13 - Back In Time

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"I never knew he played the guitar," Y/N exclaimed, her excitement making Sunghoon stop and give an are-you-serious look to Jay who shrugged, the smile never leaving his face. "And he's so good at it."

Harin nodded as she listened to Y/N. "I know, he used to be very good at it back in high school, he was just a big nerd and preferred to spend his time studying and reading comic books. It seems like he's kept up with his skills."

Across from them, Sunghoon and Jay were having one of their usual banters. "You, out of everyone, are smiling like a kid. What is going on?" He leaned against the counter, raising an eyebrow at Jay who shot him a playful glare. "Don't tell me-"

"Shut up." Jay shook his head in disbelief, trying to concentrate on making a new cocktail if not for Sunghoon 's persistent teasing. "Don't say it out loud, but I think you've got an idea."

"Oh shit." His eyes widened as realization hit him. "You're not serious, are you?"

"Yeah, Mr. Smarty Pants, I am. But that doesn't mean the world needs to know." He muttered, leaning down while his fingers deftly worked on mixing ingredients for the cocktail. "It's her."

"How is that even- what the hell?" He whisper-yelled, glancing at Y/N who was busy talking with Harin. "This is too perfect to be a coincidence, right? Did you sacrifice something to the world so it could line up this perfectly?" 

Jay shrugged nonchalantly. "I mean, I lost both my parents in a car accident. If it's not the universe finally giving me a break, I don't know what it is."

Sunghoon laughed awkwardly. "Damn bro, I hate your humor." Jay glanced at Y/N across the room with a smile on his face, making Sunghoon shake his head in mock exasperation. "But you do realize her boyfriend passed away a few months ago, right? This is somehow too uncanny."

Jay's fingers abruptly stopped. "How did you know about that?" 

"She told me." He muttered, taking out his phone before he went to Y/N's Instagram profile, showing Jay the pictures of her and Sungho. The cocktail was long forgotten when he scrolled through the photos, his expression turning more serious. "They seemed really happy together."

Jay sighed, his fingers lightly tracing the outline of Y/N's figure in one of the pictures. He had promised to make her smile and heal her heart and if she wasn't ready to move on yet, he'd be there for her as a friend, someone who listens, someone who understands.

Later that night, after being done with work, he sat in his bed and scrolled once more through her photos. It felt like an archive of her teenage years where she put anything and everything that made her smile. Flowers, cats, the sky, and when he scrolled to her posts back in the year he was her classmate, there was a picture of a letter that made him freeze. 

In the dim glow of his bedroom, Jay's heart skipped a beat as he gazed at the image of the letter Y/N had posted. It was a picture of a handwritten note, the words carefully penned in delicate cursive. The caption read, "If only my secret admirer knew how much this brightened my day."

His pulse quickened as he read the caption, a smile curling at the corners of his lips. It was the letter he wrote to her and hid in her locket early in the morning so that she would find it later. And he was indeed the "secret admirer" she had written about. The memories flooded back – the nervous excitement he had felt while writing the heartfelt words, the gentle thrill of placing the letter in her locket, and the hope that it would bring a smile to her face.

If only he had the courage to reveal his identity back then, to let her know that the feelings behind the letter were real and heartfelt. If only he hadn't let fear hold him back from expressing what he felt.

"Jay?" Y/N's voice made him throw his phone onto the bed in surprise. She leaned against the doorframe, slightly frowning.  

"Yeah?" Jay replied, his heart still racing from the surprise. He hadn't expected to hear her voice at this late hour. He quickly glanced at his phone, noticing the time – he had been lost in thoughts for longer than he realized.

"Couldn't sleep?" She walked to him with a soft smile, her gaze warm and curious. "You haven't been sleeping these days." 

"I could say the same about you. You should rest." He cleared his throat and made space for her on the bed, letting her sit next to him. "Do you need anything?"

"I need some company right now." She sighed softly, resting her head against his shoulder. "You can just tell me to go if I'm bothering you."

"No, no bother at all," He smiled. "I've always dreamed of being someone's emotional punching bag in the dead of night, you know?" He could feel her chuckle against his shoulder as she lifted her head slightly, her eyes meeting his. "What are you thinking about?" Jay's voice was always soft, but with her, it carried an even gentler tone, feeling like a warm embrace for her weary heart.

"Just... this and that," She muttered, her fingers playing with the fabric of her pajama pants. "I miss Seoul. Old Seoul, when I was still in high school. I miss it when I was young. I don't know why I'm thinking about this but I guess I'm feeling a bit nostalgic tonight."

"How were your high school years?" He asked, recalling the way she had fun with her friends in the hallways and the school backyard. He leaned back against the headboard of the bed, giving her his full attention.

A soft smile tugged at the corners of her lips. "Chaotic, but in the best way. I had the best of friends and the world seemed so big yet so small at the same time. We'd stay up late, talking about our dreams and fears, daring each other to do the silliest things. And no matter what happened, we believed that somehow, everything would work out in the end."

"Did you go to Daehan High?" He hesitantly asked before she sat up, her eyes widening in surprise.

"Yeah, how did you know?" She looked at him, wondering if there was something more to his question.

"I studied there for a year." He confessed with a nostalgic smile of his own. "After the accident when I went to live with my uncle. I... used to be your classmate."

Her eyes widened even further. "Wait, which year?" Her voice trailed off as she tried to piece the puzzle together.

Jay chuckled softly. "It was our sophomore year. I joined Daehan High a little bit late and I didn't really know many people. I doubt you would remember me. I was pretty quiet and kept to myself."

Her brows furrowed in concentration as she mentally retraced her steps through time, staring at him and scanning his features. "You were the new student who sat by the window in the second row?" His heart skipped a beat when he realized she was indeed remembering him. He nodded, making her put her hands over her mouth, eyes widening with surprise and delight. "You're the quiet guy who was always reading during break."

He smiled, his eyes slightly glistening. "I can't believe you remember me. I didn't even stay that long."

"How can I forget you?" She smiled softly, tilting her head to the side. "I still remember that day when you gave me the last strawberry milk that was left in the cafeteria vending machine. It was raining, and I was having a bad day."

Jay's eyes softened, his gaze fixed on her. "You remember that?"

"That meant a lot to me and I didn't get to thank you properly." She looked away, trying to hide her slight blush because the dim lighting couldn't completely hide her face. "How do you always manage to find me on my worst days and make them better?"

He smiled and reached out, gently tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "Maybe it's fate, or maybe you just have a way of drawing me in when you need someone by your side." 

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