A Bang and a Whimper

10

Thor and Jenna leave Loki's quarters for supper. Odin meets them in the dining hall.

"You were with him again this afternoon, were you not?"

Jenna nods, "Yes. I had a story I needed to hear. Father reads them well, but Uncle reads them better."

"And what stories might those be?"

Jenna is careful with her words, "Ones my mother left me."

Thor sighs wistfully. Jenna lowers her eyes. This is part of the act they put on to keep Odin from asking questions. When Thor returned from adventuring with Jenna, Odin's rage was so intense that Thor feared telling him anything of his life with Jane. Their time together had been hidden from view, the scientists she worked with knowing only that she was under the protection of the prince and, as a guest, was living in the king's cottage on the edge of the royal hunting ground. The hunting ground was walled from the city, and no one dared to intrude. Jane told her colleagues she had requested to live there so she could observe the stars away from the city lights. No one had asked any other questions. Keeping their relationship from Odin had not been difficult then, nor was it now.

When Thor had found his father raging against Loki, calling for vengeance. he had kept Jenna behind him until his father was calm enough to notice he was in the room. Then he had introduced his daughter, noting only that her mother had recently died. Jenna had genuinely cried at the reminder. She looked so much like her father and her grandmother. Odin had been struck by her eyes, so much like Frigga's. When Thor finally was able to piece together what had happened, he asked Odin to watch the girl while he was gone. Odin obliged without question. Out of courtesy to her, he had not asked Jenna questions during her father's absence. In the past months, he had been attempting to find out more of her parentage, but to no avail. Even Sif and the Three had said avoided his questions. They said Thor had kept his private life very private after he returned from stopping the destruction of all things during the Convergence. It wasn't really a lie.

And that is where Odin's memory ends- he remembers Jane, Loki, and Thor going to Svartalfheim. He was told of that. But he knows nothing of what happened on that barren land, and word never reached him as to what happened in Midgard, either. Heimdall told him that there was a battle, and that Thor defeated Malekith, but when he asks of the Midgardian, Heimdall is silent. Odin assumes that she likely died. No being as fragile as a Midgardian could survive the Aether.

He has put together some of what Loki did on the throne. Thor has told him of Thanos and the Infinity Stones. Odin thinks Loki is an idiot for giving away anything from the vaults for any reason, even preservation of himself. But Thor downplays this every time the subject comes up. It only somewhat works to stop the impending rant.

So at supper, he lets the conversation about Jenna's mother end, "Ah. Those stories. And does your uncle enjoy reading them?" His voice hesitates on "uncle"- he still does not approve of Thor taking Loki back into the family so readily.

"Yes. He does. The stories and company brighten his day considerably."

"Be careful, Jenna. He is a master of manipulation."

"And I ask no more of him than to read stories."

Odin turns to Thor, "Do not leave them alone."

"Loki will not hurt Jenna. He has sworn to protect her, Father."

"And his word is worth less than a cesspit to me, Thor. You know this. And you know why."

"I do. And I think it an unfair judgement, but your experience is your own to base your interactions with him on. I only ask that you allow for change in him. He spent so little time ruled by his anger out of the span of his life."

"It is the scale of the thing, Thor. I wish I could understand why he has done what he has done. I want to speak to him."

"Can you hold your temper, Father?" It is a question Thor would not have asked years ago when his father was king and strong. But Odin stands less tall than he once did, a slope edging into his spine as he reaches his last years.

"I do not know."

"Then you will not visit. Not yet. He still thinks the worst of you in some ways, and I do not wish you to reinforce that and destroy all the progress he has made."

"And you think me incapable of being reasonable."

Thor shakes his head, "No. I think you still hurt to badly to listen to him. So a conversation would be meaningless."

"And what about him?"

"For a short time, he was king. It has changed his understanding."

"That does not make him reasonable."

Jenna sits quietly and listens to them argue. She hates these conversations. She finishes her supper quickly and asks to be excused. Her father grants her this and she flees the room with Odin calling after her not to visit her uncle alone. She goes to the chambers she now shares with her father and goes to the room where her mother's belongings are stored. She finds the battered jeans jacket hanging on the footboard of the bed and slips it on. It is too big, but she does not care. She huddles down below the window next to the telescope and cries. Keeping the secret from her grandfather is work she does not like doing. She has talked to her father, but he thinks that Odin will only bring old prejudices to their relationship if he does not first know Jenna well. Because of this, she feels like she has a connection to her uncle- she does not belong in Odin's version of Asgard. While she likes that her father, as king, can change things, and is working to make the realm more open, she knows there are others like her grandfather in positions of power. Her title and parentage will protect her, but that is little reassurance. She does not want to be left alone because someone fears her father. There are may days she wishes they still lived in the cottage surrounded by trees with the stars bright in the dark of night.

She does not bother to stand up, but crawls over to the bookcase. The lower shelf is filled with children's books. She selects one of her favourites- "Oh the Places You'll Go!"- and reads it out loud. She does not quite like how it sounds. There is something wrong with her cadence. So she starts again, thinking about how Loki reads, and how her mother read. And then she reads it again. Then she sadly puts it back on the shelf and settles down on the bed. She tucks her hand under the pillow and rests it on something cold. A prestigious award her mother had won in Midgard for contributions to science. It has been under the pillow since it was moved from the cottage. Jenna put it there. She falls asleep as it warms to her touch, a reminder and a comfort.