Uncertain

32-The new girl

"Delilah Miller, right?"

I closed the door of my locker and looked at the brunette girl leaning against the lockers. She was kind of tall, and my short self felt even shorter next to her. Her light brown hair was long, and she had curled it tidily. She had a little rosy cheeks, and her eyes were the same color as the sky. She looked kind, but at the same time she looked like she was easily able to crush me down on the floor.

"Depends." I murmured, looking around her. "Who are you?"

"Why are you always alone?"

"What?"

It was the second week of school, and I had been all alone through the week. I couldn't even say whether I was lonely or not, because I didn't even mind the being alone. I was used to be alone because for eight years that's all I did. For eight years I didn't have a family, I didn't have friends.

However, people started to notice my loneliness in school, and because of that I was an easy target for people who were insecure of themselves and wanted to unload it to others like me. Every day I was hearing the same shit from the same people, and that's why being alone wasn't as easy as I thought.

"Why are you always alone?" The girl repeated with the exact same tone, and look on her face.

"I have friends." I commented, giving her a weird look. "They are just not here, available."

"Right." The girl chuckled as she passed her hand towards me. "Well, I'm Ava, your soon to be sister in law's sister, aka your sister sister in law."

I ignored the hand that she passed towards me for me to shake, and just gave her another look.
"Ohh, you are Abby's sister."

I knew that my brother's fiancé had a sister the same age as me, and that she was in the same school as me, but I had never talked to her or even tried to think who she was. However, when I really took a good look towards the girl in front of me, she looked so much like Abby, and her smile was literally a copy of Abby's smile.

"I was just thinking that if you don't want especially sit alone in the cafeteria today, you can sit with me and my friends." She spoke, taking a pack of watermelon bubble gum out of her white backpack. "You want one?"

"Thanks, and..." I gave her a little smile. "No thanks."

"I'm obsessed with these." She nodded her head towards the pack before putting it back to her backpack. "So freaking good."

"It's just a stack of essence."

She gave me a look.
"What?"

"And thanks for the offer..." I continued, ignoring the sarcastically betrayed look on her face. "But I don't really need any pity from you or Abby, so, next time she tells you to talk to me tell her that I'm doing fine."

"Huh?" She furrowed her eyebrows. "What do you mean?"

"I mean that I don't want to sit with you and your friends." I spoke, shaking my head. "You don't need to try to be my friend because Abby told you to do so."

"I was just being nice." She gave me a confused look, speaking with a silent voice. "Abby didn't tell me to talk to you, but if you don't want to talk to me then fine, you can sit by yourself too."

She turned around to walk away.

The realization run through me. I was lonely, I had no friends, I looked pathetic wherever I was because I was alone always. The problem wasn't in others, the problem was in me, because whenever someone tried to talk to me, I just basically pushed them away. I didn't have friends because my mind didn't trust anyone anymore, and when a possibility of having friends came in front of me, I just ignored it.