UNINTENDED LOVE

Feelings...

Taehyung's POV:
I'm a heartless human being with no feelings- that's what people think about me because it's the way I act. I was the reason behind my parents getting divorced at least that's what they blamed me for. No one ever loved me in this entire world which contains billions of people. I wonder if anyone would even cry if I die someday, coz no one really cares about me. My existence had no meaning, no meaning at all until I met her. The only good thing that my father whom I do not consider to be my father had done is that he arranged my marriage with her, the person I love, the person with whom I want to spend the rest of my life with. I've been in a relationship before but I've got to know after my break up that the person I actually love is her and not just any mere girl.

She's the moon in my dark world. She's the one who can light up my world with her brightness, that world which had been in darkness since so long. I know it took me so much time to realise my feelings for her but the truth was I knew, I knew all along that I was in love with her but I didn't want to accept my feelings because I was afraid of going through the same pain I've gone through when Daisy left me. All the people I love left me which made me terrify at the idea of loving her. I even started to hang out with other girls in order to forget about her but I never crossed my limits. I acted as if I was in a relationship with them in front of her and everyone and I even wanted to see her jealous but she was never jealous. I just hanged out with them to avoid my feelings, But I knew I fucked up, I fucked up so hard that even when I didn't want to fall for her, I ended up falling so hard that even a small smile she gives makes my heartbeat faster than ever. Everything about her makes me crazy and I can't wait to get married to her but I'm scared. What if she doesn't love me?

What if she isn't willing to marry to me? All I want is her in my life. Ever since the only person I love, my mom left me saying that she got bored of their marriage after giving birth to me, my whole world shattered into pieces and I thought I wouldn't be able to arrange those shattered pieces again but she proved me wrong and did what I thought to be an impossible task. She made my dull heart light up with joy. Her little smile is enough to make my day because that's how important she is to me. I'm afraid, so afraid of losing her because of which I've become over protective which she might not like but I can't help it after losing all the precious things in my life, I can't help it but be overprotective about her because I don't want to lose her too.

Because if I lost her too, then I'll lose the reason of my smile, happiness, joy and most importantly I'll lose the reason of my existence. That's why I never allowed anyone to talk to her but ever since Jimin came, I started feeling insecure because she started being comfortable with him in no time which made me feel threatened. I know that she doesn't have that type of feelings for me but when she gets too close to him, my heart clenches. I even picked on him for no reason at all just because I was jealous of him, I was so jealous of him that I wished to be in his place when I saw her looking at him with a lovely gaze by which she never looked at me. But after knowing about him, I understood that he isn't a bad guy and infact was a pretty good guy which made him a friend of mine, to be honest my first friend other than the people who roam with me just because they want to be popular.

He wasn't one of them, he was popular too, after all he's an idol. But even after making friendship with him, I was threatened and I was afraid of him taking her heart. The way he looks at her says it all that he loves her too. His eyes expresses his love which she might not be able to see but me, as a person who loves her can clearly see the love in his eyes which he has only for her. He's cold to everyone except her just like me. I'm cold to everyone except her unlike her who's good to everyone, she's the purest soul anyone could ever see and her features are one of the reasons why I'm so madly in love with her. Her deep dark brown orbs make me drown in them and make me fall harder and harder for her everytime I look into her eyes.