A Bang and a Whimper

6

The evening after Jenna's visit, Thor arrives with flowers to replace the wilted ones in Loki's room. He is happy. Jenna was beaming for hours after her conversation with Loki and she chattered on and on about how excited she was to finally meet him. Thor hopes Loki was equally enthralled by his daughter.

He settles down beside his brother and taps lightly on the top of his book, "I know you are aware of my presence. I heard your irritated sigh as I entered the room."

"Of course I am, you oaf. But this page will not complete itself and the dwarves have just brought in the printing press."

"Have you not read that book at least a dozen times?"

"Hush and let me finish the page, Thor." Thor does as he is instructed. This is the Loki he remembers from long ago- irate at having reading interrupted. "Now. Hello, Thor."

"Hello, Loki."

"You have a daughter."

"Yes, I do."

"She is absolutely charming."

"That she is. And she is delighted to have finally met you."

"She is?"

"Yes. For years she has heard stories of her clever uncle who could charm his way out of any mischief and had a knack for magic and mayhem alike. Why would she not be?"

"Because I would not be delighted to meet me."

"That is because you think too harshly of yourself."

"I imprisoned-" Thor cuts him short.

"Imprisoning Father and stealing the throne is not why you loathe yourself. Be truthful, Brother. You are proud of that feat, as you ought to be. Though I would not say that aloud near him. But it is where you were born that vexes you."

"Do not think I do not feel as though I have made many mistakes. Trying to kill you after discovering my roots was a bit of an overreaction."

"Only a bit?"

"Compared to trying to take over Midgard, yes."

"True. That was not a wise decision."

"There are dark things in the universe, Thor. What is in the void is not kind. And it poisoned me further. Your books have helped clarify some of my thoughts."

"Jane would be glad to have helped."

"Jenna said it was she who thought to tell me of Frigga's death."

"She did. She once told me she regretted not insisting that I order the guard to take her to you so she could sit beside you and tell you herself."

"She would have slapped me first, of course."

"Likely. She also told me that she felt, as the only Midgardian to get to face you in such a way, she was obligated to do such. But also willing to forgive it by trusting you."

"As I told your daughter, she was utterly remarkable."

"I wish you could have known her. I believe you would have enjoyed her company."

"Well I was too busy playing Odin at the time. One more mistake...." He sets the book aside, leans back on the pillows, and then furrows his brow as something new occurs to him, "If you were here with Jane and Jenna while I was on the throne as Odin, you did not seek to tell your own father that you had a child."

"Correct."

"Why would you not tell him?"

"Because I did not want his prejudice against Midgard to taint his impression of her."

"But there would have been years for him...me...to get to know her, and to know Jane. I still do not understand. Does he not still hold the same prejudices?"

"Oh, he does...but I suspected that something was wrong when I returned here with my family. There were things you did that were not quite like Father and I did not know what was happening. I thought perhaps you were in control of him, as you has been in control of men in Midgard. But I could not be certain, as I also thought I saw you die, and so I thought it best to keep her hidden and safe."

"You thought I might harm her?" Loki is slightly hurt.

"I did not know what you would do," Thor says as he rests one of his hands over one of Loki's, "You had so much hatred for me after Midgard, even during our quest for vengeance. I have hoped for years that you still carried me close somewhere deep in your heart, but I could not know. And since I did not know, and I did not know what lengths you would go to harm me if you were behind the oddities in the Throne, I did not wish to risk my daughter."

"Do you fear me now?"

Thor searches his face for his intentions and finds only worry, "No. I am hesitant to trust you, but I do not fear you. We are rebuilding."

Loki is relieved and sighs, "Thank goodness. I have had enough of fear."

"As have I. And yet I think we both slightly fear the same person."

"You? Fear Odin? Why?"

"Think for a moment on what I have told you."

It dawns on him, "You have not told Odin who Jenna's mother was."

"Aye. He first met her upon my return from adventuring after Jane's death. I introduced her as my daughter, nothing else."

"She recounts that as a terrifying experience."

"He was in one of his moods."

Loki laughs, "His moods? She described him as being in a rage about my theft of the throne. I hardly would call that a 'mood'!"

"Perhaps I understated myself. He was quite angry."

"And yet you left her with him to come find me."

"He calmed when he saw her. Father has always had a soft spot for children. Even for you."

"Jenna said she thought that he tempered his want to kill me because she reminded him so much of both of us as children."

"She is a perceptive child. Father has remarked time and time again that she looks so much like I did."

"She is a beautiful girl, Thor. The court will seek to devour her."

"And that is why I have not introduced her to them."

"How will you answer their questions about her mother."

"The same as I have answered Father's. I have ignored them."

"That will not work forever."

"I know. But I do not want them to treat her terribly because her mother was of Midgard."

Loki pauses, thinking, "Wait."

"What?"

"Wait. Wait until I can stand beside you as you introduce her. The court remembers my retributions for their cruelty towards us as children. I will pledge to her my skills with knives and magic until she is able to wield both herself. They will not touch her."

Thor hugs Loki, "You will do this? Honestly?"

"I would ask if I have ever lied to you, but the answer would be 'often', so I cannot...but for her, I give you my word, not as Loki the trickster, but as Loki, once king, and reportedly not a terrible one."

"Protector of the Nine."

"And of Asgard's princess."

"I think, Brother, that may be your most noble endeavour yet."

Loki smiles, then gently shoves him back, "Thank you. Now go to your supper so that I might finish this book. I like how it ends."

"Is that the one with the potato?"

"Yes. And Death."

"I like how it ends, too." Thor leaves the room and Loki retrieves his book, flips to his page, and retreats into the fantastic. He is only somewhat sure that he can live up to the task he has just set up for himself, and reading about a vampire photographer and a war of the printing presses seems like a good way to temper the rising panic that he will somehow fail.