About You. (Matty Healy)

22- How You Getting on with Your Life?

Thinking About You by Radiohead

"All the things you've got, she'll never need."

102 by The 1975

"I like the way that your face looks when you're yappin' on about him."

May 2019

It had been a week since Jade had drunkenly kissed Johnathan and called Matty. Her memories of confessing that she was still in love with Matty never returned, although she had a lingering sense that she had said something she likely regretted. Something was off between the two, a coefficiency of friction that couldn't be measured or solved. When Matty had Viola, Jade often called to say goodnight and check in on them both, the action of which would typically lead to conversations between the two parents. This week, it slowed down. Jade would ask him questions regarding work and play and the weather. Matty kept his answers brief and vague. His voice would be breathy and tight in its active defensiveness. The absence of his enthusiasm created the type of silence that followed behind abstract grief.  She tried not to overthink it, even though she felt like she was staring down a barrel of a gun. Even in their darkest winter days, his warmth was all she knew. To feel it fade felt like letting the skin of her bare arms be exposed to the ice-cold snow. 

Jade decided that it would be best if she didn't tell Matty about her date with Johnathan. Part of her felt like she had found a sneaky loophole in the agreement they had made with dating. Her biggest fear was blindsiding him. 

After a week of working closely next to each other, Olivia, Jade, and Johnathan had often gone out for drinks under the loose guise of celebration. It had been a fast-moving five days. They had auditions, castings, and production meetings that were hard not to be consumed by. Friday brought that all to a peaceful close and now Jade and Johnathan had some free time, allowing them to go on their date. Jade was nervous. Lines were about to be blurred and newly chartered maps would need to be navigated. It had been four years since she had endeavored on such adventures.  Seriousness and caution were essential items for the journey. When it came to love and dating before, in between, and after Matty, Jade's habits tended to be more futile. With the circumstances of her play alone, that was not an option.

Johnathan had asked Jade to a nice restaurant in Soho called Il Caminetto,  close to where most of their business was conducted. It was a nice Italian restaurant, with appropriately dim lighting and dark walls that forced a sense of intimacy. There was something about the atmosphere that seemed to persuade all its guests to have a glass of red wine. Matty had taken her there before. Their dinner was brief but memorable, so she worked best to see the evening with a fresh pair of eyes, ignoring any poltergeists that the building might host.

Jade had taken the tube, which was running a few minutes late. She walked into the restaurant at a quick pace, giving her a disheveled appearance despite the fact that she put in effort to look polished. She wore a brown silk dress and sheer-mauve lipstick. Her hair was brushed back into a high pony and she wore a pair of black high heels. It couldn't have been hard for Johnathan to notice her. At the moment of her entrance, her head and eyes moved against each other trying to spot him. The abruptness of her movement didn't pair well with the laissez-faire environment she had stepped into. Johnathan slowly and lightly waved for her from across the room, a soft and welcoming smile on his face. Jade had eventually caught sight of him. She approached their table in a somewhat shameful manner. "I'm so sorry I'm late. The train was behind."

Johnathan slowly stood up to greet her, "No worries at all, I practically just got here."

He opened his arms for a hug, which Jade took reluctantly. His arms wrapped around her waist and by default, her arms wrapped around his shoulders. Neither of them let it last too long. Johnathan pulled away.