Addicted to you (W2S)

'I'll protect you.'

(Harry's pov)
I looked about the room, my legs pulled to my chest as I sat on my bedroom floor. It was messy.. really messy. I had empty bottles (water and other) random plates, scattered wrappers and dirty washing everywhere. It looked a wreck. It was a wreck.

Sadie used to stay over every night so I'd have to clean. Now there was no point. The only person who would see it apart from me was Cal. The other boys hadn't been over since the breakup. I just couldn't bring myself to invite them. Invite them without her.

My thoughts were clouded and my vision was blurred with tears threatening to escape. I needed to move on. It was the only way to get rid of this shit mentality. But I couldn't. I couldn't imagine life without her. I couldn't imagine marrying anyone except her.

She was my everything and I'd fucked it all up. With a simple comment. Our relationship had always been a bit toxic. She was insecure of herself, constantly insisting that she didn't deserve me. That she was "too ugly" or not skinny enough. I'd never understood it. I never saw her like that. I'd always been a little jealous. Convinced that she was too close to someone. Or that she hadn't told me she was out so I'd get myself in a state about the thought of her cheating.

It was stupid. Both of us stuck in our own delusions and projecting onto each other. I'd gotten better at controlling it. Seeing the full story before freaking out. Yet she had never lost those insecurities. Her mind was filled with twisted words constantly about herself.

Now here I was. Without her and more jealous and upset than I had been since the breakup. I was never good at taking a hint. Cal had talked about going to a restaurant with Lux which they had both got their eye on. He had discussed it for ages and would randomly mention how they had accidentally booked for 3 and would need to find someone willing to join them.

After days of Cal making painfully obvious hints and me still not getting it, he eventually just asked me to go with them.

'Did you seriously think we would pay for 3 people and not notice?' Cal laughed and took a sip of his drink.

'Never thought about it like that I guess,' I laughed but it was pretty forced. Cal clocked it immediately and looked over at me.

'Whats bothering you mate?' He questioned me suspiciously, 'is it Sadie again?' He sighed.

'I don't know how to even start moving on.' I placed my head in my hands.

'You just need to take your time.' He patted my back. 'When was the last time you even tried to flirt with a girl?'

'Sadie.' I laughed and took a swig of my beer.

'You need to try and move on. Don't do it for Sadie. Do it for yourself Harry.' I nodded and stood up.

'I gotta start stream.' I walked into my room.

A little while into the stream and I wasn't feeling any better. My head was still being bothered by the thought of her. I looked up from my phone and peaked at the chat.

'What do you think about Sadie and max?'
'Can't believe she went back to Max..'
'U ok Harry?'
'You look so tired.. take some take off'
'Sadie deserves better'
'Bet u cheated on her'
'I swear Max was abusive? Didn't they say on stream'
'LOVE U HARRYYY'
'this stream is dull'
'We love u harry'
'I miss Sadie being on stream so much :('

I laughed annoyedly at the amount of comments about her. Could they not let us both live? How obsessed could they all be.

'I'm not going to address Sadie being in a relationship again. Let us both live. It's her choice.' I scoffed at the camera before continuing the stream. I clearly wasn't in a great mood!