my hand shook slightly as i tried to steady my breaths. i wasn't looking forward to hearing his voice, no i was. the dail tone rang loudly in my ear, i counted. one, two, thre- "brooke?" his voice nearly knocked the wind out of me. it was like i was living back in the moment we had our fight. "matt, it's me," was all i could come up with. i didn't particularly know what i had called him for, i only knew what i had wanted to tell him. he was nearly silent on the other end of the phone. "please, let me explain," my voice shook even though i didn't want it to.
"please do, we've been worried sick about you. do you know that i nearly thought you had been kidnapped or something worse? we were all freaking out, why would you just.. just leave?" he ranted clearly very distraught. "i'm sorry, i know that doesn't really make up for it, but i really am. i was being stupid, i thought i was helping even though now, i can see i was only hurting you." i paused to take a breath. "i took a flight to la and madi picked me up from the airport, i left a little after our fight," i explained hoping he wasn't completely furious with me.
"again, i'm sorry, i understand if you are upset with me... or even if you hate me," i tried to hold back the impending tears. "brooke, you have to understand that we had always planned to bring you with us where ever we would go, we never thought of you as a burden," he sighed heavily. "matt, i'm sorry," was all that i could say, i was at a loss. how could i have fucked things up this so badly? "i don't know why i did it, i thought i was helping," you could now probably hear the tears falling from my eyes.
i was gasping a little and sniffling. i felt like he wasn't going to forgive me, like i had taken it too far. his silence weighed heavily on my chest. "i'm just glad you're safe, i'm unbelievably upset though, honestly i'm just disappointed," there it was again, disappointed. he was disappointed in me like so many others had been. i was shocked by this, utterly frozen in my place. "disappointed?" i said like i was repeating it but it came out more of a question.
"brooke, i don't really know what to say, i really liked you but this whole thing is definitely making me see you differently," he spoke truthfully, it weighed on my heart heavily, he didn't love me, he was upset with me, and now he was seeing me differently. "okay matt, good to know, i don't know when i'll see you again but i hope that it's a long time from now because that is probably one of the most hurtful things anyone has ever said to me. i made a mistake, but i never though you would say something like that to me, i love you and what you said hurts," i took a shaky inhale.
"goodbye matt, i hope that everything in your life goes well," i hung up the phone before i could even hear a reply. i collapsed to the ground, i think i had been basically wailing because madi and laura had rushed out to come see what was wrong, i was so upset that i was nearly unresponsive. then i felt a sharp pain, in my stomach and in my lower back, i couldn't speak or move. then i realized my water had broken all over their front porch.
before i knew it i was at the hospital five hours later and had just given birth to my two beautiful girls, celeste and juno. madi and laura were with me the whole time. celeste was about three and a half minutes older than juno and they both came out with lots of hair. me and madi were laughing about it. i had told myself in my mind that i was done, i couldn't rely on my once best friends anymore, or matt. i had done this with madi and laura, so i would continue to do it without the three boys i had known all of my life.
i don't think i was prepared for what would ensue in the next year. i would finally get a place of my own. it wouldn't be too far from where madi lived, so she came over all the time, to see celeste and juno also to just help me out. we would also see each other when i was working because i woudl move up to be madi's manager, with the help of laura because i didn't fully know what to do at first. i woudl get back in touch with parker nearly a year after i had left school without a word. i never ever went back for graduation.
parker had changed a lot so i had ended up allowing him to see the girls once a month. i was clear that i was still going to be their sole guardian. the hardest thing i think i would even have to come to terms with was not seeing nick, matt, or chris for a year and a half. when i had finally been contacted by chris, we started talking again. it was like i had never left in the first place. we talked about everything i had missed from their lives. the. i started to facetime with nick and chris.
they would talk to me lots because when we got back in touch we couldn't hang out due to the tour they were on around the u.s. madi and laura went with them so that was how i knew. i told them that they could meet celeste and juno when they got back. i never heard from matt during that time. i think what i had said, what he had said it was all too painful for him to talk to me. some part of me hope we could try again. we never did get to really be together. i did cry about that most nights. i felt wracked with guilt for what i had said in the heat of the moment.
i hoped one day he may forgive me. i hoped one day i could really tell him just how much i loved him, that i hadn't stopped since the moment i first saw him, and that nothing would ever change just how much my heart felt for him. to my dismay, i saw that he had gotten a girlfriend. he had been with her for months now. he seemed to really be in love with her, looking at all the picture really did hurt me. it hurt me to my core. i didn't know if it was actually possible for a heart to break but mine did, in the moment. i gave up, i gave up my dreams of him nearly ever night, i gave up the hope that those dreams would be real, i let go.
i no longer believed that two people could be soulmates, because mine was with another woman. the man that i would forever be tied to did not love me anymore, if he ever did in the first place. it was impossible for me to fall out of love with him, or even be with someone else. it was like i wasn't allowed, like i was tied to his invisible hook, he would never let me go. so i let it go, i let my thoughts of him fall second to all of my work, all of my parenting, everything. i forgot about the boy i would always love, i forgot about matthew sturniolo.
brooke's corner ⭐️
crying in the club over here like legit making my own self cry while writing this comment your thoughts and vote if you're enjoying it 💋 sorry i got a little lazy at the end there lol lowk how do y'all feel about like a major time skip? would you like that??
