An Alderaanian Love Story

Chapter 25

  When she woke up, Leia couldn't wait to go to bed. The days were better now that she had Han to help her deal with them, but nights were a glory she didn't deserve. Every night when Han visited, Leia was overcome with a feeling she couldn't quite put in words and she wished she could feel that way the whole day through. Last night had quickly become one of her most favorite visits and she wished Han could have stayed longer. It hadn't escaped her attention that Han seemed to be cutting their visits shorter and shorter and it worried her. Was he nervous about getting caught? He hadn't been that nervous before.

  Shaking her head and wearing a bright smile on her face, Leia got out of bed and quickly took a sanisteam before breakfast. She hoped she would be able to catch Han in the middle of his shift at Ducchi's. Then, maybe they could discuss last night.

  Crossing her room to the dresser standing beside the bed, Leia opened a drawer, but a small flimsiplast note caught her eye. At first glance, she recognized Han's handwriting and she smiled all over again, the butterflies starting up their rounds in her stomach. And then, she read it.
   A note. Yellow paper, black words, hurtful words, scary words.

  Denial and shock ran through her veins. She shook her head as if to clear her vision and read it again, but the words remained the same. "No," she muttered, falling to sit on the edge of her bed. "No. No. Please don't . . ." She read it again.

I love you, Princess. Please, please don't forget that. As hard as it will be for me to write the following things and for you to read them, I thought I'd at least start on a high note. I love you, Leia. I love you so much, I can't put it into words all that I feel for you. I wish I could be with you all day, all night, but we both know that's not realistic. And that's why I'm writing this. I love you and I don't want to leave you, but you deserve better than what I can give you. And with Jabba still searching for me, I just can't keep you in that kind of trouble. I'm sorry, Princess, I really am, but . . . but I don't want to hurt you later. That's why I left now.

Please don't be mad at me, Princess. You have no idea how hard this is for me to leave, but I love you too much to stay. Please forgive me, Princess. I love you.

 "I know," Leia muttered in response, her heart pounding too hard she couldn't manage another word. "No, Han, please. No."

  "Leia!" came the cheery call of her aunt Rouge, knocking on the door as she passed. "Leia, your parents are waiting for you downstairs! There's a guest coming! Hurry, now!"

  The note fell from Leia's shaky grasp and all she could do for the moment was stand there in complete shock. Her heart suddenly weighed too much to carry the rest of her and her legs lost the strength to keep her moving. She lamely slid off the bedside, falling into a heap on the floor. The note was within her reach and she took it in one hand, crumpling it into a ball and wetting it with her tears. She managed to sit herself up and pulled up her knees and cried into her hands, tearing the note to shreds.

  She lost track of time, had no idea how long it had been since Rouge had called her down. She was only jerked out of her personal fit when she heard another knock on the door followed by a gentler call. "Leia?" It was Sabé. "Leia, come on, now. Your parents are waiting for you."

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  No answer came back. Sabé knocked again. Still no answer. She stopped, pressed an ear to the door and listened to hear if the sanisteam or refresher were running. Her ears caught a soft noise, but it wasn't water running or the refresher flushing. No, it was . . . sobbing. Muffled by a pillow, Sabé heard the sob stretch into a long wail and something light and fluffy hit the door. The pillow, perhaps. "Leia?" she asked a third time, slowly opening the door. She kicked the pillow aside and rushed to Leia's side when her suspicions were confirmed. "Leiá, honey, calm down. What's wrong? What's happened?"
  Leia opened her hands to let a hundreds tiny pieces of flimsi paper fall to the floor, all bearing the pencil markings of some note. "He's gone," she muttered, slowly turning her gaze up to her. "He left. The bounty hunters . . . he left. . . . So they won't follow me. Sabé, he's gone."
  Sabé stopped, soaked in Leia's words, her appearance. Her heart dropped and she knew she was supposed to comfort Leia, but she didn't know what to say. What a good man! was all she could think while the same thought hurt so bad. For Leia. "He left that note?"