Chapter 20

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A/N: I didn't know so many of you heard about Miraculous Ladybug! Gang gang!

TW: Self-harm ideation








I snatched the wig off his head as all the air deflated in my lungs. Bakugo looked shocked for a moment before waiting for my reaction with a mischievous glint in his eye. He really was Kuro. He really was Kuro the whole fucking time. Ice flooded my veins. All I could hear was my heartbeat in my ears. Memories of mockery echoed around me as I realized I got played. Again. By the one person I trusted not to do this. My lip trembled. The longer I processed the more his slight smile disappeared.

"Stop the car." I whispered.

He had the audacity to look surprised that I was reacting the way I was. Of all the things I ever thought about Dynamight I never thought this scenario would even be possible. I kicked the door and the seat in front of me. I didn't care what I needed to do I just needed to get away from these monsters.

"Stop the car. STOP THE FUCKING CAR." I screamed at Tokaji.

"Ma'am-"

"Did you know about this?" I yelled at him.

"Wai-"

"I quit. I don't care if I have to pay off that stupid contract fee for the rest of my life. Fuck this and fuck you. I never want to see you again." My voice cracked.

Disgust, hurt, anger, and embarrassment swirled violently in my body. So many different signals for so many reactions all demanding my attention. My head couldn't process a thought beyond getting out of here and half-formed laments.

"Was this a fucking joke? A fun prank?? Oh my god." I choked up.

I tried the handle on the car and it was locked. Panic clawed up my throat and I felt sick. The car was closing in and crushing me. My body shook as tears fell. What was his angle? Was it because I didn't like him at first? What was the fucking point?

Just because I had to audacity to exist as a fat person? Do I truly deserve this?

Memories flooded my brain. Being mocked and laughed at in school. People fake asking me out. The" there go your girlfriend" jokes. The feeling of being looked through. The anxiety of going on dates. The constant reminder that nobody wants you to exist in public. The catch-a-pig bullshit. The fetishists. The look of absolute disgust. The stupid constant up-down I got when meeting someone for the first time. The weight comments from family.

The "well-meaning" advice because I clearly needed help. I clearly shouldn't exist this way. I was clearly in a crisis that needed immediate intervention. An abomination. All of these memories latched themselves onto my skin and suffocated me. My tears burned hot against my cheeks as they poured out of me. I need out, I need air.

"Let me out!" I sobbed. "Let me out!"

I kicked the door again as hard as I could.

"Don't feel special."

I'll never feel anything I promise. Never again. I don't ever want to be seen again. I'd rather rot away. I'll never-. A hand touched me.

"Don't fucking touch me! Don't don't!"

I curled up making myself as small as possible.

I wanted to carve the fat off. Remold myself like clay into someone people could treat like a human being. I didn't care how messy or bloody it became. I needed this burden off of me. I wasn't able to escape so I shut down. I reduced my world to a haze, blocking out what I could.

"I'm sorry."  He said, his voice cutting through the static.

Kuro. Bakugo. A fresh wave of hurt. I didn't respond.

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