freefall |[ luke kuechly ]|

|[madly]|

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December 23rd, 2012
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Ellen just took her last final and was on her way home for winter break. She was so excited to see Nicole after months of being away. Ellen had not been home since she left in August. She hadn't talked to Luke since the night she left, and thinking about it made her a mix of sad and angry. She had heard Luke was having a good rookie year from people at school. She smiled whenever they talked about him. She felt a sense of pride because she knew him on a way deeper level than they did. But she was sad because she wasn't sure if she knew him anymore. The way they ended things still hurt her. She could still hear Luke's words in the back of her mind "That's too bad because I really could have loved you Ellen Reilly."

She pulled her Altima into her regular parking spot at the apartment complex and Nicole came running out. "Ellen!" She squealed before she was enveloped into a bear hug.

"Nic! I missed you so much!" Ellen said still hanging on to her sister. They removed themselves from the hug but kept one arm around each other and waltzed up to their apartment.

"How was your semester?" Nicole asked as she made each of them a hot chocolate.

"It was good. A good distraction," Ellen answered as she fanned the steaming cup in her hand. Ellen wore a navy zip up hoodie with black leggings with dark gray boots

"A good distraction? From what?" Nicole asked naively.

"Luke?" Ellen replied as if should have been obvious. "I know we barely were an item but I felt like we had such a strong connection, like fate wanted us together. You know? And it just hurt that he didn't say goodbye or even give me a call," Ellen confessed.

"I have to tell you something and you aren't going to be happy with me," Nicole said nervously as she stirred her hot chocolate to avoid eye contact.

"What is it?" Ellen asked with a twinge of anger in her voice already.

"Um you know the day you left? How Luke didn't say goodbye?" Nicole said jogging Ellen's memory, even though she never stopped thinking about it.

"Yeah?" Ellen asked wishing Nicole would get to the point.

"Well I lied," Nicole said sheepishly.

"What do you mean you lied?" Ellen asked standing from the barstool in their kitchen.

"Luke did show up a little after you left," Nicole told her, still avoiding eye contact.

"Nicole! How could you not tell me?" Ellen said outraged that her sister kept this from her.

"I didn't think you would want to know. I'm so sorry Ellen," Nicole said with tears welling in her eyes.

"Why would I not want to know? Why didn't he call me?" Ellen asked massaging her temples trying to calm herself down.

"I told him I didn't think it would be a good idea, that you wanted to focus on your studies," Nicole said biting her bottom lip.

"What gives you the right to make decisions for me?" Ellen yelled across the marble counter at her older sister.

"I thought I was doing what was best for you!" Nicole yelled back.

"Let me make my own damn decisions!" Ellen yelled as she grabbed her jacket and slammed the door before leaving. She got in her car. She didn't know where she was going, but she just drove on. Nicole was calling her, probably asking her to come back, but instead of answering Ellen just shut her phone off.

It was raining, the weather matched Ellen's mood perfectly. The rain poured down and it was making the road hard to see but she kept driving. Before she knew it she wound up at the park Luke took her to on that August night. She put her car in park and sat on the same picnic table Luke and her sat on when they shared their first kiss. Her heart ached at the memory. She knew she wanted him, but she didn't know where to start. The rain was making her makeup run and her hair soaked, but she didn't care.

Ellen was so mad that she had spent the last few months trying to hate Luke for not saying goodbye or calling, just to find out it was Nicole's fault. Ellen began to act on impulse. She suddenly stood from the table got in her car and drove to make things right. She sat in the driveway of Luke's apartment for a second to rethink what she was about to do. She zipped up her navy blue hoodie and ran towards the door. She looked like a mess, and she felt like one too. Never had Ellen felt more confused in her life.

She went to his apartment door, on the first floor, and knocked as hard as she could. Ellen heard footsteps almost instantly. "Coming!" Luke yelled in a sing song voice. His voice made Ellen's heart skip a beat. The warmth and familiarity in it. He opened the door with a wide smile that quickly faded when he saw who it was, making Ellen even more nervous.

"Luke, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I didn't put you before my education. I'm sorry I left before you got to my apartment. I'm sorry for trying to hate you the last few months when it was all my fault. I'm sorry that I couldn't see how much you meant to me before I lost you. I'm sorry for all of it. Most importantly though Luke, I'm sorry it took me this long to figure out that you've got me falling madly in love with you," Ellen yelled over the rain that seemed to come down harder now. Her and Luke were standing about a foot from each other. His face softened. He wrapped his large hand around her neck and pulled her in quickly for a long and passionate kiss. Ellen gladly wrapped her arms around his neck and smiled as they pulled away from the kiss. Luke's hands moved from her neck to her face.

"I'm sorry too," Luke whispered. "Now come inside and dry off," he said as he draped his arm over her to protect her from the rain that had already gotten to her. Although she was freezing cold the feeling Luke gave her was just enough to warm her.
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