Forget-me-not

Seungmin

"Where did he go?"

"I thought he was just going to go get water."

"Should we start without him?"

"Everyone line up, we're going on a field trip to find the family dog," Lee Know called out. He clapped his hands together and waved everyone together in a single-file line. Felix got up behind him and latched his arms around one of Lee Know's.

"Do you think he got distracted?"

"Maybe he's just blowing up the bathroom," Changbin offered.

"Maybe he should have warned me beforehand," Lee Know shot back.

Without Seungmin, there'd be a hole where he was supposed to be dancing. It'd drive Lee Know crazy, so they had to go find him. They started out speaking quietly until Lee Know told them to be quiet because he wanted to scare Seungmin as payback.

Things were going great until he stopped at a corner. Beside him, Felix had a hand over his mouth, trying not to laugh and expose their presence. Two voices flew through the air and Lee Know's brow raised at what sounded like Cynthia.

"Is that-"

He pressed a finger over Felix's lips to quiet him. Felix ceased talking instantly and Lee Know shifted his head around the corner. Behind him, the rest of the guys were just as, if not more, curious about the situation.

"You proposed to me?" Cynthia's voice came out louder than anyone expected.

Half-way through a gasp, Lee Know shoved a hand over Felix's mouth to silence the rest of it. The group stayed hidden behind the wall. Seungmin and Cynthia were too caught up in the situation to realize they had observers.

Lee Know turned around, pressed a finger to his lips to order everyone to be quiet, and waved everyone back towards the practice room. This was a conversation that nobody else needed to be involved in. Clearly, Cynthia must have remembered and Seungmin didn't need the added stress of seven other people meddling in his business.

Seungmin felt trapped by her words. He stepped onto a sticky mouse trap and couldn't get back off. It's not that he didn't want to respond, but this was a conversation that he had been dreading. In the back of his head, he knew there was a potential for it to happen, but he had been hoping it wouldn't come to this. He wanted to bring it to Cynthia's attention, further down the line.

"You remembered?" He managed to utter.

"No. Two younger fans came into the flower shop and wanted to see the ring. Why didn't you tell me we were engaged?"

"I was afraid to hurt your feelings," Seungmin admitted.

"Why would that hurt my feelings?"

"I never wanted you to feel trapped. If all of my memories were wiped away and I came back and was told that I had been proposed to by someone that I couldn't remember, I'd feel pressured to love them again. I didn't want to do that to you. I was trying to look out for you, I swear."

"So what are we?"

"We're just dating."

He hated the way there was a hurt that flashed in her eyes. He didn't mean to hurt her like this, but it was the truth. "Listen, I can explain. I just-"

"You what?"

He glanced up and down the hall before he gently slipped his hands into hers. He pulled her inside and shut the door behind the two of them. Cynthia searched around and took in the break room. She had hidden in here a few days ago and broke down. All those memories felt so far away now.

Seungmin pulled her over to a wooden table and gestured for her to sit down. She did what she was told and he sat across from her. A deep breath filled his lungs before he released it. "There are two sides to our relationship. There is who we were and who we are now. Does that make sense?"

Cynthia nodded.

"Before the accident, I proposed to you, that's true. We had been living together for a while and we truly loved each other. Despite our differences and the bickering, we were both on cloud nine. I couldn't even get out the full proposal before you screamed, jerked me up, and kissed me."

Her cheeks went red from embarrassment.

"I believe it was last October. The guys and I were going to have a comeback later that month and after the holidays, we were supposed to start planning the wedding, but-"

"Then the accident happened," she finished for him.

"Yeah. The accident happened and I'm sorry, but I couldn't find the strength to tell you. You were already hurting from everything with Flora and I just..." A frown filled his face. "I was scared and I was worried. I didn't want to make you feel like shit. I didn't even know if you even wanted to date me."

"I know it's really shitty," he continued, "but I didn't want to freak you out. I never want to pressure you into doing anything."

A flurry of different emotions fluttered through Cynthia. There was a small part of her that was upset, but she also couldn't blame him. It was confusing for both of them to navigate through the rocky waters of this situation. After a few seconds of continued silence, Seungmin's heart dropped. He couldn't believe that he fucked it up this badly.

"I'm not mad at you," Cynthia finally spoke up. "Honestly, I'm not sure if I could ever be mad at you. Annoyed? Yeah, sometimes, but I'm not sure about being mad. Do you still have the ring?"

"Huh?"

"The ring? The ring you proposed with? I don't have it and-"

"I don't have it either. Last I knew, you were wearing it the morning of your accident. Maybe you lost it in the accident or maybe Flora might have..." He trailed off. He hated thinking that Flora might have done something to the ring. He spent a pretty penny on it and had it customized for Cynthia.

"Do you have a photo of it? What did it look like? Maybe I can try to remember seeing it somewhere in her apartment."

Seungmin shifted, pulled out his phone, and began swiping through his photos. He had a photo of it somewhere. He knew he did because after the proposal, he made sure to take a photo, so he could brag. He sent it to the band members, he sent it to his family and friends, and he posted it on bubble.

Obviously, the company didn't know until it was too late, but once it was out there, it was out there. He was glad too because he was Cynthia's and she was his. The two of them were totally off limits and he wanted fans to respect that decision.

"It was a gold band with a small oval-shaped emerald gem on it. Not oval, I guess it was more tear drop shaped. It was simple, but you really liked it." He continued swiping across his phone. "I'm trying to find the photo I have of it."

"Oh my god."

"Aha! I found it!" He shifted the phone to show her the photo. It was a photo that he had taken of her hand. "Do you like it?" Cynthia's face fell and so did his. "You hate it, don't you?"

"I don't hate it, but I know where it is."

"Really? Where? We can go get it!"

Cynthia hesitated and he instantly knew. His stomach churned in knots. "Please don't tell me that it's with Flora."

"It's with Flora."