Late Night Thoughts

Things I Needed to Get Through my Head

A MONTH AND SOMETHING POST BREAK UP

"Popcorn and movies tonight?" Jack asks cheerfully.

"Haven't eaten popcorn since the fucker," I declare. "He ate some at least twice a day and in result, so did I. It's kinda dulled out my taste buds and I can't eat any without swallowing a mouth full of poison."

"Listen, Max, you can't stay hung up on him forever. Sometimes, it's best to find yourself within solitude. Find yourself while listening to a new music genre. Find yourself as you blast your favorite artist on a school night while home alone. Find yourself within your emotion towards the dwindling leaves during a three hour hike you chose to take alone. Find yourself within your thoughts during sunsets. Find your voice and belch it out while in the shower. Find yourself within photographs; take pictures of things that make you smile, whether it's your Vans or that tasty ice cream cone you've been craving for months. Find yourself within the poetry you write and how it makes you feel. Find yourself on a Sunday night once finally completing your essay. Find yourself on an early morning in a coffee shop. Find yourself at a family party, simply observing the giggles of toddlers and stories shared within the eldest. Find yourself until you're content and if you're not, address this whilst finding yourself. Smile as wide as a four year old would when trying to display their lost tooth. Be passionate, affectionate. Do not let things go unnoticed. Know that you're more than that A+ and a size 5 and a 34C. You are the world; as powerful as asteroids, bright like the sun, as mysterious as the moon, as impulsive as the comets and as young as the stars. You don't need a boy to promise you these, as you are already them. So for Christ's sake, eat some fucking popcorn and enjoy every second of it."

"Jack, I actually love you."

"Love you too, cutie."