Best Quotes EVER!

3. The Eleventh Doctor (Matt Smith)

Amelia: I'm not scared!

The Doctor: Of course you're not! You're not scared of anything! Box falls out of the sky, man falls out of the box, man eats fish custard, and look at you! Just sitting there! So you know what I think?

Amelia: [shrugging] What?

The Doctor: Must be a hell of a scary crack in your wall.

The Doctor: Now, that's rubbish; who's that supposed to be?

Rory: Well, that's you!

The Doctor: Me?! Is that what I look like?

Rory: You don't know?

The Doctor: Busy day.

Amy: It's you. You came back.

The Doctor: 'Course I came back, I always come back. Something wrong with that?

Amy: And you kept the clothes.

The Doctor: Well I just saved the world, the whole planet, for about the millionth time, no charge. Yeah, shoot me! I kept the clothes.

Amy: Including the bow tie.

The Doctor: Yeah, it's cool. Bow ties are cool.

Dalek: Would you care for some tea?

The Doctor: [slaps tea from Dalek's tea tray] Stop this! What are you doing here? What do you want?!

Dalek: We seek only to help you.

River Song: Use the stabilisers!

The Doctor: It doesn't have stabilisers!

The Doctor: Amy Pond, you are magnificent, and I'm sorry.

Amy: It's okay, I understand. You've got to leave me.

The Doctor: Oh no, I'm not leaving you, never! I'm sorry about this! [bites her hand]

Amy: You bit me!

The Doctor: Yeah, and you're alive.

Amy: Oh, I've got a mark, look at my hand

The Doctor: And you're alive! Did I mention?

Amy: Blimey, your teeth, have you got space teeth?!

The Doctor: Yeah, alive, all I'm saying!

The Doctor: Didn't anyone ever tell you? There's one thing you never put in a trap, if you're smart. If you value your continued existence, if you have any plans about seeing tomorrow, there's one thing you never, ever put in a trap.

Angel Bob: And what would that be, sir?

The Doctor: Me.

Angel Bob: Doctor? Excuse me, hello, Doctor? Angel Bob here, sir.

The Doctor: Ah, there you are, Angel Bob. How's life? Sorry, bad subject.

River Song: [Strained] Father Octavian, when the Doctor's in the room, your one and only 'mission' is to keep him alive long enough to get everyone else home! And trust me, it's not easy! Now if he's dead back there, I'll never forgive myself. And if he's alive, I'll never forgive him. [Pause] And Doctor, you're standing right behind me, aren't you?

The Doctor: Oh yeah.

River Song: I hate you.

The Doctor: No, you don't.

The Doctor: You've swallowed a planet!

Amy: I'm pregnant.

The Doctor: You're huge!

Amy: Yeah, I'm pregnant!

The Doctor: Look at you: when worlds collide!

Amy: Doctor, I'm pregnant.

The Doctor: Oh, look at you both. Five years later, and you haven't changed a bit! Apart from age, and size...

Amy: Oh, it's good to see you, Doctor.

The Doctor: ...are you pregnant?

Craig: Has anyone ever told you that you're a bit weird?

The Doctor: They never really stop.

Shaun: You are so on the team! We've got the cup next week and we are going to annihilate them!

The Doctor: [sternly] Annihilate? No. No violence, do you understand me? Not while I'm around. Not today, not ever. I'm the Doctor, the Oncoming Storm.

[Shaun looks at him like he's crazy]

The Doctor: And you basically meant beat them in a football match, didn't you?

Shaun: Yeah.

The Doctor: ...Lovely. [grins] What sort of time?

Amy: What was that?!

The Doctor: Okay, need a proper look. Gotta draw its fire, give it a target.

Amy: How?

Doctor: You know how I sometimes have really brilliant ideas?

Amy: Yes...

The Doctor: Sorry.[The Doctor runs out from behind the Pandorica, shouting] Look at me, I'm a target!

River Song: I have questions, but number one is this: What in the name of sanity have you got on your head?

The Doctor: It's a fez. I wear a fez now. Fezzes are cool.

[Amy takes the fez and throws it in the air, and River blasts it into smithereens.]

" GERONIMO!!! " 

"Oh. Ok. I escaped, then. Brilliant. I love it when I do that. [Checks legs] Legs, yes. [Checks neck] Bow tie...cool. [Checks head. Disappointed] I can buy a fez."