Brandon. Yes, THAT Brandon.

Despite it All

The idea of it doesn't even register. Conner... jumping from the very building our team is staying at... "Oh my god," I finally manage.

"He's yelling and screaming at Tyler and—" Mitchell stops. "You need to go in there. He likes you. You guys were together or somethin' right? He won't let anyone near him. Tyler's the closest one and he's not even listening to him, Brandon. Go!" Mitchell tries to shove me through the crowd. I grab Matt's hand and drag him along with me as we push through people to get into the room. Coach Troy and Carter are in the front, keeping people from going inside. I can see that Tyler's the only one in the room with Conner.

"Stay back and stay quiet," Carter demands.

"No, no—he needs us. He needs Matt and me; just let us in," I beg. "Please, trust me. I know him. Matt knows him. Just let us in."

"You can't—"

"Matt?" I hear Conner say. Matt and I push past Troy and Carter and into the room. "Brandon..."

Tyler, of course, makes a swift exit. He doesn't even give a shit about Conner. What a goddamn tool.

"Are you on medication?" Matt asks softly. Conner shakes his head no. "Hey, can we talk? Do you want to talk to Brandon and me?" Conner rocks on the ledge, back and forth, but not in a threatening way. He stares straight ahead, as if he didn't hear Matt. I turn around and give a sharp warning to the crowd outside the door.

"Tell everyone to be quiet or close the door," I order Carter's way. "Seriously." In the next ten seconds, people are quieting down.

Conner looks like he hasn't slept in days. He must have insomnia too. I don't know why he hasn't been taking his medication. Maybe it's not the withdrawal; he could just plain be doing the wrong drugs. My heart still feels for him, and it's getting hard to see him break down over and over again. This is the last time. If his parents aren't getting him help, I certainly will, and my parents are lawyers.

"What's wrong, Conner?" I ask, trying to keep the conversation normal. He's not in a high mental place right now. Any kind of wrong attitude could set him off, including an angry tone, or even a too sympathetic one. I don't want him to think we're treating him differently. "You wanna talk about it?"

"No."

"Conner... look. You're scaring a lot of us right now," Matt says, his tone wavering. I take a step toward Conner, and he snaps his attention my way. Matt continues. "The hotel called the police and everything. I've always been there for you, Conner."

Conner scoffs and rolls his eyes. "You don't care about me unless I wanna blow you." At this point, I feel as if we should close the door. Everyone can hear our conversation loud and clear.

"That's not true and you know it." Matt and I approach Conner until we're about five feet away. "Hey, I know that you're mad. I know you're pissed about your dad and I know Tyler is a dick. He's a real dickbag but you didn't have to do all the things he told you to. I was there for you when your mom fucked up your medication and I'm here right now, Conner."

I don't even want to know. Conner obviously didn't trust me enough to tell me these things. I had the nerve to call him my "best friend". I don't know the first thing about him.

"Guess what tomorrow is," Conner says.

"Today? It's two in the morning. It's Halloween," Matt replies.

"My birthday, too..." Conner sniffs, and then covers his face with his hands. "I don't wanna go home. I hate going home—I need help."

Matt gets teary-eyed too. "Yeah, yeah, Con. You need help and that's okay. Alright? Brandon and me are gonna get you some help. C'mere."