Let the music guide you Drew.

letting the music guide me

The morning after the morning before and my head was pounding like i'd been hit by a boxer multiple times, but no, it was a deadly ass hangover i had been suffering since Saturday night, today was a Monday, meaning school and I had a horrible gut feeling that Shane might not be there.

My body hauled itself up from my not so comfy bed so I could see my reflection in the mirror, I look as ruff as a badger, but, it was also eight thirty, I was five minutes bloody late, good one you idiot!

The school uniform my dad had ironed for me on the Saturday night was lying neatly across my desk chair, looking so white and neat, I chucked it on and sighed deeply, what if Shane wasn't there? he could easily just leave, he could of left by now? Everything that happened saturday night was surreal and to be frank, I was a hundred a hundred percent sure if it all happened, either way, Shane nor my dad have made contact with me.

There was no time for breakfast, no time to try and make myself look presentable, just time to grab my bag, my bass and my keys, then leave.

What would I do? i'd have to sit alone, talk to myself, go to band practice myself...Wow, I relied on Shane far too much for my own good.

~Shanes pov~

Suitcase was packed, taxi was outside and Kier held my guitar in my hand, I was ready to leave a town i'd caused far too much worse than I have good. Today i'd leave the guy I loved so he could start anew and my parents to live their drunken abusive life without a son to drag down..Today my new life started.

'you okay mate? can't believe you're leaving, most all can't believe I've got up at eight to get to yours to help you bloody well leave!' he asked, laughing nervousley although looking at him you could clearly see his eyes quickly watering up.

'i am fine, thank you for helping, it is for the best' I mumbled as we walked out my door and loaded my stuff into the back of the black taxi about to take me to the train station.

I got in myself, I was shaking, I was about to leave everything.. will I regret it? probably.. but I needed to go, this was my only opportunity.

Kier came to the window and I rolled it down.

'bye Shane, you were an amazing friend, and just because youre going up to Scotland does not mean you don't call,Skype or text me frequently! I want to know how hot the girls are up there and..of course how you are' he winked, sniffling slightly.

'bye Kier' I smiled, I took an envelope from out my waistcoat pocket, handing it to my red fringed best friend. ' give this to Drew will you?, bye'

He took the note without hesitancy, stepping back from the taxi as I drove off, waving until I was out my drive, good bye England, good bye.

~Drews pov~

The empty school halls echoed my my footsteps as I ran in to school and down the halls to maths until I reached my maths class room. No part of me was sure what I'd do if Shane wasn't sitting in his usual seat, looking at me and complaining that I was late as usual. My heart was skipping as I opened the door just thinking about, a blink of an eye and my whole maths class was staring at me glary eyed, but no Shane. His seat was empty and his worksheet was laid out on the table, I walked over and sat in the empty seat next to his and sighed, Miss not even realising I had came in, I felt invisible.

I had never experienced a longer maths, I usually had Shane to talk to, or, before everything changed, I had people to help me wind up the teacher, but today, I had no one, I couldn't do the work and all my body wanted to do was break down. What even was a trinomial???

~Shanes pov~

I sat in the station, surrounded by people I had never met and knew nothing about, I wondered if they had better lives than me, if that girl was crying because she broke up with her boyfriend too, where those lads were going on the train, if that old woman was able to carry her bag..and if that guy was bloody well single. A part of me wanted to cry, pick up my bags and catch a bus back home, but another part of me needed this fresh start, beside, I had ten minutes until my train was to arrive, I couldn't miss this opportunity now.

My phone had not rung, vibrated or went off in anyway, indicating no one cared for me and would rather I left. I got up, picked up my suitcase and my guitar and rolled it a way with me to platform five to wait for my ticket to freedom, away from every thing I'd ever fucked up in life.

~Drews pov~

It was twenty past three and in five minutes i'd be releases from school and able to release some upset through playing bass. Again, I was sat alone, in silence all the way through chemistry, hoping tongod no one tried to speak to me or i'd probably cry.

What if I got to Kiers and the guys didn't want anything to do with me? what if I was yet again a reject from the group? what if now, I was well and truly alone?

The bell rang and the whole class got up pit their seats, collected their things then walked out to go home, be with a loved one or go to study class, I don't know, but all I wanted to do was see Shane.

haha, maybe he'd be sitting waiting for me at Kiers, smiling, arms out ready for a hug and apologising a million times. I dragged my bag and bass out of school and walked the mere few minutes to band practice where I'd soon find out everything.

~Shanes pov~

I was in Scotland, well I was guessing so due to the high amounts of sheep and stuff there was in the country side. The time was just after half past three and my heart skipped a beat. I wonder if Drew is ok? If he is back to his old self already? If he has read the note....

I started to feel a bit sick as I stared out onto the hilly countryside of my new beginning.

~Drews pov~

Kier slowly opened his door and greeted me with a smile, he didn't say anything until we had walked all the way up the stairs and into the band room.

'Hey Drew, you okay?' Laurence asked, he was violently chewing on the end of his pencil as he said it

'um..no not really, but let's just play yeah? I was kind of hoping Shane would be here..he wasn't at school-'

'I know' Kier mumbled, pulling out a piece of paper and handing it to me.

I opened it without hesitation.

Dear Drew, when I told you I was leaving, I really meant it. When ingot home on Saturday night I called my auntie and arranged to stay with her, I mean, its not like it would help if I stayed here, you are better off being with a beautiful girl and with a full family..you know, you are better off happy? Anyway, I'm in Scotland, not going to tell you where though. I just wanted to tell you to let the music guide you, because, whatever you may think, music helps people cope. So strum what bass, maybe take up singing? learn some guitar..just be yourself through music and I guarantee you'll be a little happier. Never forget that I love you Drew, I love you a lot and I moved away for you. If in the future I see you, I hope you're well, just remember, Let the music guide you drew xx

Love,

the failure that ruined you life yet the one who love you,

Shane xxxxxx

{tell the others I love them}

My heart was thumping at a million miles an hour, tears were quickly forming in my eyes and the three boys stared at me longingly to tell them what the note read.

'so? what happened? ' Luke asked

'he-h-he se-sends his love...and I have t-to let the music g-uide me' I forced myself to answer him as the tears choked me.

The room was filled with silence, I dropped the note on the floor, picked up my bass, plugged it into the amp and started to play. Tears were falling on the strings, i was making so many mistakes, yet it felt right, I was doing what Shane wanted and I guess, for however long it will be till I see him, the music will guide me until then.