The Boy with the Blind Eyes

THIRTY-ONE

'Sometimes I wonder why we wait,' Tamsin whispered against Brett's chest. The harsh rays of the afternoon sun spilled onto the bed, warming their bodies. Tamsin hadn't gotten very far when she'd stormed out on Lina. She'd headed to Brett's, not knowing whether or not he was home, but hoping with every part of her that he was. Lina's comment had left her unsettled and questioning her relationship.

'Wait for what?' He murmured against her ear, his lips tickling her skin. She smiled a little and propped herself up on one elbow, leaning down to look at him.

'You know. Wait.'

'Oh. Oh.' He seemed taken aback. 'Well...what makes you think that?'

'I just don't know why we're waiting. I mean, what for? Right? If we want to, I think we should do it.' She ignored the nervous pounding of her heart in her chest and tried to justify to herself that this was okay. It was okay that she was talking like this. It was even okay that she meant it.

Brett blinked a few times as if he didn't know what to make of it all. He exhaled a sharp, surprised laugh, shaking his head. 'What are you saying, that you want to?'

She bit the inside of her cheek, unsure of herself now that she'd approached these dangerous waters. She shrugged. 'I don't know. Do you?'

'I asked you first.'

She laughed then, whacking him with a pillow. 'Come on, Brett, what are we, twelve?'

Smiling softly, he stroked her cheek lovingly. 'Fine. Maybe I do.' His brow rose challengingly, anticipating her answer. 'C'mon, don't leaving me hanging here. Do you feel the same way?'

She licked her lips and pursed them together thoughtfully; stalling. It would be terrifying if anything ever happened between them, and yet, she was curious to know what it would feel like to be so close to someone. The only problem was that she couldn't rewind the clock if things turned awry. They had to be perfect. Planned out to the minute. She wouldn't feel comfortable otherwise. She needed to feel in control. 'Okay, I'm going to answer you honestly, but I don't want you to be...offended in any way.'

His face instantly neutralized, but she could see the nervousness behind his blue eyes. 'Okay,' he sounded unsure.

'Yes. I would want to. But I wouldn't feel comfortable unless I planned everything. When, where...all that stuff. I just need to feel like I'm the one in control.'

He nodded. 'I understand. You've never...been involved like that before, so, I understand.'

'Really?'

'Of course. Tam, I'm not a monster.' He pulled her back down to his chest again, where she rested her head against his collarbone. She felt safe as he wrapped his muscly arms around her, holding her close. 'I wouldn't ever make you do anything that would make you feel uncomfortable. And I want you to know that we don't need to do anything if you're not really ready.'

'What if I am, though?'

'Then you are. It doesn't mean we need to meet a deadline or anything. It just means you're ready.'

'Hey?'

'Mm?'

'I love you, you know.'

He pressed his lips gently to her temple. 'I love you, too.' He whispered back.

---

The knock came at 4.06 a.m.

Tamsin jolted in her position on the bed. The first thing she noticed was the welcoming smell of cologne—specifically, Brett's cologne. With a chuckle, she realised she had fallen asleep with him again. They'd slept already for 13 hours—halfway through the day up until 4 am. But wait—what had woken her? That's right. Someone was at the door. What if it had been a teacher? Were they looking for her?