Forever and Always ✔️

Chapter fifty four - Penelope.

You never really know when the last time you will ever see someone. You never know when the last kiss will be or your last hug. It could be the last memory you share or the smiles.  I guess that was what I had learnt from Zack's accident.

Our last memory we shared was the night of his party, the last smile I ever saw on his face was when he said his last words to me. I could still picture his face, even after all this time. It was cold in the hospial tonight. I was going into suergory in less than an hour, the hospital gown that I was wearing was too exposing but what choice did I have? This was for our baby girl and I couldn't lose her too, she was the only thing I had left of Zack. Who knows when he would wake up, it had been months and I missed him.

My hand touched his, it was warm considering the hospials temperature. I gripped a hold of his hand, never wanting to let it go. "So, I'm going into surgery today. Things shouldn't be too complicated, I'll come see you after I've recovered. A few days, okay? Don't go anywhere because I'm not and this little girl is counting on you to stay with us." I stood up to stroke his hair, wanting him to open his eyes. "Zack, I'll-" My sentence was cut short as I heard a long and loud sound of a beep coming from the machine.

He had gone flatline. His heart had stopped. Oh god, this was what I was afraid of.

Nurses rushed in with all of the equipment they would need in order to save his life. "Please!" I screamed, clutching my round belly, "save him!" They began doing CPR and getting the crash cart ready. I was instantly being held back by firm hands and I was being pushed out into the hall. Tears were streaming down my face and my hand was touching the window that looked inside.

"Penelope, let's get you back into bed." I heard Grayson's voice in my ear but I ignored him. I couldn't leave Zack now, he could be dead in a second.

"No," I shoved him away and by then, I was being pulled back by the hands of my father. "I need to be with him!"

My dad spun me around and pulled me in for a hug, he stroked my messy hair as I could feel his breathing against the skin on my ear. "All you can do for Zack now is to go back into bed and prepare for this surgery. He needs you and this baby alive for when he wakes up."

I let out a cry into his chest as I heard the nurses talk over each other in pure panic about saving my boyfriend. Dad and Grayson slowly walked me back to my room, the floor below Zack's as more nurses surrounded me in preperation for this surgery.

I hadn't heard anything about Zack, he could be dead and I wouldn't know. He could be in heaven right now, looking down from where he left me here alone. As I was being wheeled down the halls in the hospital in a bed, I grabbed Grayson's hand as he walks for beside me, my father was on the opposite side. "Did you hear anythig about Zack?"

Grayson shook his head as the bed stopped rolling. "This is as far as you can go." One of the nurses said to the two people standing beside me.

"I'll be checking on him now," Grayson said in a whisper, "you just keep that baby safe and I'll be there when you wake up."

I nodded, too afaird to speak without bursting into tears again. I was going through this alone, I needed Zack here to get me through this. The bed began rolling through the double doors that lead to the OR, I left Grayson and dad behind wondering about when they would walk in and find out about Zack.

He could be dead and I would have no idea.

*

Joy was all I hear, happiness was what I see. I was pretty sure it was five years from now. Our little girl just turned five, she had gotten Zack's eyes and Zack's heart. "Do you think she'll be our little heartbreaker?" Zack nudged me as we watched her play in our backyard.

I stood a distance away from this happy scene, I saw my five year older self and Zack's smiling face. "She'll take after you, I'm sure." My five year older self chuckled to him.

"Hey!" He protested, "I won your heart, didn't I?"

I bit my bottom lip to stop myself from grinning. "Then she'll have your stubborness."

I watched this unfold, analyzing what my imagination had come up with and so far, I liked it. Our little girl had that same cheeky smile just like her father and that same laugh. She had gotten my brunette hair in pigtails and I could already tell that she was the smartest girl in the room.

I never wanted her to life to end up the way mine did. I didn't want her to lose a parent and to grow up the rest of her life with a million questions like I did. I wanted her to fall in love like I did, I wanted her to expereince it all and with no regrets. My father did his best to raise me but, I had so many unanswered questions.

I would never put her through any of that, she wouldn't go to rehab or spend her days wondering why everyone around her suddenly left. I did wish that she found somebody like Zack, stubborn and persistant. I wanted him to never give up on her, to never leave her and to cherrish the moments they had together.

One day, when she was old enough to learn, I was going to teach her to never take the one you love for granted because it could all be swept away in an instant and everything you once had could be gone.

She would trip and fall but Zack and I would be by her side to pick up the broken pieces. "I am not stubborn!" Zack said defensively.

I wrapped my arms around him and kissed his ear. "You just proved my point."

As I watched the five years of my life flash foward in front of me, that was when I realised that even if Zack was gone, I knew he would be watching us from above, teaching her the things I couldn't.

*

My eyes slowly opened to the sound of machines beeping in my ear. I looked around the room, tubes were going into me, wires were hooked up around me and Grayson was sat sleeping by my side.

My mind instantly remembered Zack and not that he was still in his never ending coma but that the fact that he was dying. "Gray!" I tried to shout but it only turned into a whisper.

He jumped awake and sighed with relief that I was looking back at him. "You're awake, how do you feel?"

"Cut the crap," I said in a soft voice, "is Zack dead?"

Grayson sat up, the anticipation was killing me. He took my hand slowly, showing no sign of emotion and that was when I thought the worst. My eyes poured out a river of tears, I was sobbing and my lip was quivering.

"Hey, hey, hey," Grayson squeezed my hand, "Zack is alive, it took them twenty minutes to bring him back but he's alive. Sorry, I was just processing the fact that you're okay."

The tears stopped falling like a waterfall and my mouth turned into a relieved smile. "He's alive!" I hugged Grayson with every bit of strength that I had. "And the baby?"

"You have on perfectly healthy girl." He showed me the sonogram that was left next to me. I take a look to see our girl and I could already tell that she had Zack's nose.

*

"Looks like we both made it." I said, pulling Zack's sheet further up his body, "our girl is healthy."

I remembered Grayson telling me that he was there when Zack's heart started again. It was a joy he couldn't describe. As for me, I remembered my dream. I remembered the way we were all so happy to be together. They wouldn't let me see him for a few days until I recovered and I even tried to sneak in a visit but all the nurses had to watch out for me.

But in the end, we all made it.