The Boy with the Blind Eyes

TEN

Two weeks later 

Time was dragging by in the same way it used to before. Before Hamilton. Before her life.

Tamsin didn't get the full story of what had happened to her mother. She'd never gotten any kind of story before in her life; never been trusted to understand something like that. She was angry because of it now. She was entitled to know why.

Memories of her rotten temper surfaced in her mind. Times when she had yelled at her mother, made her feel guilty for things that weren't her fault. Times when she had pushed her away. A single teardrop fell from her eye, right into the middle of her mother's pale chest.

She was dressed well today, at least. They had done a good job of disguising the tear in her head and the way her arm had been dangling from her shoulder, hanging by a small thread. Tamsin wished she could remove the horrific images of the past two weeks, of staring at a lifeless body that never arose from its slumber. No. Her mother had passed silently on, into another dimension Tamsin didn't know existed.

And it supposed, after all, that Trey had been right. Rosalyn didn't wake up. No amount of hoping or praying could bring her back.

And her father. He still didn't know. The police assured Tamsin over and over again that he would not know anything other than her mother had been in an accident, was rushed to hospital, wasn't saved, and was buried privately. He alone would assume Tamsin's Aunt Myra was grieving, and he wouldn't contact her. He would blindly accept it, and when his drunk mind would remember, he would think of Trey.

'I'm sorry,' Sergeant Reynolds had said quietly, when Tamsin asked if he would have to go back to their father's. 'He is under eighteen and has another parent. That matter is entirely out of our hands.'

Tamsin clutched her brother's small hand like it was the key to life. She knew she had to let go eventually, but couldn't bring herself to. Trey would probably starve. He would be neglected. His school fees would be ignored, and eventually, he'd be kicked out. And then what?

Tamsin screwed up her nose at the sight of her mother. She looked different than she ever did. Pretty, almost. Young. Peaceful.

Tamsin shook her head, stepping back and away from the coffin, dragging Trey with her. He was silent, but she knew he was thinking the same thing she was: that it had all happened so unbelievably fast. It seemed impossible that she could even be gone. Two weeks ago she was there in the hospital with Tamsin, seeing Hamilton, meeting Milly. The day after...immobile. And then, without warning, she'd slipped away, somewhere between the fourteen days Tamsin had been praying for her to live.

The funeral was over quickly. There was nobody else there to politely thank for coming. Tamsin had told Lina, Brett and the others to stay away; that she needed time to herself and with her brother to grieve their loss.

Now all she wanted was to be hugged by someone bigger, stronger and wiser than herself. She wanted the security of someone whispering to her that it would all be alright. But now, more than ever, Tamsin knew that she had to step up and be that person for her brother. He would be lost. And he was so young to be left without a mother.

'I don't think I'll ever be okay again,' Trey mumbled, when he was in the passenger seat of Lina's car and the doors were firmly closed. She had her Chrysler shipped to Manhattan after leaving her hometown, and insisted Tamsin borrow it for the day.

'Me either.'

She knew she wasn't supposed to agree with him and be weak, but there was no other way for her to be in that moment. Her mother was lost forever, away someplace Tamsin knew nothing of.

Trey sighed. 'Will I go home?'

'Yes,' Tamsin said sadly. She took his hands in hers and said firmly, 'but know that I love you more than words can describe. I will find a way to bring you back.'

Trey didn't look convinced, but he smiled sadly for her sake and said nothing.

Tamsin put the keys into the ignition, and withheld a sob. Starting the car, she couldn't help but think miserably that this might be the last time—for a long time—that she would ever see her brother.

The drive to Breakwater Grove was slow and silent. They had only the radio on, but halfway through the trip, Trey had reached over sullenly and switched it off.

'You'll be alright,' Tamsin said, without thinking about it. It wasn't true. She knew he wouldn't be alright, and so did he. He scoffed, and, as usual, said nothing. At this remark, she couldn't help but feel angry. She was trying to help and Trey wasn't making it easy. 'Don't do that,' she berated sharply.

Trey glared at her.

'I lost my mother, too, Trey. I'm trying to teach you that even when you get knocked down you can't just give up! You have to have the guts to get back up!'

'I don't WANT to get back up!' He screamed at her. 'There's no reason for me to even live anymore! I should just— '

'Don't!' Tamsin yelled. 'Don't you dare. Do not say it, Trey, you have too much to live for.'

'I don't want to live for anything except that I just want to be able to want to live! Don't you get it? I can't just get over it. She was my mom.'

'She was my mom, too,' Tamsin sobbed. She covered her mouth, inhaling sharply. Reaching for a tissue in the console, she sighed heavily. 'I don't want to accept this either. But we don't have a choice. We just have to keep going.'

'No.'

'Yes!'

'No!' He screamed fiercely.

'YES.'

Tamsin pulled up out the front of the place she used to live. She would give anything for Trey to come back to Manhattan with her, but it couldn't happen, not unless she wanted to be arrested.

'This might be the last time I see you in a long time.' She admitted.

He glared and whirled on her. 'You don't think I know that? I'm losing both of you in the same day.'

'Don't say that,' she cried softly. 'You haven't lost me or mom.'

'Then what do you call this?' He choked. 'Because I don't exactly think this is a reunion.'

'Whatever this is, it's not loss.'

Trey shrugged. 'I can't fight anymore. I just can't.'

'It's okay.' She said. She wrapped her arms around him, gently stroking his hair. 'It's going to be okay; you'll see. I'll find a way to— '

'Hey!'

Tamsin's blood ran cold. That was a familiar voice. She shook in her seat. That was the voice that had haunted her childhood. Her instincts told her to put the car in drive and boot it out of there. But she fought against it, kissed Trey's head, and watched as he got out of the car. She wound up the window, ignoring the staggering man walking up his driveway towards Lina's car.

And then, when Trey had collected his things and began to walk towards the house that would ruin him, she put the window down again. She had to face her own fears in order to show Trey he could do the same. She waved out the window to him and began to drive away, right before her father would have approached. 'Love you, Trey.'

And then she sped away.

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