Satellite| Namjin

devyniasdešimt antras [full]

Nightmare. It was all just a nightmare. An unfortunate dream that stumbled across restless sleep of NamJoon's.

He was all alone in the darkness, surrounded by nothing else than emptiness. It seemed as if he's inside spilled to the outside and wrapped him up in his own depression. However he could still feel a lonely stare looking after him. A lonely heart caring for him. A lonely soul guarding him. He didn't want to let that idea near, but the boy knew exactly who was that secret angel.

Kim SeokJin.

The dark was cold and unpleasant, but not unfamiliar. He had been here for one too many times. But he has always been alone. He was alone now too, but someone was watching after him. There was the difference. Only the greatest people of this world manage to make the difference. And then make those differences count, mean something. This person made difference.

Kim SeokJin.

NamJoon stumbled in the dark tripping and falling, but never stopping. He gazed his body and his skin bewildered as he noticed the open cut on his knee. As soon as he tried to move the pain stung so harsh NamJoon froze. He breathed in to manage to the pain, but the ache didn't go away. That's when he heard a voice call him for the first time. He knew exactly whom the voice belonged to.

Kim SeokJin.

The strange energy coming out of nowhere was pushing NamJoon forwards even if the voice behind him was calling him. He didn't want to look back. He couldn't look back. He mustn't have looked back. Or he would stop and never run again. He would stay there forever, together with the person calling him.

Kim SeokJin.

So he went. He went even through agony, it was making him dizzy and weak. NamJoon ignored it. "NamJoon don't go!" The voice was near. "I can help you! I'll alway be here." NamJoon bit the inside of his mouth. "No!" His voice echoed in apparently completely empty dark space. "You're a traitor, a liar, I don't trust you." He wasn't looking back. Then suddenly the voice appared right behind him. Right next to his ear.

"NamJoon, trust me."

"No." He was biting his lip so hard it started to bleed. "I will never trust you."

"You want me to leave?" The voice was sad. "I just want you to be happy."

"Get out." The blood from his knee and lip was dripping on the ground.

"If that's what makes you happy." The voice was so close. Few more seconds and NamJoon was once again covered in complete silence. "Goodbye." The sound came from so far it seemed like from other universe.

NamJoon't couldn't wait a second longer, he turned around with tears in his eyes. "Hyung!" The space was empty. He was alone.

NamJoon woke up soaking in cold sweat. His chest was going up and down at such speed, it seemed his heart will explode. He could't waste another second, so he just threw the sheets off his bed and jumped on the ground running to the window tripping several times. NamJoon leaned on the sill and opened the window.

He was greeted by silence. "Hyung." His voice was definitely too quiet for anyone to hear. NamJoon suddenly noticed branches of the tree near moving. His heart skipped. "Hyung." He called again. The wind blew stronger and now the whole tree moved. It wasn't him. "He lied." NamJoon sighed as suddenly something on the ground caught his attention. He glanced down and cringed. Jin was standing there on the yard, he had accidentally stepped on the fallen branch. NamJoom didn't hesitate and with adrenaline rushing through his blood he closed the window with a huge noise. Now he was sure that Jin must have heard that.

NamJoon leaned on the wall next to the window and slid down all the way to the ground sitting on the floor. He was breathing fast and unsteadily. He gnashed and hit the wall with his fist in frustration. The boy couldn't stop blaming himself for being weak, for glancing out the window. For looking for his hyung in general. He shouldn't have cared. He tried his best to lose care, but all he could think about was SeokJin.

Even if he hurt him.

Even if he betrayed him.

He still thought about and only about him.

NamJoon lifted his head and his gaze stopped by the flickering light in the sky. It wasn't a star, stars don't flicker, they shine steadily guiding people's way through life. It was a satellite. A light that was always changing, just like people's lives and wishes. And right now NamJoon closed his eyes and wished so hard, trying to forget and regretting every single one of the wishes made in the past.

But he couldn't turn back time, nor he could predict which of them the ignorant satellite will choose to make come true. But he sure as hell wished it was this one.

Find guts to forgive.

;;

92nd chapter omg, I'm shaking!!!
Hope you're all excited :)