Forget-me-not

Seungmin

Seungmin's world collapsed the moment Changbin told him he needed to get to the hospital. His heart dropped straight into his stomach and his brain went into overdrive. He shoved Han off his lap and onto the floor. Han was in his own little world of shock when the cold hard floor knocked him out of it. 

Seungmin's lungs caved in. Invisible hands came down and began squeezing them. He couldn't breathe properly. All he could do was picture Cynthia's face. The glittery spring green eyes and the deep dimples carved into each side of her face. Her up-turned nose laid with a faint dusting of freckles. You couldn't see them unless you were up close to her face. 

God, no. Please, no. Not Cynthia. 

He didn't remember the drive there. He was barely aware of Chan's hand on his shoulder as Chan led him to the nurse's station and explained the situation to the nurse behind the desk. Another nurse came out in scrubs and led him towards her room. Chan stayed back in the waiting room with a frown. His eyes didn't leave Seungmin's back until he and the nurse rounded the corner. 

Seungmin hated hospitals. Ever since he was a kid, he hated everything about them. The poking and prodding of doctors, the scent of disinfectant, the bland neutral colors. He hated staying still and he hated waiting to heal. He tried his best to stay far away from them up until now. 

The nurse spoke softly and explained Cynthia's situation. Seungmin heard her voice, but none of her words were registering with him. His thoughts were frantic and they spilled over one another. Clearly, Cynthia was alive because if she wasn't, he wouldn't be being led to her hospital room. 

"I have to warn you," the nurse glanced over at Seungmin, "she's in rough shape." 

"But is she okay?" 

"Right now, she's in a stable condition. We're checking on her regularly and, other than being unconscious, she's okay. Besides her head, most of her injuries are superficial. They're cuts, scratches, and bruises. Once we get the brain injury under control, she'll be okay." 

"Brain injury?" 

"Yes, the brain injury, I said that she has-" The nurse continued to speak. Seungmin blocked her out again. His brain couldn't adjust to the influx of information he was receiving. He could hear her, but his brain was in denial. 

The last time he saw Cynthia was this morning. They woke up in their shared queen sized bed like usual. The two went through their morning routine until they parted ways. Seungmin went into the JYP studio a little later than usual and Cynthia went to purchase Christmas presents. They weren't supposed to reunite like this. 

Upon reaching the door, the nurse stuck out a handful of manicured nails to turn the knob. Seungmin's stomach began to churn with anxiety. If she went through the windshield, would he be able to recognize her? He held his breath and followed the nurse inside. 

He ignored the woman clutching Cynthia's hand. His eyes went straight to the bed. He took a step back trying to keep his knees from buckling. His muscles wanted to give out. He wanted to hit the ground, curl up in a ball, and sob. Maybe it would have been better if Chan came with him. 

"Can she feel pain?" His voice came out quiet. 

"No, we have her on pain medicine. Right now, she's entirely pain free. It looks bad, but she can't feel any of it, I promise." 

"Thank you." 

"No problem. I'll leave the three of you alone for a while. If you need something, I'll be out here with the nurses." The nurse shut the door and left Seungmin and Flora alone with an unconscious Cynthia. 

"Were you with her?" 

Flora shook her head. "She had my number in her wallet. One of the nurses contacted me nearly an hour ago and I've been here ever since then." Her eyes were swollen from crying. A bit of scratchiness was left behind from her previous sob session. "How did you find out?"