Just because I love you. - Phan

Wanting to die

-2 months later-

It was quiet around there. Only Phil and nature. No bullies. No abusive fathers. No other humans.

Phil lay back on the soft, fresh, green grass, and looked up at the sky. Everything hurt, and his head was clouded. He couldn’t focus on anything. Closing his eyes, the boy tried to relax.

Today had been one of the worst so far, Josh and his gang had cornered him, behind the technology block, after art. The raven haired boy had withstood many punches and kicks over the past few months, but today was more than had ever been done in a day. His whole body was covered in bruises and scratches, the many open cuts on his arm were slowly drying up. Josh and his gang had seen the edge of Phil’s blazer rolled up slightly, exposing the deep red cuts filling his forearm, then had decided to stand on the sensitive skin, slowly putting more and more pressure on the cuts until they were bleeding once again and Phil was in immense pain, calling him an ‘emo fag who deserves to die’ as they went.

After the boy limped home, he forced his limp body up to the bathroom where the razor blades were kept. He couldn’t survive this torture anymore. He just wanted to die. Pressing the blade to his already cut skin, Phil slid it horizontally down his forearm, watching as the crimson blood leaked out of the skin, ready to die.

Then came the sound of an angry man calling his name, his father. Trying to move, the boy lost his balance and fell to the floor, blood leaving out of his left arm. Footsteps came close, they were making their way upstairs, and the man was still calling his name. staying quiet didn’t work, eventually his father found him, not caring that he had a crimson liquid dripping down his arm, or that he was physically too week to move, he still used him as a punch bag. Telling him that being gay deserved to be punished.

After he left again, Phil lay on the cold, blue tiles, just wanting for it all to be over.

Slowly his eyes shut, and they boy fell into a deep slumber, from the loss of blood and weakness to move. He was physically and mentally exhausted.

That brought him to where he was now.

After a few hours Phil must have woken up to an empty house. He had regained some strength, so the boy forced himself up and walked slowly, and painfully out of the house and down the road to the woods. Using the trees for support, he made his through the trees to the other end where a field, with large strong trees were scattered around.

The whole field was empty apart from Phil and the nature that surrounded him. The sky was a light blue that was starting to fade into evening colours, where he could relax and slowing breathe his pain away. That’s when he spotted it. A large oak tree with large, strong branches. Perfect. An easy way to die.

All Phil needed was some rope.

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A/N: Hi! Sorry I haven't updated in a week or so, hopefully I'll update more frequently as I'm now on summer ^_^