Lucy Bronzes POV:
I think it's impossible to completely stop loving someone. When you put it into perspective, how can you go from being so consumed by someone that your world revolves around them, to them then just becoming simply a stranger? I just cant grasp my head around the concept.
Keira Walsh. Where do i even begin? She has to be one of a kind. She is one of a kind. I can remember the first day i saw her. A terrified teenager, who has just signed her first professional contract for her childhood club. She was a hard shell to crack initially, probably because she felt intimidated being surrounded by older players, but after she settled in i found myself enjoying being around her. I was unsure of what it was at first. Friendship? Or was it something more?
It was so much more.
I hadnt been in many 'healthy' relationships its fair to say. And i had never explored anything with a girl before, plus with a child in the mix it just didnt seem like a good idea to get into a relationship. However, i found myself slowly falling for her, and no matter how hard i tried to prevent it i just couldnt stop. It was scary at first, falling for someone whos not a boy. What would people think? Did she even feel the same way? Did she like girls like that?
Also, would she even want to be with me if it meant having to look after a toddler as well? There were so many factors that i just gave up on the idea of us ever being something more. It wasnt worth the potential heart break. Id get over it.
But little did i know she felt the exact same way as i felt. One night, after i had just put Lily to bed, I heard a knock at my flat door, and to my surprise on the other side of the door was Keira, who seemed flustered and quite panicked.
'Keira? What are you doing here? Are you alright?' I asked her, guiding her into my living room. 'Im sorry for coming unannounced, I probably shouldnt have. But im going crazy and its just eating my alive now. I need to know.' She rambled on pacing up and down the room. 'Woah, lets sit down first. Need to know what?' I replied, trying to seem confident to hopefully calm her down. 'I dont really know how to word this. Is there- Do you- What are we?' She scrambled, trying to find the right way to say it. 'What are we?' I repeated back to her, shocked at her boldness. 'You know what never mind. I shouldn't have come. Im sorry.' She said, standing up off the sofa. 'No wait.' I stop her, grabbing her hand and making eye contact with her. She looked down at our connected hands, then at my eyes, then at our hands again, and sat back down. 'Have i read this all wrong? I didnt mean to throw this onto you.' She asked me, her innocence evident in her tone. 'No, no you havent Kei.' I attempt to reassure her, as she looked as if she was about to pass out at any second. 'I just.. i dont really know what im doing. Ive never felt like this about.. about a girl before. Im trying to figure it all out, but i didnt know if i had just got the wrong impression.' She admitted, her eyes glossing over with a layer of tears. 'Its okay, I understand. I dont really know what im doing either, but you havent got the wrong impression.' I revealled to her, a small smile appearing on my face. 'I think i like you Lucy.' She then said, almost as if she was confirming it to herself. 'Id hope so.' I joked back, trying to make her less stressed. She laughed back at me, a singular tear falling down her cheek. 'You know what i mean.' I do know what she means. 'Why are you upset?' I asked her, trying to navigate how shes feeling. 'Im not sad. Im more scared i think. Not of you. Im scared because.. well your a girl, and im also a girl, and people are mean. But i think- i think I've known for a while now, that i dont like boys like that. Looking back i dont think ive ever actually felt the way I feel for you. Not even when i had a boyfriend. This feels.. right. Ive never spoken to anyone about this before, and im just worried people will look at me differently, or how my family will react. Sorry. Im rambling now.' She panicked, shaking her head at herself. 'Hey, slow down. Its okay to be scared.' I replied, placing my hand on her back to provide some kind of support. She was literally trembling next to me, biting her nails whilst a few stray tears fell. 'Do you want a hug?' I asked, not really sure of what else to say. She just nodded, and collapsed into my embrace. She ended up staying round mine that night, and our relationship only developed from there.
I never thought id be in the situation that im in now. Never. With Keira being asleep in my bed, except shes now not my girlfriend. She wasnt mine and i wasn't hers. And it made me feel physically sick. She looked peaceful asleep, as if she hadnt slept in a long time. I lowered myself down onto my pillow, facing her, and just couldnt take my eyes off of her. I missed her so much. So so much. Honestly theres nothing i regret more than not working through our problems. But now i fear it was too late.
She began to stir next to me, and slowly her eyes started to flutter open. It took her a few seconds to realise where she was, rolling her head to look around the room before her eyes landed on me. 'Is Lily okay?' Is the first thing she asked me, in her usual morning voice. The voice that i have been deprived of for weeks. 'Yeah, shes in the shower at the moment.' I reply, unable to take my eyes off her. 'Good.' She simply said, mirroring the same look. 'Are you okay?' She then questioned, taking me by surprise slightly. 'Ill be okay.' I reassure her, as well as myself. I hope ill be okay. 'Do you want a hug?' She then asks, as i did all them years ago at the beginning of our relationship. Like she did, i just nod, and allow her to wrap her arms around me. Breathing in her scent felt like i could just breathe again. Things have been tough lately and ive forgotten what its like to be able to relax. 'God you dont know how much i miss this.' She whispers to me, holding me tighter as if i was going to disappear. 'I think i might.' I admit, holding her closer to my body, not even letting air separate us. 'I dont know how to function without you Keira.' She pulls away from me and rests her hands on my flustered cheeks. 'You dont have to.' She says, searching my face for a reaction. 'Look. I know that these last few months have been... hard for the both of us. But nothing is worse than being apart from you. I dont want to live my life without you. I dont want to grow old without you. I want to give us a second chance.' She admits, getting choked up over her sentences. 'If you dont want that, then ill leave right now, and we can go back to what we were doing. We will stay civil and just do weekend visits. And we'll just be teammates-' she then beings to ramble, but i interrupt her by pressing a light kiss to her lips.
'What the fuck.'
Lily.
Oh shit.
'Language!' I say, before looking at her and seeing the beeming smile upon her face. 'Knew you guys wouldnt be able to keep your hands off each other in the same bed.' She smirks, standing at the end of the bed. 'Funny.' I say, unimpressed. 'Lighten up Lucy.' Keira jokes, causing Lily to laugh. 'Anyone care to explain what ive interrupted? Are we back on track or are we having a one night stand?' She asks, sarcasm laced in her tone. 'What do you think?' I ask, mirroring the same tone. 'So its a one night stand! Oh you wh-' she starts to joke, but i interrupt her before she can finish her words. 'Dont even think about finishing that sentence little miss.' I say, Keira just laughing at our interaction. Lily just smiles, and jumps on the bed and scrambles to wrap her arms around us. 'Tell me i havent gotten my hopes up for nothing.' She practically begs, her voice overflowing with hope. 'You havent Lil.' I reassure her, i can practically the feel the happiness re-entering my body. I was never letting go of this ever again.
I was never letting go of Keira ever again.
Authors note:
-last part of this short story! i was thinking of starting an actual book alongside my one shots book, what do you think?
