"Amelia"

Chapter 1: Cutter

Amelia sat in the bathtub with her left arm hanging gently over the tile floor. Blood dripped slowly from her wrist. She could hear her mom's shouting in the hallway. The same rant repeated over and over again. Amelia sank beneath the safety of the warm water and stayed there listening as the air escaped her in peaceful little bubbles. She could imagine them floating up towards the surface and just disappearing against the cold air above. Amelia was sure that she would stay in her watery sanctuary unless the inevitable event of her death. She felt her chest grow tight, but she didn't mind. Just as she began to imagine the bubbles drifting farther than the water, she was woken from her trance by a knocking on the bathroom door. Amelia slowly lifted her head from the water to hear her mother yell,

"Amelia Morgan Montgomery, you better be out of the bath in five minutes or I'll break this door down and drag you out myself."

"Yes mom; give me a minute." Amelia shouted back.

It was days like this that she was thankful for the lock on the bathroom door.

Amelia brought her left arm back into the tub and submerged it beneath the soapy warm water. It burned and Amelia winced. This was her favorite part. Cutting was not the addiction for Amelia; rather, it was the healing. She loved to watch her broken skin reach across the vast tear and grab a hold of itself; each time sowing itself together more beautifully than the last.

She grabbed toilet paper from the dispenser and dried her wrist before reaching to the sink, grabbing the wrap, and covering up her newly opened wound. She then drained the tub and dried herself off. She slipped on her bra and underwear and then began to apply lotion to her smooth skin. Amelia traced the scars and stretchmarks that lined her hips and thighs. She saw them as such pretty little imperfections. She stared intently into her own sunken eyes in the mirror before yet again being interrupted by a knocking on the door.

"Amy! I gotta shower! Hurry up!" Nicole shouted through the door.

Amelia slipped on her sweater and sweats before looking back at the tub and seeing that she had left her blood towel on the floor. She picked it up and slipped it under the wood beneath the sink to be washed later. Amelia opened the door and smiled before replying,

"All yours, Nikki."

"Don't call me that." Nicole argued.

"Then don't call me Amy." Amelia replied snidely before walking two doors down to her bedroom.

Amelia heard a sigh from her little sister before she slammed the door. Nicole had always been a drama queen, but junior high had taken the drama up about twelve levels. Amelia stepped into her room before turning on the lights. She hated her room. She and her dad painted it a disgustingly light blue when she was nine. The walls were covered in motivational posters that her best friend had bought and put up for her. The wall closest to the window was smashed full of pictures of family and friends. The curtains were a pasty purple and the white and blue tile floor didn't help the room look any better. Despite the fact that it was always freezing and it looked horrible, the tile was so much easier to clean up after. Amelia slipped her razor back under the third leg of her dresser and brushed her hair before walking back out to the living room.

"Amelia! It's about time! Arizona want's to know if you want to spend the night with her tonight." Kirsten asked. Though she was Amelia's mother, she hadn't thought of her like that in a very long time.

"Yeah, mom; sure." Amelia replied quietly.

"Well then, hurry up and go get your bag packed." Kirsten answered angrily.

Amelia turned around and walked back to her cold room. As she walked down the hall, she could hear Nicole singing. Such a great gift was wasted on a girl who couldn't even think about being better than anyone. Amelia had always thought of Nicole as a people-pleaser, and this honestly sickened her.