Save Me...SOLBY

•Part 21•

Sam's POV

I was so tired for no reason and we have school today which pissed me off even more. Now I'm not one to be pissed off much but today just wasn't the day.

I looked to my left and saw Colby sleeping peacefully then I checked the time 2:25?! I threw myself back onto my pillow with my hands over my face. I made sure i didn't wake Colby up seriously why do I keep waking up so early...

I tried to force myself back to sleep but it really wasn't working then Colby woke up. "Sam? Are you okay...?" He asked sitting up and rubbing his eyes "Yeah sorry..." I said.

He looked at the time then pulled me closer to his chest. "C'mon go back to sleep we're not going in today okay? We'll visit my mom" he said placing his chin on my head.

I nodded and just thought about how close Colby actually was to me...if I was this close to Katrina I would've been beaten to death. "Sam I'm serious please get some sleep..." Colby said wrapping his arm around my waist.

I was glad he said we're not going in today I really didn't want to. My brain was running and it just wouldn't shut off. I heard Colby sigh and he sounded annoyed, "sorry..." I muttered moving out of his grip.

He stayed laying down and looked at me. My eyes started getting watery so I played it off as something was in my eye. "Sam..." he said which scared me Because he would normally call me 'love' or something. I nodded "What's wrong?" He asked holding my hand I didn't know what to say.

"Nothing I'm fine sorry..." fuck I always say the wrong things. Then Colby turned his back to me and I just looked at him and slowly got out of bed.

You idiot
You made him mad
He was the only one who actually cared
You fuck everything up
You should just kill yourself
He hates you
Your not good enough for him
He's faking.

I didn't know what to do at this point I just walked downstairs and sat on the kitchen floor. I don't know why...oh yeah I do. Katrina would usually say that I had to sit on the floor because I'm an animal and animals don't deserve love.

I sat on the floor shaking and everything was blurry I was so scared. I don't know why...what if Colby does hate me? What if he wants to break up?

Just then he came downstairs. "Love..." he said as he sat down next to me,I moved away. "Please..." he said holding out his hand,I placed my hand into his and he brought me closer.

"I'm not mad at you,I don't hate you,I don't want to break up. I love you very much and I hope to be with you for the rest of my life." He said. It calmed me down him saying that.

"Now go get ready my love and we'll go see my mom okay?" He said I nodded as I walked upstairs and picked out my clothes. I got changed and got myself ready then went downstairs to Colby eating.

"You look stunning my love" he complimented but in reality my outfit was just a pair of grey jeans and a oversized sweater. He finished eating and went to get ready. I thought about how confident Colby is and I would give anything to have even a little bit of confidence.

But no. Instead I care way to much about how I look and what I eat. Eating...I barely do that oh well no one knows so.

Colby soon came down and he look effortlessly handsome. I didn't want to say anything just in case I made him feel uncomfortable but I just smile a little.

He slipped his hand into mine and walked me to the car. He opened the door for me and then got in the drivers seat,I smiled at him I could not stop smiling.

Am I that in love with him? What if all of this is fake? What if he don't actually love me? What if he secretly hates me? What if this is just a game? What if-

I was cut out of my thoughts by Colby's hands being brought to my thigh. It felt calming but it's the trauma that came with it...

We soon arrived and Colby walked us to the door then his mom came into frame. "Omg boys come in come in" his mom said smiling,Colby walked in first then I followed him.

Colby's house feels so safe to me way safer than my house. We all sat at the table and I just sat there zoning out. Colby slipped his hand onto my knee and I flushed a red colour. "Boyssss" his mom said smirking Colby just laughed.

I placed my head on the table and just smiled. "Sam dear? Do you need any water or anything?" I was about to say no but then "Mom could you make him some toast please?" Colby asked I just looked at him.

"Sure love" she said going to make it. "Sam...please" he said holding my hands I couldn't say anything...I don't want to eat "But..." I started trying to say something but it wasn't working.

Colby's mom came back and placed the plate on the table. They started talking and I just stared at the food it looked sickening...

"Dear would you like to eat in Colby's room? It make might you feel less anxious" she suggested which I questioned how did she know...? Colby better not be telling her I didn't even want anyone to know.

I don't want to throw up. I hate throwing up it's sickening. "Love...please eat a little your on the verge of passing out I can see that" Colby begged I really didn't want to make him mad but I couldn't eat...

"Okay...if you don't want to eat right now can you please try and eat later...?" Colby asked I just nodded. He ate the toast then placed his hand on my knee, "Sam if this carries on I'm gonna get you to talk to someone because from what I'm witnessing you might have an eating disorder..." he said.

Is he okay? Eating disorders don't exist just like Katrina said I'm just asking for attention. "A-what...?" I said he just hugged me "You struggle to even look at food love...I'm really concerned every since you got with Katrina your confidence went down and so did your life...I've seen your arms" he said. 

I started shaking and I didn't know what to do "No no my dear please calm down...your gonna be okay I'm just worried and I want you to know that I'm always going to be here for you no matter what" he told me planting a kiss on my forehead.

Colby's POV

Sam fell asleep and I'm being serious I was so scared about his health and everything. I knew something was going on in their relationship but I promise to fix his heart and never let it break again.

His arms...I was so broken when I saw what he did to himself he don't deserve that no one does and it's unfair...I just hugged him tighter I never wanted to let go of him he's so precious...

My mom soon came up and when she saw Sam asleep she just smiled. "Take care of him Colby...you know he's the one" she said I nodded as a smile appeared on my face.

My mom walked over to Sam and just looked at him "He really is special" she said "I know" I said agreeing. "And I'm never going to hurt him" I said looking up at her she just smiled.

"I know you won't I raised you well enough. You get sone sleep please dear I love you" she said "I love you to mom goodnight" I said as she left.

I cuddled up with Sam and fell asleep

Hey sorry guys I'm really tired and I'm sick so I'll try to do better next time <3