we're so tired

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spring of 2017,
mentions of food

the pain was still very much present — the missing chunks of Mia's soul and spirit was felt throughout everyone closest to her, which had now significantly decreased in quantity. she only had the managers to go to, and JungKook. the boy that'd been by her side, though from a distance thanks to his growing boy group.

ever since her recovery period began, Jeon would make an even greater effort than before to try and see the girl, spending time with her as much as possible so she wouldn't be alone while the besties were busy with work and slowly finding stability within the company again. they'd set up a schedule, meeting once weekly or bi-weekly, depending on the boy's schedule.

the group had been slowly finishing the tracks for their upcoming album, yet Mia could feel Jeon's excitement growing less and less with each mention of the works. as if, they were just some random task they'd been forced into doing, like it wasn't the dream he'd worked towards and wasted his childhood away for.

the pair had agreed for their weekly date to be at their usual restaurant down the street from the company, the owners having grown to love the seven boys throughout their tough trainee days, eventually having come to love the five girls as well.

Mia left work at around 3pm, their meeting time set for 3:10. she slid on a mask, careful with her steps as the pain from the accident still held it's affects over her being. she breathed in the fresh spring, almost summer air, her lungs thanking the girl in return. she was quick to arrive at the small establishment, letting herself in with a greeting to the owners while heading straight to the pair's usual table.

"how are you, miss Ono?" the husband asked, Mia giving him her usual bright smile as she took off her mask. "i'm good, how about you?" her words were slow, and of course the male understood why. "better now that you two are coming," he smiled, placing down the small jugs of water and cups for the two. "the usual?" he asked, the girl nodding in response.

she only had to wait until 3:10 for the boy to arrive. his slim figure was visible from her peripheral vision, a small smile appearing on Mia's face. she turned to him, giving him a small wave as he bowed towards the owners, smiling his cute bunny smile at the girl as he approached the table.

"hi, little one," he greeted, fluffing her hair out of place, of course accompanied by a groan from the girl.

the name little one had become Mia's first nickname from Jeon. he decided calling her Misaki or Mia felt too formal and awkward — especially since they were eachother's closest friends. even though they were nearly the same height from the getgo, Jeon took pride in being her trustworthy oppa. so, naturally, the name had come naturally to the boy, and the girl was quick to accept it.

"hi, oppa," she smiled as he sat down, their food coming out immediately after. "thank you for the meal," they both said, quick to dig in as they hadn't taken a lunch break at work.

it was normal for Jeon to ask the girl if her bibimbap was yummy after her first bite, but he didn't. his head was lowered as he munched on the bowl of food, Mia finding his silence rather strange. she poured him a cup of the complementary water, the boy once again resorting to silence as he took a sip.

Mia softly frowned, wondering if their date was an inconvenience for the boy, also wondering if he had somewhere else to be.

as if their years of close friendship had granted him a mental alarm, Jeon looked up to see Mia's saddened face, swallowing the lump of food he'd shoved in his mouth out of desperation. he quickly realized what'd happened, and gently reached out to take her hand in his. "i'm sorry, i just-" he sighed, lowering his head in resentment.

"it's okay, oppa," she slowly spoke, the boy shaking his head in response. "there's so much going on, Mia.. so much,"

he never called her by her name. what was so terrible he had to call her by her name?

"i'm here for you," she stuttered her way through; he could feel the genuinity in her words.

Jeon sighed, still holding her soft hand in his, his finger drawing slow shapes on the backside of her palm in order to calm himself down, but also assure Mia she hadn't done anything to make him feel like this.

"i called my parents yesterday," he began, eyes trained on the table as Mia listened intently. "to tell them that," he paused, the words still feeling foreign to his own mind.

it'd been hard for the group to come to the unanimous decision, despite not wanting to throw away years of blood sweat and tears of not being liked in the industry— it was difficult to keep their heads afloat when all they received from the public was hate-filled words and threats.

"this might be the last album we make as a group."

ever since the accident Misaki had to take a moment to let the words she was told register in her mind, and then slowly translate with the small understanding she still had left. but, somehow, by some miracle — Mia was able to understand every single word at the exact moment Jeon had spoken them.

Mia looked distraught — she'd grown close with the members, however she cared more for how much Jeon loved his six older brothers. hearing these words hurt her heart.

"but.. why?"

he sighed, one that sounded as if he'd been holding it in the deepest trenches of his soul. "it's too much, Mia.. it's been years and we can't seem to appeal to anyone. people hate us for breathing, seniors and juniors i've looked up to since we debuted give me dirty looks when i bow to them," he sighed again, "we can't take it anymore. we're so tired."

♡♡♡♡♡,  完成!
+ inspired from the bts book spoilers on
twt the other day </3

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