The Other Potter. Book Four.

Tails of friendship.

I woke up, still underwater, but I could breathe.

I AM A MERMAID!

Excitedly I looked down, at what I expected to be a tail, but unfortunately were my pasty white legs.

So I can breathe underwater...

That’s unusual.

Or can I?

I looked at Harry, who looked like he was about to have some kind of psychotic breakdown.

Then he pointed at me, and I looked down again.

Something scaly had formed where my legs should be.

HOLY MOTHER OF SHITAKE MUSHROOMS!

BY THE POWER VESTED IN LLAMAS,

I’M A MERMAID!

Harry was having a session of insanity, but I was swimming in circles.

So, I’m a mermaid at the bottom of a lake, where Hermione, Ron and Some blonde girl are unconscious. Harry’s here looking like a douche. Cedric has already been here and taken Cho Chang. Krum has to come and take ‘Mione, Fleur has to come and take little blondie.

I’m here being a mermaid.

“Wait, does this mean I can talk?” I said aloud. My voice came out in a sing song voice. “THIS IS AWESOME! HERES A LLAMA-“ and then I stopped abruptly as a man with a shark’s head came over.

“Oh, hi Krum, I’m a mermaid, how you doin’?”

Shark boy looked at me and shrugged before taking Hermione and swimming away.

Harry and I kind of stood – or floated with an epic mermaid tail- there on the bottom of the black lake looking awkward. I wasn’t sure whether I was meant to swim away or stay with Harry, but I just stayed there because I can’t make executive decisions.

I’ll tell this tale to my kids one day.

“This one time, I apparated to the bottom of the black lake and nearly died, but then I turned into a mermaid and it was good-”

Oh wait, sorry, forever alone.

I’ll tell my cats.

Harry was standing there, and I didn’t know if I was confusing him, or if he was just stupid.

“You get Ron, and you go. It’s not that hard. Bro.” I sang.

Can I speak normally?

Maybe being a mermaid isn’t all it’s cracked up to be...

BAHAHAHAH JOKES! IT’S AWESOME!

“But, her!” Harry mouthed, pointing at the blonde girl.

“Fine, I’ll take the Blondie.” I sang.

Hitching the kid over my shoulder, I swam easily through the water. I swam up and up and up before I looked and saw Harry epic failing.

I swam back down and saw Harry was drowning because he didn’t have gills anymore.

Grabbing the girl on one side, Harry –still clutching Ron- on the other, I swam up until we broke the surface.

Everyone in the stands burst into applause, and  Ron and the girl were waking up.

“now I’m going to look like I’m grabbing you so no one can say I helped you.” I muttered to Harry.

“What about your tail?” Harry said in a hushed voice.