Monsters Inside Him (Completed)

Chapter 23: Expulsion

Chapter 23: Expulsion

Sunday passed slowly. I called Zayn reluctantly and we set up another date, but other than that I didn’t do anything.

When Monday morning rolled around, I had to force myself out of bed because of class. Granted, it wasn’t until the afternoon, but still. It was about fucking time I showed up to University.

I made my way to the kitchen and poured myself some cereal. I ate it slowly as I sifted through the mail. I opened all the letters addressed to me. Bills I was behind on, letters from my family and one from the school.


Dear whomever it may concern,
It is with deep regret that we inform you that __Hannah Olson¬__ is being expelled from London University. It is due to failing ( _3_) subjects and poor attendance that M( r/s ). __Olson__ is no longer welcome to participate in academic activities associated with London University. When the next semester begins, M( r/s ). __¬Olson__ is welcome to apply to begin her first year at the University again. 
Sincerely,
Dean Michael Richards


I stared in shock at the letter. Shit, I had just gotten kicked out of fucking London University. The rest of the letter was all crap about getting money back and shit, but I paid that no attention.

Shit, what am I going to do?

I am so fucked…

Not only will my parents kill me, but they’ll be disappointed in me. I’ve failed out of college. I fucking failed out of college.

And what am I going to tell them? Oh yeah, I got kicked out of college because my possessive boyfriend kidnapped me a couple times. Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck. And it’s not like I can go on pretending that I didn’t get kicked out because my parents probably got the same fucking letter- the school had their address because they’re the ones sending the checks for my tuition.

I didn’t even have it in me to cry. All I could do was fold the letter up with a sigh and slip it in the back of my pocket. I guess I would have to move back to the U.S now.

I miss my family so much.

I miss my old friends.

I miss my old life.

But was it weird that I really didn’t want to leave London? Maybe it was ending the adventure. Maybe it was my friendship with Claire.

Maybe it was Zayn…

But I don’t want to move back to the United States. I’m finally independent (well sort of…). I don’t think I’m ready to leave. I mean, Claire and I had just started getting really close.

I started working out plans in my head. Maybe if I get a job… I can help Claire with the rent if my parents refuse to help any more.

But who would want to hire a foreign girl, on a visa, who just got kicked out of University her first year? Hmm, maybe I’m not off to such a great start.

When Claire finally came into the kitchen, I silently handed her the letter. She didn’t say anything as she read it, folded it back up and engulfed me in a hug. I could feel her hot tears on my shoulder, but I refused to let myself cry. I had cried too many times this semester (mostly over one person who shall remain nameless) and if this letter meant anything to me, it was that I need to change my life right now. Starting with growing a pair of balls and not acting like a little cunt all the time.

She handed me back my letter and quietly wiped her eyes.

“We’ll figure this out, Hannah. We’ll figure this out…” She muttered quietly. I took back the evil letter and put it in my back pocket again.

“I… I just need to be alone. I need to call my parents before they check their mail.” I whispered, my whole being feeling empty inside at the thought of the phone call. I hadn’t spoken to my parents in forever and now, I’m finally going to call them, only to tell them I’ve been kicked out of the school that was draining their money.

I feel like a fucking moron- a loser.

Maybe I’ll call them later. The letter will take longer to reach them because they’re across the Atlantic back home, in America. I have about a day or two of leeway. Might as well enjoy it while I can.

Claire patted me gently and left the room, coming back a few minutes later with her purse and then leaving the apartment. Claire’s a good friend. She knows to give me my space when I need it and not to pry too much.

I’m going to miss her.

I stood in the kitchen with my hands gripping the edge of the counter. I hunched over the sink, prepared to vomit, but nothing came out. This whole situation’s nauseating.

I heard the apartment door open, but figured it was Claire. She probably forgot something. I stayed frozen for moment, waiting to hear Claire leave, but instead I felt a presence behind me. I spun around quickly to be met with a tall, broad frame instead of Claire’s petite one. Dark hazel eyes stared down at me intently.

“Z-zayn?” I stammered, still shocked that he knows how to get into my apartment.

“How did you-”

“You’re apartment really isn’t safe, Darlin’. Your locks are shit,” he spoke finally, his voice deep. A new cigarette hung from his mouth, captured between his lips. He brought a lighter up to his lips as he continued to stare at me. He lit his cigarette and went to breathe it in, but I quickly grabbed it and pulled it away from him. I doused it with water and left it to simmer in the sink.

Zayn stared down at me in amusement as he let out puff of smoke.

“Having a bad day, Darlin’?” He chuckled darkly.

“Don’t smoke in my flat!” I snapped at him, brushing past him to leave the kitchen. I heard him follow me out into the TV room.

“You alright? You haven’t dropped the f-bomb yet. Something wrong, Darlin’?” He asked with serious concern now. I turned around and stepped towards him. I pressed my cheek to his chest and curled my hands in to my stomach.

His muscular arms wrapped around my body cautiously and his face nuzzled in my hair at the top of my head.

“What’s wrong? What happened?” He rushed out, concerned over my behavior.

“Nothing,” I muttered against his chest, “nothing’s wrong. Nothing’s happened.”

I don’t know why, but I felt too embarrassed to tell Zayn about me getting kicked out. Yes, it was kind of his fault for preventing me from going to school, but I wasn’t actually all that angry. It was also my fault; I definitely could have tried harder to go to school.

“If nothing’s wrong then why am I hugging you like a small child?” He asked, pulling away slightly so that our eyes met. His thick brows were knitted together over his beautiful eyes.

“Can’t I have a hug?” I whined, trying to change the subject.

“You are the least needy person I know. The least touchy-feely and I’m in a fucking gang, so that says something. So, NO. You cannot just have a hug because that’s not you, Darlin’.” He said sternly. I sighed softly and pushed my head against his chest again.

“It’s nothing, really.”

“Don’t make me force it out of you, Darlin’.” He warned me.

“That a threat?” I countered stiffly.

“Yes.”

“Zayn-”

“If you don’t tell me, I’ll tickle you, and we both know I can pin you easily, Darlin’.”

I laughed lightly and pulled out of his grasp.

“Scary…” I rolled my eyes, turning my back on him. I heard him take a step towards me, but then I felt his hand reach into my back pocket and pull my letter out.

“ZAYN!” I yelped, spinning around and trying to grab at the paper. He held the folded letter above his head so that, even jumping up, I couldn’t get it.

“Do you want to tell me what this is?” He asked calmly, too calmly.

“No. It’s nothing. Give it!” I jumped for it again, but Zayn turned his back to me and began unfolding it.

“Zayn, stop!” I shouted, lunging for the letter, trying to reach around Zayn’s broad shoulders. He easily held me back with one hand as he skimmed over the letter. Eventually, he dropped down his arm so that I could reach for the letter if I wanted. I didn’t want to.

He tossed the evil paper aside and stared down at me sadly.

“You got kicked out of University?” He asked me in a quiet voice. I bit my lip and stepped back from him, nodding.

“Darlin’- I’m so sorry.” He stepped towards me and reached his arms out, I pushed them away.

“Don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault,” I muttered, staring at my feet in shame. His index finger and thumb caught my chin and tilted my face up so that I had to look at him.

“Bullshit. You and I both know that it’s my fault. Don’t be angry with me, please.” He whispered. I sighed and let him hug me.

“I’m not angry, I promise. I’m just disappointed in myself.”

“Don’t be disappointed in yourself, Darlin’. You’re the smartest person I know- you obviously would be succeeding at UNI if I hadn’t gotten involved.” He protested.

“Zayn, stop. I don’t feel like arguing with you.” I mumbled softly in pure exhaustion.

“It’s not the end of the world. The letter said you could reapply, right? Wait out the semester and then reapply.” He decided, patting me gently.

“I can’t afford to, Zayn. My parents are working their butts off just so I could attend classes THIS semester. All that money’s already wasted… I can’t make them do this whole thing again. Not all of us make a ton of money illegally like you do.” I pulled away and went to sit down on the couch, reality finally hitting me. Zayn came around and crouched in front of me. He stuck his face right up to mine, his hot-cigarette breath fanning my cheeks.

“I’ll pay for it.”

“No, I don’t want you to. I want to be independent, not needy.” I replied, sighing again.

“I’ll make them take you back. I’ll force them to change their minds.” He set his jaw in determination, his eyes blazing in ferocity.

“No. I don’t think beating the crap out of the dean will help, Zayn.” I put off his idea. His eyes softened and he leaned forward.

“We’ll figure this out, Darlin’. Don’t worry about it; it’s not the end of the world. Just take a few days for yourself, ok? Things will be better when you’re relaxed.” He ordered gently. I stared at him incredulously. Did he not realize…?

“Zayn, this IS the end of the world, don’t you get it? If I’m no longer at London University, I no longer get to stay in the school’s apartment which means I have no place to stay or no money to buy myself a flat. My parents will force me to move back home. Don’t you get it? WE won’t figure anything out because there will be no WE!” I snapped, pulling at my hair in frustration.

Zayn’s entire face fell dramatically. It was all dawning on him.

“Shit.”

“Exactly.” I hissed, burying my face in my hands. I heard him stand up and pace in front of me.

“Shit shit shit shit shit shit!!!” He shouted.

Suddenly, a loud crash made me jump, startling me. I gasped and looked up at Zayn, whose chest was heaving up and down from heavy, angry breathing. Across the room was water dripping down the wall and a broken vase with some damaged looking flowers on the floor.

“Jesus, Zayn.” I felt my voice shake slightly in fear. He looked down at me, his eyes black, before he turned abruptly on his heel and left, slamming my door behind him causing the entire building to tremor slightly.