Kiss Me ⇒ Camren

• 14 •

Lauren

I glance at the clock, seeing it's 9 a.m. Sleep hasn't come to me since Camila woke up at 2:30 a.m. with a nightmare of Austin. Luckily, she fell back asleep in my arms.

Currently, her arms are still wrapped tightly around my waist which is surprising to me considering she's sleeping yet her grip hasn't loosened even the slightest. I've been holding her this whole time, refusing to shut my eyes in case she wakes back up. There have been multiple times when my eyelids went to shut but I refused to let them. I can't sleep knowing my baby is like this.

Really, Lauren? Your baby?
Yes.
No, dumbass. She's not your baby. You're not even dating. You don't even like her.
Whatever helps you sleep at night...

I let out a small groan, bringing my hands up to rub at my temples. The voices in my head have been arguing with each other all night, giving me a pounding headache.

I feel movement around my hips causing me to look down at the girl I've stayed up for all night. Her eyes flutter open slightly and she looks up at me. A small smile forms on her lips and I can't deny that it's probably the cutest sight I've ever seen.

"Good morning, Camz" I say quietly, bring one hand down to brush a strand of hair away from her eyes.

"Morning, Lo." Her voice is raspy and holds grogginess.

God, that's hot.
Shut up.

"How'd you sleep, babe?"

Aw, you called her babe!
Once again, shut up.
Are her cheeks blushing?!
Oh my lord if you don't stop -

"Eh, other than the nightmare..." I feel her shake her head a little bit and a small sigh escapes her lips. "I slept okay. How'd you sleep?"

"I...uh...I didn't." I tell her honestly, watching her eyes widen.

"What?" Her voice holds concern and I can tell she's more awake as she sits up and places a hand on my cheek. "Are you okay?" She asks worriedly.

"I'm fine, Camz. Don't worry." I try to assure her as I place my hand over hers.

"That's bullshit. You haven't slept all night, Lauren." Her hand moves, brushing under my eyes where there are probably bags from the exhaustion.

"Camila, I'm fine. I promise." I tell her, taking her hand away from my face and holding onto it, caressing it lightly.

"Why didn't you sleep?"

I sigh lightly, frowning a little. "I was worried about you." I admit quietly.

She looks away from me quickly, but I don't miss the flash of guilt that appears on her face. She pulls her hand out of mine and fiddles with her thumbs while looking down at her lap. I notice a tear falls from her eyes and lands on the base of her thumb.

"Hey," I whisper as I reach out and put my thumb under her chin, slowly lifting her head up to meet my eyes. Her brown eyes that usually hold a sparkle in them are now glassy and full of tears. "Don't cry. It's not your fault, Camz." I whisper, my hand automatically find its way to her cheek, brushing away the fallen tears.

She inhales a deep, shaky breath, putting her hand on top of mine and bringing it away from her face. I can feel how unsteady her hand is, trembling slightly. She doesn't keep hold of my hand, instead placing it back on my lap and keeping hers to herself.

"That's the thing, Lauren." She breathes through shaky breath. "It is my fault." More tears fall from her eyes and I reach out to brush them away again but she leans back and turns her head away. "Don't. Please." The pleading in her voice makes me begin to feel nervous.

"Camila, what's wrong? I'm serious." My voice is shaking now due to the nerves and worry that are building inside me.

"You're gonna hate me." A small sob escapes her lips.

"Camz... that's ridiculous." I frown, my heart falling at the fact she'd even think that for a second.

"No it's not. Trust me." Another sob comes out of her mouth and I begin to feel nervous at how serious her voice sounds even with the shakiness.

"Just tell me." I feel my eyes begin to water a little bit from seeing her like this.

"I can't tell you." Tears are falling more freely now.

"Camila, please." I beg, not able to stand seeing her like this.

She shakes her head no, still looking away from me.

"I can't sit here and watch you like this. It's breaking my heart, please just tell me."

"It's my fault."

"Camila, I'll continue to tell you until you get it through that beautiful fucking head of yours. It's not your -"

"Yes it is Lauren! It is! It fucking is!" She completely snaps and goes into a full blown break down, sobbing hysterically.

"C'mere." I whisper, pulling her into me and cradling her in my arms as she tries to pull away. "It's not your fault, babe."

"Stop saying it's not my fault! Stop saying it's not my fault!" She screams furiously over and over into my chest as she tries to fight away from me, but I hold onto her tightly.

Eventually, she stops fighting and I hold her in my arms. We stay like this for a few minutes in dead silence... that is until she whispers the last thing I would ever expect.

"I told him to pick me up."