Finding Her

Cry

My dad retracts from me with hate projected in his voice
He cums as I scream and shiver
"That'll teach you"
"I- I'm sorry!"
"You're always sorry Maura! Sorry for this! Sorry for that? It's all the fucking same?!"
He leaves me alone in my room as I sob.
I immediately turn to my pills.
The pills aren't enough so I do a line.
It feels amazing and I can hear colours and smell shapes.
I dance around my room topless and I feel myself up.
It feels amazing and I feel free until my dad walks in.
"You're high!"
"Dad get out!"
I scream.
He picks me up and I kick around helpless.
"What the fuck are you doing?"
He throws me down onto his bed.
He grabs handcuffs and shackles my feet.
He rapes me over and over.
Allen watches me as I cry.
"What's wrong with you?"
"I- had a nightmare"
"Awww what was the little baby scared of?"
"Don't call me a baby?"
I sniff.
He slaps me harshly.
I wince as I feel the hotness of the slap.
He looks me up and down with a smile.
I'm naked so it's easy for him to just get inside.
"This is for your own good princess!"
He yells
I scream as he grunts.
I wake up screaming and I'm frantic.
I fall onto the floor.
I scream and I cover my ears as I rock back and forth.
Jane wakes up with a slight scream.
Jane looks at me and she holds me tightly.
"Baby baby stop stop scratching"
I look down to see that I've scratched my arms pretty badly.
"I- I'm so sorry?! Please I didn't mean to!"
"Sh sh it's okay"
"I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry!"
I keep repeating.
She holds me tightly and I eventually stop sobbing.
I wipe my tears and head to the bathroom.
I use the bathroom as Jane lingers whilst getting dressed.
I feel so sickly.
I get back into bed and I clutch my stomach.
"Baby- what's wrong?"
She questions as she crouches down.
"Pain- in stomach"
I start to sob.
"Where exactly baby?"
I roll over onto my back with great effort.
Tears fall as I point.
"That's where you fell onto"
I nod
"Okay okay baby deep breaths. I'm going to get Sandy"
"Please don't leave!"
I cry.
"Baby I'll only be a second"
She rushes off and I groan.
Sandy is there
"So you're having so pain?"
She questions.
"Uh huh. It hurts!"
"Okay okay sh deep breaths"
She takes me to the medic room and I collapse.
I come to on a bed
"What?-what happened?!"
"You fainted baby"
Jane is rubbing my forehead with a damp cloth.
"I- I'm in so much pain!?"
"You're in pain baby because you haven't eaten so now you have cramps."
"Ouch"
I cry as another one rips through me.
Sandy hands me a paracetamol and I take it.
I lie in the bed.
"You're gonna have to eat baby"
Jane comments as I cry.
I shake my head
"You have to eat"
Jane gets me a drink of water.
I take a sip.
Sandy brings me a salad.
I pick at it.
"Good job baby"
She tells me once she notices that I've eaten.
I smile lightly
"Are you daddy's little whore? Answer me!! Don't you dare cum without permission! Do you understand princess!"
He yells as he leans against the drawers.
I scream.
"Hey hey it's alright I'm here"
Jane gets onto the bed and she pulls me into an embrace
"It- it's all my fault!"
I sob.
"Baby you need to stop blaming yourself!"
"He's gonna punish me! You need to get me out of this place?!"
"Baby- baby deep breaths."
"You don't understand!!"
"Tell me baby then I'll understand!"
I shake my head rapidly.
"Come on! We have to leave!"
"Baby you can't go anywhere!"
"I'm fine now promise!"
I get out of the bed.
Jane follows me out of the room.
"Get back here baby, you know that you can't leave!"
"He's- he's gonna kill me- please don't let him!"
"I won't let him baby."
"I- I want to go home"
"Baby you're ill"
She looks at me with disappointment.
"I want to go home now!"
I sob.
"Sh sh I'll talk to Sandy come on"
She takes me back inside.
We go to Sandy's office.
I sob
"I need to go home"
"You're not eating at all at the moment Maura so I don't think it's a good idea?"
"But- I feel better now! I don't feel safe in here! I feel more safe in the comfort of my own home."
"I can only discharge you if you agree to attend sessions every week. Twice every week"
I nod.
"Do you want her to go home?"
She questions Jane
"Of course I do."
"Okay great. Go pack your stuff"
"Thank you so much"
I hug her out of happiness.
I hurry off with Jane.
"I'm so happy!"
"Me too baby"
We share a passionate kiss.
We pack all our stuff and we both sign forms.
"Can your ma pick us up?"
I question to Jane.
"Of course baby."
She calls her mother and her mother is so excited.
I can hear her happy screams over the phone.
An while later, she's there.
She immediately hugs me and kisses me on the cheek
"I'm so glad you're out Maura!"
"Me too Angela"
I smile as I go for a second hug.
She hugs me again then she shares a hug with Jane.
Jane and I sit in the back
We begin the long drive back.