|| υѕ || ĸaѕмaтѕυ yυĸιo х reader ||

|| 13 ||

There is a pregnant pause in the air as you slowly absorb the details of Kasamatsu's story. Truth be told, you remember at least half of the things you did wile you were drunk. You remember walking back with him and getting in bed with him, and at least the latter part of your explanation. But this steamy makeout, you blush as you look at the floorboards.

"So what now," you ask.

"What now, huh." He shrugs as he takes another sip of the coffee. "Well, I'll leave that up to you, (Name)."

"Would you still manage to love me," you ask, suddenly. The question catches him off guard.

"I don't know."

"Do you want to try again?"

"I don't know, (Name)."

"Why don't you know," you ask, a small frown works its way up your face as you observe Kasamatsu.

"I won't deny that I felt something again, I liked what happened last night," he admits. "But, I'm human too, (Name), that day hurt me, a lot."

"Yuki-"

"Please don't call me that."

"Why?"

"You're so unfair, you know that," he smiles sadly, "you're unfair, confusing, and beautiful."

Tears begin to pool in your eyes, and you look up to staunch the flow of the tears. You will not cry in front of him. You don't want to. Is this what it all lead to? You'd spent the past few months and years keeping yourself from thinking about him. You'd forced your mind to occupy your thoughts with that of Kise and college. You'd been avoiding him because you knew somewhere in your heart that you would break if ever...

You were a weak person, you knew that. Nobody knew that better than you. That was why you loved him. You thought his strength would be enough for you. But you were a leech. All this time, you were just using them for your own satisfaction and now,  now you were receiving your due.

"You're my personal paradox, (Name)," Kasamatsu walks over to you and kneels, his hands find yours and his fingers intertwine with it. It happens so naturally, so casually, so intimately, it was meant to be. His free hand moves to wipe your tears away. "I love you and at the same time, I hate you."

"Please," you choke, "I'm sorry, I love you, I won't do it again."

He kisses your forehead as he stands up, "we need time."