"I'm Turning Inside Out"

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I explained my dream to Anton. It honestly scared me that I had such a dream, and even he was a little shook up about it.

“Maybe because you opened up about it.” He trailed as we were in the hall as we were holding hands.

“Maybe. All I know is I really don’t want a repeat of it.” I shook my head in an attempt to shake the thoughts out, but that was unsurprisingly no use.

"Do you want me to stay with you tonight?" He asked.

"You can if you want to but I'll be okay. Its just a dream." I smiled to assure him I'd be okay.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes." I nodded.

He kissed my forehead, "Okay, but call me if you need anything tonight. Anything at all. I'm here for you." He smiled.

"Thank you." I replied as I hugged him.

"Anytime, liebe."

We went back into the studio and got to work. I tracked some more vocals and we worked on more beats.

That was how the remainder of the week and the next week went. I tracked vocals, and Porter and Anton worked on beats. It was still so fascinating to me. Being here with the guys, recording vocals, watching them create the instrumentals and them asking for my opinions. It was amazing. Porter and I were getting closer and closer every day. It was awesome to have him as a friend. I was already starting to see him as kind of like a brother to me. I think the most amazing part of this whole thing so far though, was meeting Anton and becoming his girlfriend.

Girlfriend.

It still made me blush and smile. I loved it.

I was pumped about Friday because Anton wanted to meet up for dinner. We were meeting up at One Under. It was a bar and grill here in Livonia and from what I’ve heard it was quite good. I was pretty excited to say the least.

After we were done recording on Friday, I walked out of the studio hand in hand with Anton and Porter was on the other side of me. I hugged Porter and said goodbye and Anton did the same. He waved at us as he got in his black hummer and drove off.

“I’ll meet you over at One Under in around an hour?” I told Anton, “I need to change.”

We stopped in front of my car and he wrapped his arms around my waist. He was wearing a red button down plaid shirt and a pair of jeans. He was amazing as usual. “You look gorgeous to me.” He smiled. I kissed him on the nose.

“Thank you. Still, let me change first and I’ll meet you over there.” I smiled back.

“If you insist.” He smiled and and kissed me.

“See you then!” I grinned at him as I hugged him. He walked over to his car and I got in mine. I was pretty happy about tonight. I loved spending time with him. I started the car and pulled out of the parking lot and drove over to my apartment. I got out and locked the door, then headed over to the elevators. I pressed the up button and the door opened. I hit the fourth floor button and got out when the door opened once more.

I unlocked the door and walked into my apartment. I headed straight to my bedroom where I had laid out the outfit I had picked out on my bed. I chose a dark pair of skinny jeans and a black spaghetti strap top with a black lace jacket. It was one of my favorite outfits. I took off my outfit of a red “A Day To Remember” shirt, light denim jeans, and black Vans and put on my other outfit. I put on a pair of black flats and I was good to go. I went into my bathroom and examined myself in the mirror. I touched up my eyeliner and mascara and brushed through my straight brown hair.

I needed something though. A necklace. The silver heart pendant necklace I wore on our first date popped into my head. I smiled. That was perfect. I walked over to the top of my dresser and grabbed the necklace and put it on. It definitely completed the outfit.

I put my phone and some money in my jeans pocket and picked up my car keys. I walked out the door to my apartment and locked it. I made my way back down to my car and and got in. I put the keys in and started it, listening to the engine as it purred to life. I was smiling like crazy and was excitement was building in me.

I drove out of the parking lot and began the drive to One Under. It wasn’t very far from my apartments. I pulled into the parking lot and was shocked at the size of the place. It was pretty big, but I figured the size had to do with the fact that it was also a banquet hall as well as a bar and grill. I got out of the car and walked up to the building. I found an empty parking stall next to Anton's car and parked next to it. Turning off the car, I took my keys out and got out of the car, locking it behind me. I walked up to the entrance, opened the door, and walked in. The atmosphere was definitely awesome. It was spacious and it definitely looked like an awesome place to be. There were hardwood floors, tables laid out on the floor with stools, and chocolate brown booths lined the walls. Various pictures and sports memorabillia covered the dakr colored walls.

Then I looked at the bar and felt my heart fall to the floor and shatter into pieces.

Anton was against the bar counter, and his lips were locked with another girl. I couldn’t see his face, but I definitely saw that familiar tousled brown hair and red plaid shirt of his. The girls hands were all over him and she was pressed up against him like she was glued to him. All I saw of her was her curvy figure, blonda hair, and skimpy outfit.

Without thinking I turned around and ran out the door, shoving past anyone who was in my way and got in my car. I turned the car on with shaky hands and sped out of the parking lot. I had to get away.

I always tend to run away from my problems in hope to block out the pain and the hurt. I just didn't know why.

I was numb, I felt empty. A sense of deja vu crept onto me as thoughts of Anton and that girl kissing ran through my mind. He cheated on me.

Just like Aaron did.

Not to the degree thank god, but he still cheated.

I somehow ended up in the parking lot of my apartments, which  I considered a mircale because I wasn't paying attention to my driving at all. As soon as I turned off the car, I broke down in tears, and hit the steering wheel in fustration. Trying to control my tears, I took a deep breath and slowly took out the keys of my car. I shut the car door behind me as I got out, leaning on it for support. I felt weak. I trudged all the way back up to my apartment with tears falling down my cheeks, and my heart shattered into pieces.

I hope your not mad at me over this haha. Sorry it's so short by the way. I hope you enjoyed! Update will hopefully and most likely be on Saturday!! I love you and thank you so much for reading!!!

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