Arrow : Shado of the Past

Saints and Sinners

Rage...its a tool used for what little it's worth. But it consumes me in this very minute. I want to do nothing more than tear Ivo limb from limb for what he's done to Shado to Sara to SLADE! But that's not what's important right now...

All my life, I've been nothing but a failure serving my desires over others' needs. It's...pathetic.

When I first washed up on Lian Yu, I swore to myself I would right my fathers wrongs and return and save Starling city once and for all. But honestly, I was never going to get there. I mean, somewhere out there in the stars above, maybe there's a world where people actually liked Oliver Queen. Where I was seen as more than a party boy and billionaire bitch. Maybe i would be seen as a hero, a man who changed or maybe a lover even. But that's not how reality is. I'm not strong enough to do anything, let alone fight for a city and its people. I couldn't...I couldn't save Slade...but Shado and Sara are here right now...they need a saviour and maybe just maybe Shado can remember me as more than what I was maybe she can love me as much as I love her.

Time passed as my torn clothes met the ground, and my bloody hands collapsed into the soil bellow. Please not like this. Let them leave. Let them live, let HER LIVE.

Ivo glanced around at the trio of us. Sara was sobbing...its my fault she's here. She's only here because of my insecurities, my fears...its all my damn fault.

I puffed out a weary breath, blood on the tip of my tongue. I fixed my gaze toward Shado, who sat opposite me and Sara. She was as graceful as ever, though fear stood on the edge of her tongue, and pain rested behind her head. I wish I could take all that away but...I won't have time to, I know that...

"Mr Queen," Chirped Doctor Ivo, his tone as snake like as ever.

"Choose"

That simple word had shown me the end the way everything in my life till this moment had come together. A choice is what sparks everything... but sometimes people make the wrong choice, I know because that's all I've done my whole life.

I look into Shados' eyes, that fear had burst out of its bubble in the form of salty tears in the edges of her eyes and her hands trembling at her sides.

I could tell all I needed to from that moment. She was about to make the wrong choice. So I made it for her.

My rough and bloody and bruised and broken hands grasped Ivos' neck in an instant.

"What the hell are you doing!" Pleaded Ivo, yet my response was simple. Making the right choice. I spoke the words to no one. I simply uttered them through my pupils to Shados as I gazed on at her. I knew she got the message.

I closed my eyes for the final time. I'd never see Speedy again or mom or laurel or Tommy even Malcolm, but I'd maybe see my dad again. After all, we were both headed to the same firey aftermath. But for Shado, someone who deserved better and should live in the light...I loved her, love her. Forever till I find her again.

That is my choice.

*BANG!*