This is practically a crackfic mixed with actual story from the roleplay and it's from a discord server I'm in that's for The Black Phone.
If I'm allowed I will post a link for the server!
(Also no idea if we will have every character in this)
"Ladies and gents, we're here today because Azul and Mackenzie have said to one another, 'Honey, I love you so much I've just gotta get the government involved!'" the preacher said.
"Seriously, though. Thank you all so much for joining us. Azul and Mackenzie have asked that this be a fun ceremony, so we're here to have a good time these next few minutes while we get this hitching done, then we'll all have even more fun when we get to the reception. This thing isn't gonna start itself, so let's get to it!" as the preacher yelled this everyone cheered out and were happily chatted while entering the wedding venue.
After everyone was seated and such "We hold marriage up as a tradition in this country, and we've debated over it a lot in the last few decades, but at the end of the day, why do we do it? I made the joke in the intro about loving each other so much we're going to get the government involved, but is that all it really is?" the preacher continued preaching onward "Of course not! It's a tradition, yes, but we change traditions all the time, and we keep the essence of those traditions alive in their new forms. So nowadays marriage isn't what it used to be when Ralph Kramden promised to knock his loving wife Alice "straight to the moon!" night after night in the fifties - Mackenzie you're definitely not allowed to do that. At all. And neither are you, Azul. Nobody is allowed to knock anybody straight to the moon, no matter how hairy things get. Ahh... There it is. The crux of why we do this marriage thing. Sure, it's a lot of work. Sure it takes a lot of compromise. But at the end of the day, when you're married, you've got someone to come home to. You've got someone who's promised to love you no matter how smelly your socks get, or no matter how bad your mood is, or no matter what the universe decided to drop on your head this week. And you've got someone to have spaghetti fights in the kitchen with. Someone to laugh at the same silly inside jokes with. After a while, you'll find you've even got someone you share a little inside language with. We do marriage because it helps to have someone around to walk through life with. Mackenzie, Azul, I can't think of two people more suited through life together than you. In the time we've gotten to know each other, you've certainly both made me smile, and I've seen that your marriage will be built on a foundation of love and trust, and that's the best shot any of us can give it. You'll need to depend on that foundation of trust and of love throughout your marriage. You'll need to be more patient than you've ever had to be before. You'll experience higher highs, and lower lows than ever before, but now you'll be in it together - for good. With that in mind, let's check some legal boxes, shall we? Mackenzie Do you take Azul to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love and comfort her for better or worse, in sickness and health, and reap any and all tax benefits for as long as you both shall live?" You can see brides maids dabbing their eyes with handkerchiefs to avoid ruining their makeup and some handing handkerchiefs to the crowd and kthers fanning some of thr older observers.
"Azul Do you take Mackenzie to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love and comfort her for better or worse, in sickness and health, and reap any and all tax benefits for as long as you both shall live?"
"I do" Azul/Billy said.
"Do you Mackenzie take Azul to be your lawfully wedded wife, to love and comfort her for better or worse, in sickness and health, and reap any and all tax benefits for as long as you both shall live?"
"I do" Mackenzie/Finney said.
"Okay, Mackenzie, now it's time to put a ring on it. Repeat after me, please. Azul I give you this ring as a symbol that I will love you, honor you, cherish you, and that I'll let you have the remote every once in a while, and I'll try to clean up after myself."
"Azul, te doy este anillo como símbolo de que te amaré, te honraré, te apreciaré, y que te dejaré tener el control remoto de vez en cuando, y trataré de limpiar después de mí mismo." Mackenzie/Finney repeated in a different language (i think- i ain't about to attempt translating)
"Alright, Azul, it's your turn. Repeat after me, please. Mackenzie, I give you this ring as a symbol that I will love you, honor you, cherish you, and that I'll try not to nag you about spending too much time with the gals, and I may even make you dinner once in a while."
"Mackenzie, I give you this ring as a symbol that I will love you, honor you, cherish you, and that I'll try not to nag you about spending too much time with the gals, and I may even make you dinner once in a while." Azul/Billy repeated.
"Well, after that touching exchange, I guess there's only one thing left to do, and that's for me to do my part! By the power vested in me by the state of North Carolina, I now pronounce you wife and wife!" the preacher exclaimed and everyone jumpedup and squealed as the two kissed and threw up little fake flowers and waved around their handkerchiefs.
~Da End~ ~Word Count: 951~
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