My time at the dorm was coming to an end, and there was nothing I could do about it. The thought of it made me want to curl up into a ball and cry, but I kept calm, or instead, I shut everyone out to stay calm. I felt that if any of the members talked to me, I'd break down and sob, and that included Kyungsoo.
"Jagiya, talk to me." He pled with me endlessly, before getting frustrated and giving up.
I stayed in the dorm all day, not even attempting to go to any of their dance practices or interviews. I continued to cook for them when Soo didn't feel like it, and I had even begun cleaning the dorm. If I didn't do anything to help out, it would make me feel guilty, which wouldn't help my already sorry state.
I had begun having the nightmares again. Kyungsoo, in his frustration, had started sleeping in his room once more, leaving me alone. His presence had stopped them, but I, being stubborn, had refused to tell him. So instead I suffered through them, through the endless darkness and solidarity, without speaking up. I was ridiculous, I knew, but my stubbornness was a habit I couldn't break.
After a particularly rough nightmare, I almost went into Soo and Jongin's room. I stood at the door for a good 10 minutes deciding whether or not to go in but decided against it at the last minute. I crawled back into my bed and closed my eyes. I had faced my nightmares plenty of times before; I could do it for one more.
Today I was doing what had become my routine, sitting in my bed for an hour after waking up to scroll on my phone, when suddenly a knock sounded at my door. "Come in," I called quietly. A head of silver hair appeared in the doorway. It was Chanyeol.
"Get dressed. We're going out." I opened my mouth to protest, but he silenced me with a look. "Don't argue." He closed the door, and I immediately flopped back onto my bed. "Don't you dare go back to sleep!" He called through the door. I rolled my eyes and groaned.
I sat for another couple of minutes before deciding to follow his orders. I pulled on some skinny jeans with some black combat boots and a black graphic t-shirt. I opted on leaving my hair up and opened the door, almost causing Yeol to fall into the room.
I laughed, and he stared at me in shock. "Haven't heard that sound in a while." He mused, causing me to punch his arm. "C'mon." He began to tug at my arm, but I didn't move.
The dorm was surprisingly empty. "Where is everyone?" I questioned.
"They all have schedules."
I lifted my eyebrow. "Why aren't you with them? And where are we going?"
He sighed, a hint of irritation showing. "Aish! Don't you ever stop asking questions? I don't have a schedule today." My disbelief was apparent. "I guess I'm not popular enough, and I'm not telling you where we're going. You need to get out of this dorm, and you know it." I scoffed, and he muttered a few choice words to himself. "Just come on."
I let myself be led out of the dorm building and into his car. In the front seat was none other than Ireum. "Hey!" She greeted. My confusion must've been obvious because she laughed. "I'll explain later." Yeol smiled brightly at her and pulled away from the parking lot.
—
We ended up at the supermarket, and Yeol smirked at me when we pulled up. "If I had told you we were coming to the store, would you have come?" I crossed my arms and pretended to be irritated, but I was impressed. He was a smart little shit. I wouldn't have come at all if he had told me we were coming here.
I watched him pull on a dust mask and sunglasses to hide who he was. Hopefully, there weren't too many crazy fangirls out this early who could recognize him.
As we entered the store, Yeol veered off to the left, leaving Ireum and me alone. "I'm going to get...things." He called after us.
She steered me over to a nearby window ledge and sat down. "So I heard you aren't your usual self at the dorm." She said slowly. That's when everything clicked into place. Yeol must've convinced her to talk me out of my mood.
I put my hands up. "Before you start, you said that you'd explain some things." She nodded. "Are you and him..together?"
"Yes." She confirmed. It wasn't hard to believe. I could tell they had gotten even closer since she had caught Baekyhun with Taeyeon, which was a little over three weeks ago. Baekyhun was almost back to his usual self. "But please don't tell anyone. We just got close because of the whole thing with Baek, and I.." She trailed off, and I nodded, accepting her answer. I wasn't going to make her explain any further than she wanted to.
"Right," she sighed, "now it's your turn. So why have you been giving everyone the silent treatment?" As I looked into her eyes, I felt the need to tell her everything, including the nightmares just because of how sincere she looked.
"First of all, you need to let Kyungsoo know. It isn't fair to him that you're keeping this from him. Channie has told me that he's worried sick about you, and he's losing his focus." I bit my lip. What she had said made me feel incredibly guilty, and I was already searching for ways to make it up to him.
"Second of all," she continued, "even if you do have to leave the dorm, you'd still be with Soo, so your worries are unfounded. Knowing him, he'd probably find a way for you to stay with him."
"Thank you, Ireum." I stood up and hugged her, grateful for the advice.
"If you ever need any advice or anything, just call me, okay? I've had to deal with the 9 of them for a while now, so I have some experience." She said.
"Some experience in what?" Chanyeol's deep voice sounded from behind me. He grabbed Ireum's hand and squeezed, causing her to giggle.
"Oh, nothing." They walked out the door, hand in hand, and I trailed after them, not minding being the third wheel.
