Irish Daddy {nh}

{9:Late night escapades}

N

"Uh-h what?" The words melted from my mouth, knowing exactly what she was asking me, but her abrupt words stunned me.

"Do you have a preferable kink? What really gets you going, my little Irish boy?" She whispered the last part, her lips brushing against my ear lobe, the feeling of her wet lips making me shiver. My stomach was twisting with a well known emotion, fear but desire was creeping it's way in as her fingers were still holding my locks of hair in her hand, our eye contact never breaking.

"I don't know, I don't believe I do." I whispered back, my shy side showing itself to Lena. I grabbed her hand from its slight hold in my hair, holding it in mine for a second then releasing it, realizing how odd that must've seemed. I nervously cleared my throat, leaning my body away from the close proximity between the two of us.

"Would you like one?" She questioned, a ghost of a smirk making its way onto her face, her eyes filled with a glint of something unknown to me. "Would you like for me to call you daddy?" Her body made its way above mine in a short amount of time, her hips perched on my own. I felt claustrophobic and a little light headed with her actions, not knowing how to respond as my heart beat quickened and I was kinda scared.

My paralyzed body watched hers as it towered over mine and she slowly leaned down to my lips. My stomach twisted again, feeling as if I might throw up the spaghetti we had eaten earlier. The moment she placed her lips on the space centimeters from my virgin lips, I panicked and placed my hand against her shoulder, kindly pushing her away from me.

"I must go." The only words my shaky voice could make out, as I slid my body from beneath hers and awkwardly but quickly walked out of her room. Nobody was downstairs as I found myself running out her front door, feeling overwhelmed by everything that just happened in her fairy light room.

The rain splattered onto my clammy skin, cooling down my flustered self, but finding a way to almost make me feel even more sick. I had no idea why my encounter with Lena held so much intensity. My short run from Lena's house to my own, was almost like a blessing, making my way inside with a dampened body, without getting noticed by anyone inside, being that it was late. But it's not like the time really mattered whether or not I would be noticed anyway.

I jogged my way upstairs, in a hurry to just find a small moment of peace so I can think this through. After changing into a pair of sweats and drying my hair a little, I turned off the lights in my room and hopped beneath the covers on my bed. I removed my glasses, placing them on the beside table, hearing the rumble of thunder outside and seeing lightening flashing through my darkened room. My blue eyes peered up at the ceiling, focusing in on the darkness. After a few minutes of endless staring at absolutely nothing and zero thoughts coming into my mind, finding myself still in shock at everything, an idea hit me.

I threw the covers off of me and ran to my desk in a hurry, unplugging my laptop and running back over to my bed, bouncing onto the mattress. My left hand flipped open the laptop cover, my right hand fumbling for my glasses at the same time. I clicked open the safari icon and furiously typed out 'daddy kink', clicking enter with as much vigor. 

The page for my requested search took forever to load, making me groan with annoyance, but it soon loaded. The first website showing up being 'urban dictionary', so I clicked on it, going into this research completely unaware of what was ahead of me.

Where during sexual intercourse the male is being aroused when the female or
cooresponding male called him "daddy"

I found this sort of odd, questioning why a simple word like daddy would arouse someone. I replayed the word over and over in my head, finding nothing interesting about the single word. I wanted to understand this more, so I removed myself from that website and scrolled down, actually shocked there was so much information out there about this subject. The next website I ventured to was called 'the kink realm' giving almost a research paper type of definition, making me cringe at the concept, even when the writer described how it's an art with exaggeration, but I wasn't knocking it yet.

I clicked out of that website, finding myself on a tumblr page. My eyes widened at the pictures that appeared on my screen, lingerie that had the word daddy splayed across them and barely covered female bodies laid out in sexual manners. Damn I'm gonna need to erase my search history for sure. I sat up in bed, slightly more interested in the topic, finding the concept more and more pleasing as my research continued and then I came across slightly more graphic pictures, spanking being the cause of the red and purple bruises on the skin of the girls posing in the pictures, subtitles typed out on the bottom saying phrases such as 'girls who tease go over knees' or 'spank me, daddy'.

Occasionally I would peer up from the only light source in my room, making sure I couldn't hear anyone downstairs, feeling slightly rebellious as I searched up such naughty things. I had completely forgotten about the raging storm outside or the fact that it was close to 1 am and I had to get up for school tomorrow, having been too immersed in the world of daddy kink.

I didn't find it to be as horrifying as I had believed before, it awakened something inside of me, something that wanted to feel dirty and portray something along the lines of this particular kink, possibly. The idea of having control over a female during intercourse was such a pleasing sense of behavior, being able to please them and have them please you back by obeying was such an odd concept that I understood a little more now.

I then remembered how this all started, making me feel embarrassed by the way I had acted earlier only because I had been less aware of the subject Lena had thrown at me. She must've thought I was a freak, making my heart clench because maybe I had just lost my only friend, and for what because I was too scared of a girls touch and fearful of getting myself into sexual actions.

But why does everything feel so wrong, my conscience lead me down a good path, as usual, but maybe just maybe I didn't want to go down the good path all the time. I wanted to try the wrong path for once, I wanted to experience something out of the ordinary, living in fear of going against my morals but also living with the feeling of freedom.

I feel like this is the change I've been waiting for this senior year, I had wanted to be different and this may be my chance. I want to take part in this with Lena, I have finally decided, no matter how unfitting it may seem for me. Although my thoughts at this moment feel so completely wrong, they feel so damn right and I don't care how cliche that sounds.

__________________________________
Daddy Horan is here.
Vote and comment if you'd like!