I'm Just a Loser: A BigBang Fanfiction

Finally

The weeks pass and Seung seems to anticipate the meeting he has with YG more and more each day, tomorrow being the big day. He is like a little kid sometimes and that is why I just love him so much.
"Have you been counting down the days on your calendar?" I ask him as we eat in our small dining room in the apartment.
"No," he smirks and looks outside, the lights of the glowing city shining brighter than they have before.
"You weirdo." I smile at him and he returns it and looks down, still smirking.
"Thanks," his eyes meet mine again and I can see the lights reflect in his dark brown eyes.
"For what?"
"Everything. For helping me through my rough times. For picking me up when I fall. Thank you for holding me when I cried like a damn baby. Bree, thank you for the years we have shared. For the ups and obviously the downs. For taking my hand and leading me to the light when all I felt was darkness surrounding me. Thank you standing next to me when I failed and telling me to dust it off and try again. For looking in to my eyes and showing me a deep compassion. Bree Annelesy, thank you for loving me." he finishes and I sit speechless looking at him.
"Y-you are welcome." I stutter smiling, struggling at any other words.
"I've been thinking a lot about us lately," he swallows and I can tell where this is going but I refuse to believe my own intuitions,"it's been over three years since we met and before that time, I have never felt this strong of a connection with someone. I have always been a little confused, you know, a little anxious about my future. For a long time, I felt unlovable, unworthy. You make me feel so loved. And so, my beautiful girl...I was wondering if maybe after this meeting tomorrow, no matter what happens," he winks at me but then becomes more serious. A pause is held before the next words escape his lips,"would you want to get married to me?"
"O-oh my god," I begin to tear up at the sight of a beautiful diamond engagement ring in his right hand, leaning across the table.
"I know it isn't a traditional proposal with like the knee and roses and clapping, restaurant thing, but I thought we could start now at paving our own way. Yeah?" He smiles.

God how I love him.

"Yes. Yes. Yes!"I stand up and walk to the other side of the cafe table in my tiny apartment,"I love you so much."
I press my lips against his as he slides the ring on my finger. Perfect fit.
"Ha helped me on the sizing." He says against my lips and I feel my tears fall down my cheeks and I swear I saw him shed one himself. I sit on his lap, crossing my legs.
"I love you so much," I cry more and hold his face between my hands.
"I love you too," he moves close to me and I feel his arms wrap around me, holding me close to him.
"You know," I release my lips from his,"that proposal might have been the cutest thing I've ever seen. Super original by the way."
"Good, that's what I was going for if you couldn't tell."

You know that feeling when you were little? That feeling you got when you thought about getting married to that one Disney prince you just had the biggest crush on? Imagine that except times one hundred. That's how I was feeling in his arms with that ring on my finger. My adrenaline was at an all time high and I couldn't have meant those three words any more.

•••

I walked in to work the next day with Seunghyun by my side, in a very nice suit and me in my best office attire, with my bright heels, of course.
"Papers?" I ask going down my mental list I made for today.
"Check."
"Contract?"
"Check."
"Smile?"
"Check." He grims and wraps his arms around me,"fiancé?"
"Check," I kiss his cheek and we begin to walk farther in to the agency before we are bombarded with the guys and Ha.
"OH MY GOD BREE!" She screams and runs toward me hugging me tightly.
"I know! I know!" I laugh as I see the guys pat Seunghyun on the back while murmuring things.
"I never thought you had the balls to do it man." Ji laughs and Seung lifts his arm to smack him but he doesn't.
"Don't test me," he laughs.
"Can I see it Noona?" Ri asks me and I hold out my hand displaying the sparkling ring.
"That must have cost him all the money we made in the first three years after the debut!" Daesung's eyes widen and I laugh.
"I am so happy for you!" Ha Neul smiles and hugs Seunghyun.
I raise my eyebrow at Ji and he just looks away, knowing exactly what I meant by it.
"Bree Choi is kind of a weird name," Youngbae peaks out from behind Dae.
"Shut up. At least I'm not a young bae." I say.
"Yep, now you're an old bae, getting married and all," He teases and I laugh along with him.
"Yep."
"I've missed you hyung," Ri smiles up at Seung who exchanges it with him.
"I've missed you too you little pain in the ass," he lightly punches SeungRi's upper arm.
"No cursing," he slaps his hand and looks at me,"or noona will get you."
"Yeah," I pinch his cheek,"the panda knows the truth."
Ri giggles and I check my phone for the time.
"You better go," I smile and kiss him deeply before releasing his lips.
"Wish me luck," he smiles to all of us. As we wave, I see him take a deep breathe and go to YG's office.

"I love you," I whisper under my breath as the door shuts behind him.

•••

The time is killing me. I cannot stop staring at the clock, Ha joining me in watching it. Lunch break is almost here and that's when we find out what happened. I feel like everything should be fine but to be honest, I have no idea.
"Please," I set my forehead on the edge of my desk,"come on just give us a break for once." I look down at my ring, sitting next to promise ring. They matched perfectly.

After a few minutes I feel Ha touch my shoulder with a concerned look on her face,"ready?"
"More than I'll ever be." I heave my chest in a sigh and sit up off my chair. I see Hee-Young mouth the words congrats to me as she sees my ring. She had been so mean to me before but that small gesture just brought a barrage of happiness to me.
I reply saying thank you and Ha and I walk out.
I didn't believe in God because who would after all the shit he put me through, but I was praying more than I ever have.

Wherever you are, or have been for the past 26 years of my life, could you please just-just fix all this crap. Please? I just need you to help me out for once.

I sat in the lobby with the guys, who were practically pulling their hair out. The anxiety we were all feeling was insane.
"What if he doesn't-" Ri starts.
"Don't jinx it you idiot," Youngbae covers his mouth.

I saw Seunghyun walk out of the office, blowing air out of his mouth, a tinge of red in his eyes. His frown made me realize what had happened.
I walked up to him and held on to his shoulders, crying in to his shoulder.
"No, no it's okay baby." He slowly strokes my back,"I know it's hard."
"Seunghyun I am so sorry."
"Me too, I hate that I'm going to have to spend so much time with them. Idiots." He scoffs and my heart skips a beat.
"WHAT?!" I scream and he nods his head smiling like a child as the guys stand in awe behind me.
"I'm back," he whispers, tears build in his eyes as he looks at all of us.
"YES OH MY GOD YES!" SeungRi screams at the top of his lungs and jumps in to Seung's arms crying.
"Dude. Chill." He laughs and the guys gather around to hug him.
"I'm so proud of you," I say from a distance, making a heart sign with my hands and he returns it, winking at me.

Everything was working out. Finally.

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Hi you wonderful people! Sorry this update is kind of short, but the story is coming to a close *tear*. It isn't over yet so don't worry but it should only have a few more chapters. I hate sad endings so I decided to make this one a good ending because that would be mean if I didn't. I have some more ideas for an EXO fanfiction, in case you didn't see that update I posted on my profile. This story really wasn't planned out...like at all...in the beginning but now I have learned (thank god) so I have outlines for the new ones. If you haven't already, please be sure to check out Imperfect, which is my other fanfiction that I am writing right now. You guys are the best and I love hearing from you so don't be afraid to comment or vote. I like it. *creeper stare* ...ANYWAYS, you guys are fabulous and hope all of you Americans had a great 4th and even if you aren't American I still hope your 4th was great because every day should be great right? Lots of love.

Xoxo

Livi