A Mystery's Knowledge

26- Yours & Mine

Warnings: Em goes a little crazy, drinking, swearing, mention/ thought of suicide, smoking

Emma's P.O.V

I couldn't get it out of my mind.

Avery's face. Xander's face. Jamie's face. Gray's face.

Gray's face.

Oh god, he must be so disappointed.

He knows what I wanted to do, how absolutely weak I am. Oh god, he must hate me so much. They all probably hate me and think I'm just some baby who can't handle life. 

I need a smoke.

I need a drink.

I need clarity.

I need-

I burst into the cellar, Jameson's personal one, and grabbed a bag that had been thrown haphazardly on the floor. He probably used it to transport all the drinks in there, just as I was using it to bring them out. I grabbed a smoke from deep within my pockets, only half ashamed while I was lighting it.

As soon as the bag and my arms were full, I made my way to the rooftop. There were a number of ways to access different portions of the roof, so I was hoping I had some time before someone found me.

Before he found me.

Oh god.

What would he think?

That I'm crazy? Surely he'll think that. 

I need a drink.

I threw the smoke down, immediately chugging a bottle.

He'll be so disappointed. 

Another bottle. And another. 

God, why did I stop drinking?

He'll think I'm a coward.

That one got to me the most. I needed another drink. 

So, after finishing one two three four five six more bottles and drowning myself in both misery and alcohol, something occurred.

Cowards deserve to die.

I laughed, twirling my way to the edge of the roof. Two bottles in hand, how many would this be? Eh, who freaking cares.

One step two step three large steps closer to the edge, till I could lean and fall. Who doesn't love being drunk and high? 

"You're going to hurt yourself!" I laughed and laughed and laughed. I dropped my one now empty bottle. Whoops.

"Cowards deserve to die" I was swaying. God, if I just tilted over a little mor-

He pulled me away from the edge. Into his embrace, "Who called you a coward?"

"Well, wasn't it you? No, I suppose it wouldn't be. You would have been angrier if yo'd been the one to'ay it, huh. But either way, I can't be wrong 'bout tis"

He laughed. God forbid, he laughed. "You're silly, y'know that right? I'm glad you're not dead. I love you Em, I would never wish death upon you"

Em.

Em Em Em Em Em Em Em

Grayson's P.O.V

She was in quite the shock I said her name.

Em.

It felt nice to say.

"Woaaaahhh there mister, I'm taken y'know. 'is name's Gray an he's kin'a mean and scary" She was definitely wasted, but still kinda cute.

"Baby, I am yours. And you're my girl" I couldn't help but smile at that.

"Y'sure 'bout that? Let me find out" 

She kissed me. She actually kissed me. I mean, I shouldn't be surprised, but she kissed me.

"Never mind, you're definitely him" She melted into my arms and I picked her up to craddle into my chest.

Soon enough, she was fast asleep, clutching at my shirt.

Maybe I should stay up here, she likes being outside. I turned to make my way further off the roof when I heard an unmistakable click. 

I jumped away right as a bullet went by, running towards the stairwell. She stirred in my arms, "Gray, baby, are you alright? What's happening?" I wouldn't worry her now, she needed her rest.

"It's alright baby, everything's fine, you're fine, I'm fine. You should go back to sleep" I spoke softly, hoping not to freak her out. I made my way down the stairs as she- slightly unwillingly- lay back down and closed her eyes. 

I passed by Jameson, giving him a look and a nod.

He knew what I meant. We need to talk. Asap.