~ R I Y A ~
Islamabad, Pakistan
Hanbal had some work in Islamabad and he was staying in a hotel. His constant calls and messages had me fill my departure form and stay with him in the en-suite he was rooming over for two days.
I sat cross legged in the balcony. Far-away were the green hills of Murree. My eyes roaming around the scenery bathing in darkness and silence, there were a little honking from the cars on the deserted road below me but altogether it was awfully peaceful. The cool breeze of Murree from the mountains was fluttering my hair and I sat admiring the stars.
I heard a few shuffles and sensed my husband sit down beside me on the floor. His willowy fingers ran over my face and then he tucked the stray strands behind my ear that were non-stop bugging me. He placed his chin on my shoulder.
"What are you doing, honey?"
"Listening to insects' noises." I shrugged. There was nothing to do when it came to admiring the nature. You just have to sit and observe. That's all!
His throaty chuckle vibrated against my skin. "What exactly are you thinking?"
"I can't put my mind to anything. My thoughts are scattered."
"Of all the thoughts, which one is bugging you the most?"
"There are so many! But two top the list."
"Mind if you share?" The tucked in strands of my hair that had set themselves loose again and now they were dancing wildly in the air. He gently pulled all of my hair to back of my head.
"People of my age are doing their Masters while I am still stuck in BS."
"Hon, you are at the last semester. You have almost made it!" He tried to cheer me up.
"I feel like a granny at my university now. I am the oldest one in my batch." I sighed.
He placed his hands on knees and turned me towards himself. Cupping my face, he gently stroked the underneath of my eyes with his thumb. "Is that why you have started to have bags underneath your eyes because you are overthinking the night away in your hostel?"
His words and touch were balmy. I let myself spill more of the deeper secrets of mine in front of him. "Sometimes I go to sleep early. Other times I stay up till the fajar azaans make the indications of dawn ."
He wearily looked at me, "that was why I wasn't into this dormitory life or anything. In fact, the whole idea of sending you to another city was ridiculous."
"Hanbal." I whispered his name.
"What?" He snapped at me.
Oh no, why was he getting mad at me out of blue?
"I haven't been okay since a long, long time and I don't know who to blame. I don't if I should be mad at my mother for leaving me behind like this, or is it my father at fault for not standing up for me the way a father should; should I blame myself for not being strong enough?"
He pulled in air through his nose. "You haven't come out of it even after all this while." He spoke sadly to no one in particular. "Will you ever come back to normalcy?" His eyes grazed over me expectedly.
