A Year of Stories (Collection Two)

Moon Blue Eyes

"Did I ever tell you about that time I shot a guy?"

"You didn't shoot anyone Lars."

"I did! Tell 'em Stew, tell 'em about that guy I shot."

"I just pour the drinks Lars, not my job to vouch for your fish tales."

"Tell 'em the truth Stew!"

"Come on Lars, people come here to relax..."

"And I ain't stopping 'em. How about this Harry, you get me another one of these, and I'll tell you a nice, relaxing story."

"There are easier ways to get a free drink, you know?"

"See what you did Stew? Got this man here thinking I'm a liar."

"I don't think you're a liar, I think you're drunk."

"Tell 'em I'm not lyin' Stew! Never lied a day in my life!"

"Lars, it's getting late..."

"You go on and tell 'em Stew!"

"If that's what it'll take to quiet you down. He ain't lying Harry, that much I can say."

"Listen. Not that it matters either way, but how do you know that?"

"Because the crazy bastard did it right here..."

2.

"Alright. Here's how it went down. There was this fellow, sitting right there where you are now. Big fellow, broad shoulders, looked like he might have played High School ball – real Linebacker type."

"Sure...linebacker... Lars, if you don't mind me asking, why did you have gun in here in the first place?"

"I do mind. Maybe you haven't heard of the 2nd Amendment? Says I can carry my gun wherever I damn well please...Don't know how things work over in tea and crumpet land, but 'round here we believe in protecting ourselves."

"Leave him be Lars."

"Didn't mean nothin', just messin' around. Anyway, this big fellow, he drank like a fish. Ever see anyone drink like him Stew?"

"No one who liked to keep breathing..."

"Right. Fellow drank like he was tryin' drown himself at the bottom of one of them bottles."

"And you were drinking too?"

"No more than usual."