Kianna Nicole
After the previous conversation I had with Kai, and some long, hard, thinking. I came to a realization that she was right. I did love Keon more then I loved myself, and that wasn't okay.
I did need to focus on myself, my future, and my family. Of course I'd love for Keon to be with me apart of my journey.. but I just don't know it that's the best decision to make at this time.
I decided I'm going to talk to him.. and see how he feels about it. I don't know how he'll react, but I won't know until I find out.
I pulled up outside of his house seeing his car sitting in the driveway. As I was about to get out of the car, I just began to cry.
At this moment, the feeling of guilt came over me. How could I tell the boy who literally pulled me out of misery from my fucked up family, comforted me when nobody else did, understood my emotions better then anyone else.. and now I'm here to tell him that we need a 'break'.
I felt like a horrible person. I just couldn't believe I was actually here, to break up with Keon. I just couldn't see it.
The feeling of euphoria, joy, comfort, elation, and pleasure he gave me. I just don't know if I'd be stable enough to go the rest of my life— or rather however long without receiving that feeling from him.
I sat there crying for a good 10 minutes straight, until I sucked up my tears, and exited my car.
I unlocked the door and walked in seeing him taking a home run inn pizza out the oven.
"Wassup girl" he said looking at me with a small smile happy to see me. I tried my best to hide my sad expression so he wouldn't get to questioning me.
"Hey" I said softly returning the smile as I removed my shoes.
"I got a surprise for u" he said walking over to me examining my face.
"Why it look like u was cryin?" He asked tilting my chin up to get a better look at my face.
"It's cold outside." I lied knowing he'd be able to tell
"Mhm" he said in a 'I know u lying but ima leave it alone' time.
"Look" he said tilting his neck and revealing a small red tattoo that said 'Kianna'.
"Keonnn " I said with the tears filling my eyes again.
"U like it?" He asked eager to hear my response
"Yes, I love it" I said forcing a smile to try and stop the tears.
"What's wrong bruh" he asked
"Nothing.. I been feeling real emotional lately." I said rubbing my head
"Mhm. U hungry? U can have some of this pizza.. I guess." He said glaring at me making me chuckle.
"Don't say it like that.. like somebody be greedy wit food cause that definitely be you." I replied walking over to the kitchen
This shit look good.
"I'll just make my own cause ima end up eating the whole thing" I said opening the freezer looking for another one.
"Where the other ones?" I asked frowning
"It was only 4." He said
"Right.. I haven't had any yet." I said getting frustrated
"Aw, my fault.." he said looking at me scratching his head
"U ate ALL FOUR?? And we literally JUST BOUGHT THE SHIT??" I yelled at him angrily
