Steal my Heart.

37

I don't know where I went wrong. If I fell for the wrong person or if falling in itself was a mistake. All I know is, I don't like this pain gnawing away within me. I feel it, it makes me feel alive; but at the same time, it is also eating away at my insides. Someday, it will get better. But today, I have to live with it. I miss him. I shouldn't, but I do. When do we ever do the things good for us?

I shut my diary and place the pen back in the holder. At least something good came out of this heartbreak. I can try and become a writer. I can let the pain make me instead of breaking me. I smile wishfully to myself.

I never thought I'd ever get my heart broken. But then I never even thought I'll fall in love. That too, with someone like Alastair. Maybe life has surprises for all of us.

I brush the gloss against my lips again as I pick up my bag. I have this thing I do when I get sad. I dress up really good and once I'm done, I look in the mirror and think how pretty I am. Too pretty to be sad. It somehow works.

What I know is, our mind functions the way we want it to. We can convince ourselves of anything, and that's how we achieve great things or bring upon our downfall. That is why they say, we are our own biggest enemy and best friend. The only thing I can't seem to get my mind to do is forget Alastair.

I leave for Music day. It will be an awesome show, I'm sure of it. When I reach the ground, Levi is waiting for me near the Help Desk.

"Hey Grace." He gives me a wide smile when I'm near him.
"Hey Levi." I say half-heartedly. I did not expect to see him here. He's nice but he's too clingy. I don't really feel safe around him. I have this bad feeling at the back of my mind but I ignore it.

"Can we go for a walk?" He asks and I am about to refuse when I see Alastair laughing with another girl a few metres away. Jealousy erupts within me and I don't even try to control it.

"Yes." I smile sweetly at Levi and take one last look at Alastair before turning. I know I'm being a bitch right now, but I can't help it. Anyways, it's not like Alastair cares.

We walk towards the edge of the ground and Levi's hand touches mine more than a few times. I fold my hands across my chest. Soon, we reach a secluded area. He turns to me and holds my shoulders, looking into my eyes.

"Grace, ever since I first saw you, I felt something. I like you. And I think you like me too." He says and inches closer to me.

What the hell? How did we go from taking a harmless walk to this? I'm still framing a coherent answer in my brain when leans in towards me.

I want to push him away. I want to shove off his shoulders and run off, but my feet are rooted to the ground. I start to back off slowly but his hands on my shoulders tighten.

His face is very close to mine and I'm about to push him away when a crackling sound is heard. It takes me a while to access the situation. When I finally do, Levi is lying on the ground and Alastair is standing there, seething and furious.

Levi gets up holding his now swollen jaw and Alastair towers over him, ignoring me like I am not here.
"Get the fuck out of here." He says and Levi gets up, slinking away.
"I'll get back to you asshole." He says and Alastair snaps his fingers, dismissing him.

Once Levi walks away, I realize I'm still standing there, shell shocked. Levi didn't even fight Alastair back. What was his intention all along? Was he just-

"What the fuck is your problem Grace?" Alastair asks me. He looks so intimidating right now. The angry nerve on his neck twitches and his eyes are clouded over with rage. His lips are pressed in a thin line and he is super angry. Hot, but scary.

"Thank you. And, s-sorry." I mutter as it hits me, what could've happened if he wouldn't have come to my rescue.

"Please." He raises his hand in annoyance. What's wrong with him? "Shut up Grace. When the fuck will you learn to stand up for yourself? When will you fucking learn to say 'no'? I thought you were a smart girl, but sometimes you act so damn stupid!" He all but yells at me and my jaw drops to the ground.

"Why are you shouting at me?" My voice comes out meek.
"Learn to speak up for yourself. Or were you enjoying the attention? Did you want him to kiss you?" He yells and that is when I lose it.

"Shut up. Don't say a word after this. Who the hell are you to say anything to me? Stop putting me down." I yell and now we're so close, our noses are touching. I'm breathing heavily and all I can see is red in front of my eyes.

"Putting you down?" He mocks me with an angry smirk. "You should've pushed that guy off. I told you he was a creep. Why else did you befriend him? Tell me, you liked him, didn't you?" He tries to push me towards the edge and I sneer.

"What if I did? Why the fuck is this your problem? Why did you follow me till here? Why did you ask me to stay away from him, it was clearly my bloody business. Why did you hit him? No one asked you to, okay? Speak up, we aren't even talking. Why do you do all this?" I scream into his face. At this point, I don't even care if anyone hears us.

Alastair is fully red now. It seems like he's trying very hard to control his temper. But just like a volcano, he explodes.

"Because I love you goddamnit!"