Where I Found You

Chapter 46 - Alyssa.

Chapter 46 - Alyssa.

It's half six in the morning. I keep watching my house - my parents' house - from Jack's window, but nothing seems out of the ordinary. I watch my dad go to work, and I feel so lonely, because I want him to love me, because I am his daughter. But he doesn't even look sad, or like he misses me.

I can only think about Jack and how he felt when his mother died; how he couldn't even check if she was okay like I can with my parents (but she obviously wasn't okay, she was dead).

What I mean is, he didn't know where she was and he didn't even get a reaction about it from her because she was just gone, and it must be such an awful thing for someone so close to you to die; here one day as perfect as anything, and then gone the next.

Jack is asleep still, as I watch my dad's car drive away. I think everyone is asleep in this house, but Michael has gone to work. He hasn't really spoken to me an awful lot, but nothing can be worse than how my parents reacted. And he is still kind to me.

I sigh and go into the bathroom, and look at myself in the mirror; white-faced, confused and small . . . And I'm going to be a mother.

I slowly start brushing my teeth, staring at myself in the mirror and seeing myself like I've never seen before.

Suddenly the door opens and I stare at Dan with foam all around my mouth, and then slowly spit toothpaste into the sink and rinse my toothbrush.

He looks tired, staring at me, and he slowly raises his eyebrows. "Sorry. I just wanted to pee."

"I'm just- going . . . " I trail off when I see him staring down at my stomach, and then I find myself placing my hand over it.

"Sorry," he says again, finally looking up at me. "It's just- crazy, that there's a person in there." He looks sort of overwhelmed for a few seconds, and then a grin blossoms onto his face and I smile slightly, slowly sliding past him, and he watches me go, still looking so so amazed.

In Jack's room, I crawl into the warm bed beside him and I don't care about my parents right now anymore because I have Jack, and Dan, and Stella, Jess and Michael, and Katy and Niall, too.

And as Jack lies there sleeping heavily with his mouth closed and his arm stretched out towards my side of the bed and his black hair all tousled, I kiss his cheek and tell him how very much I love him before I fall back to sleep too.

"I have work today," Jack whispers when I wake up again and he isn't beside me. It's still early because I can't hear the others walking around, and Jack is walking around the room in his jeans, with wet hair from the shower and his belt half on. He grabs a shirt and then pulls it over his head quickly.

"Okay." My voice is hoarse. I sit up and then stand up, going over to place my hands on his shoulders, and kiss him quickly.

"I don't have to go yet." He smiles and slowly runs his hands under the back of my shirt, and then under the front, over my tummy. Jack glances up at me, before kneeling down and gently kissing over it.

"I love you," I whisper as he stands back up again, and kisses me deeply. I feel myself getting lost all of a sudden, moving my lips against his slowly, erotically, until he starts to kiss down my neck, pushing me gently back towards the bed, sitting me down, laying me down.

"I love you," he whispers back after a while, running his hands down my entire body and kissing me, everywhere, and I love him so much.

Soon after I go downstairs with him while he gets a piece of toast for breakfast, and the whole house is sleepy and silent.