Awoken (Ilea, Book I) (COMPLETED)

Chapter 16

I know i said i wouldn't do author's notes but about half an hour after i posted Chapter 15 I added another couple of pages to the end of it because i think it makes it more fluid...so to the 11 people who read it straight away i thank you and I appologise...just check if you're up to date before you read this chapter because you'll have missed out on quite a bit of action if you didnt read what i added...

whilst im here...another big thank you! to everyone reading this, it might seem impersonal because i dont usually do these note things but i like people to be able to focus on the actual story, personally it winds me up a little when people put these in cs it distracts me  and pulls me out of what i'm reading...if you comment though im more than happy to reply =)......love to everyone reading and especially the people who have fanned me =P

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I woke up on a bed of soft linen and saw the sunlight streaming through the window. The first thing I thought was; Isn’t it pretty. Then the reality came back to me and I closed my eyes again, wishing that I could go back into the dreamless state I had been in. I pulled the cover over my head, burying myself under it and tightly closing my eyes.

It was my fault.

A cool hand softly brushed my hair away from my eyes and I looked up to see Rowan’s worried eyes looking down on me. I looked around half hoping that Isaac would be there in the background , just standing in the corner, quiet as usual, but he wasn’t and I felt the unhappiness wash over me; it was my fault. Tears welled up in my eyes and I tried to blink them away, but failed. I slowly felt them trickle down my cheeks and into my hair and mouth, noticing their salty taste. Rowan stroked my forehead again and pulled me up into his arms. I lay my head on his chest, scarcely noticing that his skin was bare “Why did it have to be him?” I said, almost to myself.

“It must just have been his fate.”

“No, it was my fault, I’ve messed with all of you.”

“Don’t think that Ilea.”

“How can I not think it?” I closed my eyes again and spoke quietly, “He was so young and innocent… it should have been me.”

“Don’t say that, don’t ever say that!” I opened my eyes to look at Rowan’s face and saw the anger in his expression.

“Rowan, the wolf was charging at me, he was aiming for me not Isaac, I should be the one lying cold and dead on the ground.” Rowan grabbed me by the shoulders and shook me abruptly. I could see the anger in his eyes.

“Why would you even say such a thing?”

“Because I know it’s the truth, if I hadn’t asked for Isaac then he wouldn’t have tried to protect me and would still be living a life that was his and had barely begun.”

“Ilea, how do you know that he wouldn’t have died at exactly that time and day if he had been anywhere else? He could have fallen down a flight of stairs or eaten an uncooked piece of meet and been poisoned, you never know what would happen…”

“Yes but well never be able to know, in the same logic he could have lived until he was one hundred.” I put my palm on Rowans cheek, “I just blame myself for his death and nothing or no one can convince me otherwise.” Rowan just looked at me with sad eyes and turned his head slightly to kissed the palm that was on his cheek.

He slowly raised his other and to wipe the tears off my face and I looked down at it and then into his eyes. As I did so, I could see the hurt and love he felt for me, but also could see the infatuation he had for me. I took my hand away from his cheek quickly, “I can’t do this Rowan.”