". He always seemed to be the peace keeper when the two blonds butted heads due to their unmissable similar auras. Despite this he was always there when Maisy needed him, even when she didn't. he lead the girl when she didn't know how and she would always owe him her life.
Then you had Pope. The brains of the operations. The boy never particularly wanted to be involved with the groups plans knowing one day they weren't going to be so lucky with escaping the inevitable . However, all the boys had a soft spot for Maisy and this included Pope, so eventually he would give in not wanting to leave her with the other two maniacs they called friends. Pope always showed interests for her hobbies and made the girl feel seen when she couldn't see herself. he was one in a billion and she was beyond lucky to have met someone like him in her life.
Finally you had JJ. Whether she would admit it or not, a piece was left behind at home with that boy. he seemed to always be able to finish her sentences and read her mind even in the worst of situations. He was her in a slightly different font. Maisy had always been his comfort blanket of sorts, that's why when she had quizzed him on the bruises which seemed to creep up on his skin like clockwork, he had concaved and let his tough boy personer crumble before her very eyes. She had been nothing but understanding and heard him out after suggesting they skip a day of school as she said it wouldn't hurt anyone.
They had always been each others person it was obvious to everyone. you'd have to be blind to not notice . JJ had always loved how understanding and comforting Maisy had been and looked up to her in awe of how he had been so lucky to hit the jackpot in winning her as a best friend. After that day, bonding over ice cream and JJ having finally opened up, that was the start of something special. Despite Maisy never sharing her own troubles which was going on at the same time as his, she always put his feelings first and she would do anything for him, and that day there was a shift in their dynamic. Maybe it went unknown to the two but anybody could see it.
Even being thousands of miles from the boys they still lived in her heart, their absent presence becoming heavier with each passing second. Despite the love she held for the boys she knew they would never forgive her like why should they?
She had left saying she would be gone for a maximum amount of a year and be in contact with them all the time in between. She hadn't kept a single one of her promises. Despite the breakage of the promises not being voluntarily it still happened and she had no way to contact them to say it had been her fathers fault the numbers were deleted. By quote he had said "those scum are only dragging you down Maisy when will you wake up and see that, and I swear to god no daughter of mine will ever end up like that."
Maisy is no longer the girl she once was, now just a hollowed out shell. a slight resemblance of her past self yet you'd have to squint in hopes of finding it. for the past 3 years she had no guidance just bad influences guiding her into the worst situations and leaving her with piles of trauma she has yet to unpack. She was stumbling in the dark blind. Still is.
She is changed, that is crystal clear. The new information of moving back to outer banks would usually fill her with an overwhelming sense of excitement yet all she can feel is the sinking feeling of guilt and fear. To reach into the depths of who she once was, play about with the past and reconnect with people who no longer knew her.
However there was no choice as she is taking part in a command. despite going back to her familiarity it would be very different. She was moving to the other side of the island: that being kook resort. The very thought of being referred to being a Kook made bile catch in her throat showing her disgust for the word and what is stood for.
Clean slate, that's what this was. She could push her Chicago experience under the rug and build herself up off of a fake persona and be who she wants to be. She still hadn't decided whether or not she would reunite with her old friends. But deep down she knew they were like magnets and the longer she tried to avoid it the more they would ram themselves into her life.
Outer banks paradise on earth is what it's called. Finally she was going to see after all these years if it could stand up and become as great as it was known to be. It is all up to Maisys decisions. the gun is in her hand; paradise or destruction.
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Just a little bit of an idea of how this book is going to go :))
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YOU OWN MY HEART // JJ Maybank
Adventure"ᴛʜᴇ ɢᴜɴ ɪꜱ ɪɴ ʜᴇʀ ʜᴀɴᴅ; ᴘᴀʀᴀᴅɪꜱᴇ ᴏʀ ᴅᴇꜱᴛʀᴜᴄᴛɪᴏɴ." Maisy Miller was once a pouge on the island of outer banks. That was before everything changed. Her presence crashes the island causing a disruption in the oceans currents and making the island her...
