♧ 12. Missing & Loving ♧

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Kim rolls over and groans

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Kim rolls over and groans. The sheets of paper underneath him let out a crumpling sound, but he doesn't care. He doesn't think that there's anything else that can possibly get into his brain tonight. He doesn't even remember what he was studying thirty minutes ago. He looks longingly at the guitar sitting in the corner of his living room. He should have studied music instead of business, but first, he would have to have a talent for that, and as his father said countless times, Kim does not have that.

So, business it is. He has to pass this exam on the first try! If he does, he will have way more time to be with his boyfriend. He can't believe it has been two weeks already since that night. Kim keeps thinking about it every day and every night. Keeps dreaming about it. Keeps feeling Chay's burning touch all over him. He misses Chay so much. Not only because of all that deep-rooted desire he feels towards him but also because he simply wants to rest. He wants to be held by Chay's strong arms and simply not to think about anything anymore. But in the past two weeks, he could barely do that. All the time Kim has spent in Desire, he was training. And the moment the training was done, he ran back home so he could continue studying without any distractions; the distraction being obviously his boyfriend.

He hates it! But it's fine. Tomorrow he'll go to university, he'll pass the exam and then he'll be free until the next semester starts. He'll get plenty of time to spend with Chay and get better at being a future bouncer. He feels himself getting better every training. It's all small steps, but Kim is finally gaining confidence that he might actually be worthy of this job, that he can do it, and he can be good at it. He can make Chay proud.

Suddenly, Kim shakes his head and sits up. The crumpled sheets of paper under him are finally able to breathe. There he goes again—thinking about Chay instead of studying. He looks around—his living room is truly a mess! There are papers and books everywhere. Has he made all this mess? Wonderful.

He is thinking about whether he should just get up and start tidying it up or just continue studying when there's a doorbell followed by a knock. Kim freezes. He starts looking around, searching for his phone. After a couple of seconds and the second sound of the doorbell, he finally finds it in between the pages of 'Macroeconomics.'

The display is saying that it's 10:30 pm. Who—

"Baby, it's me. Don't worry," Chay's voice sounds faintly through Kim's front door.

Kim freezes again in horror. Chay?! Now? Oh, no! No, no, no! Kim's whole apartment is a mess! How is he supposed to let Chay in while he won't be able to even properly walk around? This is a disaster! Oh god, oh god, what to do? What to do?

"Kim, are you there?" Chay's voice comes from behind the door again, and this time, he sounds even a little bit worried.

Kim immediately feels guilty. He bites his bottom lip and takes a deep breath—okay, well, he has no choice but to show Chay his true, messy side. Quickly, he gets up and elegantly like a ballet dancer he tippytoes through the mess, which is his living room floor.

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