if love may win [heeseung]

four

Kim Yu-jin
01/09/20

"Jun-h-ho, I don't understand. How are you here? I watched you die," I struggled to get out as I felt the contents of this morning's breakfast make it's way up my throat.

"Well, you see Yu-jinah. Your first mistake was not finishing me off yourself and your second one was trusting that Heeseung to do it," I shuddered as he cut whispered in my ear.

I stepped back, trying to run and get away from this nightmare when he grabbed onto my wrist and pulled me towards him, engulfing me in a tight embrace. "Now, now. You can't run away from me, not now. Not when everyone is watching."

I tried to squeeze my way out but I couldn't because the son of a gun had a strong grip. So what do I do? I do what I do best. I sink my teeth into his arm, biting him and running away the moment the opportunity came.

I dashed through the hallway, entering the first room I find. I shut the door and lean my back against the door, temporarily hiding me from everyone and everything in the world.

Deep breaths, Yu-jin.

In through the nose. Out through the mouth. In through the nose. Out through the mouth.

When I finally felt all the air return to my lungs, I leave the room and make my way back to the cafeteria.

How is he alive?

I saw him die. We both did. None of this makes sense.

My mind is plagued with fear as the memories of that night play through my head.

"Jun-ho, let go of me. You're hurting me!" I cried out, a new jolt of pain shooting up my arm as Jun-ho pulled on my wrist. I was certain this was going to leave a new mark. Oh well. Nothing a little concealer can't fix, right?

"You're a little s/ut you know that?" He spat in my face as his grip tightened. "I saw the way he looks at you." 

"Jun-ho, I promise you. I don't know what you saw but it's nothing like that. I swear, Heedo is just a friend." I struggled to get out of his grip. He grabbed my other arm and pulled me up against him forcing me to look up at him, "DON'T LIE TO ME!"

I didn't even flinch. It's scary at first but after the fifth time, you'll get used to it. I lost count of how many times this happened. It was normal. I was used to it. It was a cycle. He accuses me. He hits me. He apologizes. I forgive him. And it repeats. It's a never ending cycle.

"Hey, what the f- are you doing? Get the f- off her." I search out the owner of the voice and to my surprise it's Heeseung. He throws a punch at Jun-ho and shoved him off me. I've never been more grateful to him than I have at this moment.

"Where the f- did you come from?" Jun-ho tried dodging Heeseung's punches but he failed. Heeseung kept on punching him until the only thing you could see was blood. If he didn't stop, he was going to kill him.

Isn't that what you want?

Is it? Yes. No. Maybe. I don't know.

No. Heeseung would go to jail. I can't let him do that. Even though I hate him, I won't let him throw his life away like that. I pull Heeseung away from Jun-ho, whose face isn't even recognizable anymore. "You could've killed him." I say as Heeseung wipes the blood from his face with his sleeve.

"Could've killed him. I was going to kill him. You should've been glad. This f-er doesn't deserve to live. Which f-ed up person hits women?" I could feel his piercing gaze on me as he tried to dig out the truth from my face.

"What I do to Yu-jin is not your f-ing business, Heeseung. So get that in your f-ing thick skull." This guy literally almost died and he got the f-ing audacity to speak like that to the guy who almost killed him. If anyone had a thick skull, it would be him. "Besides, she is a f-ing s/ut. Someone needs to put her right." At this point, his insults don't even hurt anymore. That's how common they were.

Taking one last look at Jun-ho and me, Heeseung turns around and starts to walk away. "Ya, where are you going? Get back here, the fight isn't over until I say it's over." Jun-ho calls out to Heeseung. Heeseung doesn't listen. He continues walking. "Ha, that's what I thought. You're such a pu55y, Heeseung." Jun-ho laughs to himself. Now Heeseung does turn around. Jun-ho gets up at the same time and walks towards him.

"What did you say?" Heeseung questioned him in a calm tone, not a hint of anger in his tone.

"I. Said. That. You. Are. A. Pussy. What now, are you deaf too?" Jun-ho doesn't know when to shut up. He is going to get himself killed.

Heeseung's calm exterior is replaced with anger. He punches Jun-ho right in the jaw. I'm certain I heard something crack. Jun-ho throws the next one and they continue taking turns punching one another. I run and stand in between the two of them trying to stop the fight but Jun-ho pushes me and I fall down hitting my head on the ground. Heeseung immediately stops fighting and makes his way towards me. "Hey, Yu-jinah. Are you ok? Can you hear me? Don't close your eyes."  He says, holding my face in his hands.

"He-he is behin-d yo-" I try to warn Heeseung but it was too late. Jun-ho came from behind and wrapped his hands around Heeseung, choking him. Heeseung struggles to get rid of his grip. He bites into Jun-ho's hand and Jun-ho immediately releases him, holding his injured hand. He runs to the door and tries to get away. Heeseung follows him but Jun-ho trips Heeseung, resulting in him falling down. Heeseung grabs his ankle as an attempt to stop him from getting away. Jun-ho tries to shake Heeseung's hand off but instead he falls down the stairs. Heeseung quickly gets up and goes to Jun-ho, checking for a pulse but he doesn't find one.

What did we just do?

Heeseung makes his way back to me, picking me up and supporting me with his arm. "He's dead. What are we going to do? What's going to happen now? What if people find out?" I panic.

"Don't worry, Yu-jin. I'll get rid of his body tonight. No one will find out. No one can find out. You must not tell a single person about tonight." His says, his voice shaky.

"I won't."

I don't ignore the shudder that rolls through me as I recall the memory of the night. I never told anyone what happened that night and Heeseung got rid of the body.

Well I thought he did. I guess he didn't.

My thoughts are interrupted when Hye-ri comes running to me.

"Hey, where have you been? It doesn't matter. You got to come and see this. There is a huge fight in the cafeteria," Hye-ri says, out of breath.

"What? Who is fighting?" I hear myself ask.

"Lee Heeseung and Jang Jun-ho."